Alex Interviews: Lily Starr

You know what I haven’t posted in a long time?
And interview!
Today seems like as good a day as any to get back into it. Today, I’m interviewing my good friend and fellow model Lily Starr. Lily is one of the first people that I met when I got into spanking modeling, and she’s just as sweet as can be. I’ve asked her questions without assuming that everyone knows the stuff about her that I do, for the full effect. 🙂

Lily and I at Disneyland.

Producing and acting in spanking videos is your profession. Is it safe to assume that spanking is also part of your personal life? 
Absolutely. I was a born spanko, the video thing came about as a product of my lifelong interest in spanking combined with my lifelong dream of being able to act in movies. I started seeking spanking in my personal life long before I ever got into videos, and I currently am spanked regularly both on and off camera as I am in a loving D/s relationship with my awesome boyfriend, Robert Wolf.

“When I was 19 my husband and I got our first computer with the Internet and naturally I secretly searched the word “spanking” just like I had done so many times in the dictionary growing up. But I didn’t find just that dictionary definition, I found ALL OF THIS. “

For how long have you known that you were a spanko? 

I had all the classic signs of being a spanko child: looking up spanking in the dictionary, including spanking whenever possible while playing house or with my toys, being excited by spankings in books, movies, or on TV shows such as I Love Lucy, and trying to get my vanilla girlfriends to spank me. I remember being maybe 7 and lining up all my dolls and stuffed animals so I could play The Old Woman Who Lived In A Shoe and spank them all soundly and send them to bed. The earliest I can remember being fascinated with spanking is age 5, but it easily could have been even earlier than I can remember, and I suspect it was. I believe I was born this way!

For me, my spanking fantasies started out being exclusively about me being spanked by men and it wasn’t until I started to explore things further that I became curious about being spanked by women and about topping. Did you have a similar experience, or were you always interested in all sides of it? 

It was pretty much the same for me. Growing up I always fantasized most about a male authority figure doing the spanking. Any spanking did excite me, the gender of the participants didn’t matter and like I said, I did try to get female friends to spank me while playing house, etc. though that may have been because I wasn’t allowed to play with boys. To this day, the dynamic that most appeals to me is being spanked as a little girl by a Daddy figure. When I first discovered this world, I never imagined I’d want to do anything but bottom. But after some time, I did become curious, and started spanking others which went quite well. I consider myself a pretty good spanker now and do it professionally, but deep down I still mostly crave playing out that naughty little girl side with which I most deeply identify.

 How old were you when you got your first adult spanking? Was it a good experience?

Well, I had an extremely sheltered religious upbringing. I was pressured to marry young, and never had any exposure to the outside world, so I had no idea that there were people like me into spanking out there, I had never even heard of the words fetish or kink. When I was 19 my husband and I got our first computer with the Internet and naturally I secretly searched the word “spanking” just like I had done so many times in the dictionary growing up. But I didn’t find just that dictionary definition, I found ALL OF THIS. 
The discovery was incredible, I wasn’t alone, this was something lots of people do and enjoy! But here I was, already married to a guy who had no idea and I didn’t know how he would react to it if I said something. I felt very nervous and shy to bring it up and afraid he’d be freaked out. People I spoke to on the message boards encouraged me to bring it up, and I did. One day during sex I just squeaked out, “Could you maybe spank me?” He did a little bit but it didn’t hurt, so I said, “Um, a little harder?” And he did. He spanked me throughout our marriage, hard as I wanted, but only as part of foreplay and only because I liked it. He made a point to tell me it did nothing for him, which kind of ruined it for me. It was a lot harder for me to express how I wanted it to feel disciplinary, because I knew he wasn’t into it and didn’t understand that aspect. When the movie Secretary came out on Netflix, I ordered it and we watched it together. I was mortified through the whole thing, but afterward he said he got it, that was what I wanted, and gave me the best spanking I ever had from him. He really got into it that night, but then we went back to being the same, it never really took. 
Because he was vanilla, I really consider my first adult spanking to be the first one I got after we divorced. I somehow managed to find someone through vanilla online social networking who was in my small town, around my age, shared my spanking interest, and with whom I had good chemistry and conversations. I had him over and we had a fun evening that ended with him spanking me with a disciplinary tone and then making me go to my room and wait for him to come in and strap me with his belt. That was a very very enjoyable experience. I felt like I had been waiting my whole life for that experience. He ended up moving away, but it was a great introduction to acting on my fantasies.

How did you start doing spanking modeling?
I used to frequent the chat and message boards on what was at the time SIN, now Spanko.net. It was one of the earliest sites I found (back when it was Spanking Memories) and I went there a lot off and on over the years to talk to other spankos. The owner, Sean, was someone I chatted with there occasionally and he had told me in the past that he’d like to have me come shoot videos for the site. I never met anyone for spanking while I was married because I didn’t feel right about sneaking around, but after I found myself single we talked about it again and set up a trip to San Francisco for me to do a shoot.
 What was your first professional shoot?
It was in June of 2008 when I flew up to SF to shoot with SIN. We shot 3 fairly intense videos in 3 days. I was extremely nervous, but everyone was very nice to me and I had a lot of fun playing movie star. I had to sit on ice packs in between and have makeup applied to my butt before the last shoot. I loved it and knew this was what I wanted to do. 

“I had to sit on ice packs in between and have makeup applied to my butt before the last shoot. I loved it and knew this was what I wanted to do. “

At what point did you start producing your own content? What inspired you to start?
I had so much fun doing the videos, I was hooked and needed to keep doing it. While I couldn’t afford the expensive equipment some studios have, I still thought it was something I could do. So, I got a basic camcorder, some simple garage work lights and a tripod and just started asking if we could film it when I was going to meet someone for some spanking play. Since doing the pro shoot, I had more exposure and thus met more people to play/film with, and when Spanking Tube came out I was able to use that tool to further promote myself and the videos I made on my own. Spanking Tube was also useful for helping me make more local contacts and I started doing trade shoots with other models/producers in California. I opened my own clip store in August of 2009 and it became an official job for me. Since then, I’ve gotten to work with a lot more people of course, and also have even been able to hire other models to be in my videos as sales have grown to allow it. I now film with an HD camera and have my own domain at www.lilystarr.com where customers can choose between purchasing the individual clip downloads or a monthly streaming membership that allows unlimited viewing of my entire video library.


 What are you favorite kinds of videos to be in?
I enjoy variety, so they are all fun, but I guess my tastes still go back to those childhood fantasies and I really love Daddy/daughter disciplinary role plays the most.

 Is there a kind of video that you’ve never gotten to do but would like to someday? A location or story or theme that you’ve never had a chance to do?
I would love to film an outdoor switching scene. I’ve done outdoors, but not with a switch because I live in the desert and there aren’t a whole lot of the right type of trees when you go out to areas remote enough for filming. 
Also, I have had a fantasy forever that involves me visiting a friend who has a Dad that spanks her. I don’t get spanked at home, but my parents gave her Dad permission to discipline me if needed, and we get into trouble together during my visit for doing something dangerous and get punished together by the Dad out in their woodshed. I’ve never been spanked before in this fantasy, so it’s really scary and exciting for me. I got to act this out in private once (minus the woodshed part), but not yet on video. It’s all very detailed in my head and I’d love to film it someday given the opportunity.

What has been the most exciting part of your career as a spanking model?
Going to big parties is pretty exciting. Seeing sales orders from far away and obscure countries is exciting. Having complete strangers tell me how much they love me or how I’ve inspired them to act on their fantasies is exciting. Meeting people for private sessions who are older than I am and have been spankos since childhood but never been spanked, getting to be the first person to give them that experience is amazing. I’ve been very shy all my life, and while I still am to a point, doing this has really helped me come out of my shell and be myself, which has been really good. There are many things I find exciting about this job and that’s why I do it! I also want to take the opportunity here to thank everyone who has supported me by working with or for me, buying from my site online or vendor table at parties, hiring me, helping promote me to others, or even simply writing a nice note of encouragement. I truly appreciate it and would be nowhere without that support.

“Beauty and spankos come in all shapes, colors, and sizes, and if I can help to prove that, that makes me happy. “

One thing that I really enjoy about your productions is the fact that you have a great mix of models. In my opinion, your site has the most diverse cast in terms of both Tops and bottoms, with models from a variety of age groups, races, body types and styles. Is this intentional? Do you seek out underrepresented models, or has this just been a coincidence?

It is intentional to a degree, I wouldn’t say I seek out underrepresented models that actively, but I don’t discriminate either. Some spanking video producers will only hire a certain type of model. I have been told I am “not slender enough.” I know a lot of other women have been told the same thing, too fat, too old, whatever. I know this does not reflect what all viewers want, and since few are offering this variety I saw that the market for models not limited to the very young and very thin is wide open. I’ve had a lot of people write to tell me they really appreciate this, women because it makes them feel more confident seeing someone who looks more like them modeling, and men whose tastes vary from the mainstream because they can see what they like and often can’t find elsewhere. Not that I have anything against the more traditional model types, I obviously am happy to shoot with them too. Beauty and spankos come in all shapes, colors, and sizes, and if I can help to prove that, that makes me happy. 

 Do you have any plans or goals relating to your site? Anything we should keep an eye open for?

At this point, I’m pretty much doing what I want to do. I have had to slow down a little due to some health issues, but hope to be past all that by next year and just keep on doing my best, continually shooting new videos and working with more and more new people as well as creating more content with those I have worked well with in the past. I don’t ever want this to become stagnant. I don’t ever want to stop having fun with it. I hope I can keep finding ways to grow, improve, and have fun, and hope that passion comes through in the final product. 

 Besides Lily Starr Spanking and Alex in Spankingland, what other sites can we see you on?
I have also worked for or in association with: Spanko.net, Sarah Gregory Spanking, Spanking 101, Disciplinary Arts, Kisa Corvin’s clip store, Alicia Panettiere’s site, Beat Bottoms, Mistress Penelope St. Devi’s clip store, Marked Butts, and once made a small appearance on CameronDawn.com. I would like to work more for other sites, though my focus till now has been more on my own.

“Do it because you love it. That will show, and viewers will respond to it.”

What’s your least favorite implement to be spanked with?
The sjambok, no doubt. I consider that more of a weapon than an implement. Out of traditional implements I would probably say the bath brush, but as a spanko that’s a love/hate thing.

Do you have any advice for spanking models who are just starting out, or people who are just starting to produce their own content?
Don’t worry about what “they” think you should be, but do be aware of the way you present yourself. Keep your ego in check, if you model you will get a lot of fan love, that’s awesome but you have to stay real. Be kind to your fans. Don’t be a douche. Be respectful toward others, even those you may see as competition. This is a business, but it’s also something very personal for most of us and it’s much better for all of us and the scene if we work together and help each other out. If you’re going to produce your own content, always strive to make videos that you would enjoy watching as a spanko. Get a decent camera and make sure your scenes are well lit. Do not do faked spanking videos so you can get vanilla models or porn stars who aren’t into it to film, people can tell. But mostly, be true to yourself. Don’t do this to get rich, that’s not likely to happen in this economy. Do it because you love it. That will show, and viewers will respond to it. ♥