Before I go on to my next post, I want to address a few things. First of all, I have been pretty busy and frequently out of town, so apologize for the lapses in posting. I’ve been toying with the idea of putting my UK stories on hold and just writing about BBW, but I’ve decided to work harder at getting thru each bit the way that it happened. Also, I wrote this entire post while on the plane to New York, but I was unable to save it (since the plane was without Wifi) and ended up losing all my work, so I’ve been kind of pissed about that and avoiding rewriting. Still, time to move forward!
When I left off, we’d completed our first three videos of the day, and after lunch, we moved on to film a pair of short, straight-forward films on the infinity curve. In case you don’t know what an infinity curve is, it’s a big, white space with walls that curve in such a way that it looks like you’re sort of floating in space and that it goes on forever. I’d actually never worked on a real one before (only a seamless backdrop) so that was kind of neat. The scenes that we shot were both school scenes, and they’re very austere, so the background works wonderfully for them. The first scene was a school gym class style scene, which I loved the hell out of. Added to the list of things I didn’t know before this trip: you’re supposed to wear regular underwear beneath the navy blue gym knickers. This was not what I would have expected, but it was cool with me. Anything that involves more underwear works for me! The panties that I wore underneath were vintage and very delicate. I’d never seen anything like them before, but I liked them right away.
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| It’s hard to see the pattern, but it’s pretty 😛 |
Like I said, the scene was very straight-forward. There wasn’t really much of any story: just me getting strapped in a very austere setting. This is something that I don’t do a lot of in the films that I tend to do in the US: things that are very to-the-point, and that point is me getting whacked. This stripped down nature, plus the fact that the scenes were shot in a dreamy, blank background made it feel like we’d simply stepped into one of my fantasies and I hadn’t bothered to make up the rest of the details, so they were left out.
It was awesome.
The next scene that we did was very similar: it was the same setting and same sort of situation, but this time, it was a school scene. While all the school girl stuff is a big fantasy for me, the English version of things has always held a very strong appeal. I got to wear a tie (which I’ve never gotten to do in an American school film) and I liked that quite a bit:
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| This is a photo of me being pleased about my tie. |
The scene itself included me being bent over one of the desks from the school set and getting caned and precious little else, and it felt so potent because of that. One of the resulting images from it has become one of my favorite “Alex getting spanked” photos of all time:
It’s very much a photographic representation of that part of my kink. This was also the first time I had ever been caned in England: the first time I visited I was spanked plenty of times and hit with various objects, but I never got the cane. This event pleased me quite a bit: it just seems like something “right” to go to England and get beaten with a cane, like that’s something that every spanko bottom should get to do at least once in their lives. I’m also pleased that Paul was the person who gave me my first caning in England, as he’s gone on to become someone very special to me. Fortuitous how that worked out. 🙂
Once we finished that video, we then went on to shoot photosets, which is one of my favorite things to do. When I was just a consumer of spanking pornography, still photographs were the main thing that I was interested in. They feel artistic and creative, as well as open-ended in a way that lets the mind wander in delightful directions. Because I started out my modeling career simply being photographed, it’s also something that I feel more confident doing. We shot several sets, all on the infinity curve, because it was just that cool.
In one set, I got to wear an actual English nurse uniform (although I’m not sure if it’s modern or not? I’m somewhat confused on that). It’s super different from anything that I’ve ever seen in the U.S. Usually nurses just wear scrubs around here, and there’s nothing attractive about scrubs, at least to me. This involved leggings, though, and they were tight enough that you could see my underwear through them, which makes for a win in my book.
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| Thank you for spanking me, Mr. Osborne! |
In another set, there was more caning, of course, because one can never have enough of that! Zoe had to help me with the “suspender belt” (garter belt) since I’d never really worn one before, but I discovered that I’m actually quite fond of them. Less pulling up stockings, more having something to frame my ass and make it look even rounder!
The next photo comes from a set which was cute and sweet, and which I like a ton. Pink bow + snuggly spankings = happy, contended Alex. Here is a photo to prove it:
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| Whenever I see any one of these photos, I think “Oh! That one is my favorite!” until I get to the next one, which also becomes my favorite. |
The final set that we did at the end of the first day of filming involves me looking very young and sweet and Paul coming in to be all scary and terrifying. I kept insisting that he was a very bad man for beating such an innocent looking girl as myself. 😛
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| Yeah, having the same problem, because this one is also my favorite. |
Once we finished shooting and we got everything cleaned up and packed away for the day, we drove to a small grocery store to get some supplies (read: alcohol) for the evening. Zoe once again demonstrated her very impressive patience when I wanted to get some chocolate but didn’t know what any of it was. She walked thru the entire candy aisle explaining things to me and helping me figure out what stuff I would like. She then bought me my first ever Easter Egg. Now, we obviously have Easter chocolate in the US, and we have a lot of candy that is shaped like eggs, but we don’t have the exact same thing as they do in England. In England, Easter Eggs are big, foil wrapped chocolate eggs with something interesting inside them, and I guess they’re sort of a tradition. Zoe and I got two, and some pink fizz (I think that the name of that is pretty self explanatory, right? Pink sparkling wine) and planned to have a picnic with them in our room later that night.
We then went to a restaurant near our hotel, where I had to take a very long time deliberating over what I wanted to eat again. I’d like to say that I got better at this as my time in England wore on, but I really didn’t. Even once I knew what I liked to eat, I still had to think about it for far longer than I should have. Dinner was very enjoyable, though. It mostly involved Paul, John, Zoe, the cameraman and I chatting about all sorts of industry related topics, including a lot of the history of the various sites that film in England. We stayed there for a long time, and I felt relaxed and happy. At one point, Zoe and I went to the restroom (in a pair, as girls do) and when she turned on the sink to wash her hands, she sprayed water all over herself. She then attempted to dry the front of her jeans using a hand dryer. I took a photo of this, because this is the kind of stuff that I absolutely dig about Zoe. She’s goofy and ridiculous and I simply cannot get enough of her.
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After we finished at the restaurant, we walked over to a pub and had a few drinks. I will not say anything about anyone else (although John was pretty open on his blog about the fact that he his fair share to drink) but I was very responsible. It was also just a very nice time. I find going out for drinks in England to be more fun than it is in the US, but that may be because I live in South Dakota, where nothing is particularly exciting.
Once last call had been completed, we all wandered back to the hotel, where Zoe and I went on to eat chocolate and drink wine the pink fizz before falling asleep.
Morning came, of course, far earlier than I would have liked it to. Mornings are a real problem for me. I’m just not cut out for them. Sleeping until 1:00 makes me happiest. This is obviously by no means practical in any part of adult society, so I adapt and deal with it. But when Zoe’s alarm went off to summon us to breakfast, we unanimously decided to text the guys and let them know that we were going to sleep in. Besides, I didn’t want to see Breakfast Lady again, anyway.
Sleep vs. Getting Scolded. I wonder what wins?!
Eventually, we did get up and get ourselves put together, then we packed up the rest of our things. I had literally all of my luggage with me, so I had quite a few things to pack, since I have this tendency to kind of dig through my suitcase in search of something and end up throwing things everywhere (see also: my hotel room at every spanking party I’ve ever attended). When we did come downstairs, though, Breakfast Lady managed to give me a disapproving look. Apparently she had made some comments about my lack of breakfast consumption to John and Paul earlier. Her life must not be very exciting.
Eventually, we did get up and get ourselves put together, then we packed up the rest of our things. I had literally all of my luggage with me, so I had quite a few things to pack, since I have this tendency to kind of dig through my suitcase in search of something and end up throwing things everywhere (see also: my hotel room at every spanking party I’ve ever attended). When we did come downstairs, though, Breakfast Lady managed to give me a disapproving look. Apparently she had made some comments about my lack of breakfast consumption to John and Paul earlier. Her life must not be very exciting.
We then returned to the cold… I mean, to the studio, where we began my fourth consecutive day of shooting, this time for Triple A. The day began on the infinity curve again, with a sort of straight forward, introductory spanking.
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| Fun fact: that t-shirt is the one that I was wearing the very first time I got spanked, when I was eighteen. Nostalgia central! |
It was a pretty nice spanking, and a good way to warm up for the day, so I was pretty pleased with it. When that was filmed, we moved on to start shooting some POV scenes for John’s new site: POV Spanking. This stuff was a little bit more challenging to shoot, as it felt very unnatural to me. The idea of POV (point-of-view) is that it appears like the person watching the film is seeing what he would actually be seeing where he the one giving the spanking. This makes for a lot of non-traditional filming. I had to talk directly to the camera without hearing any lines back, and that just felt very awkward and difficult for me to time. I’ve been told that I did a pretty good job, though, so I hope that’s the case. We shot a number of these scenes, experimenting with different positions and implements, as well as filming styles. I urge you all to go check out the clips if that’s something that you’re interested in. 🙂
It’s getting late, so I’ll continue this story in the next post.
I’ve covered an entire day! Winner! 😛
While the action of this story takes place in Vegas, it begins in a very different time and place.
It was one of those evenings where I was alone in my apartment in South Dakota and Malignus was working. Both my professional work and my chores were completed for the evening, so I was sitting on the computer chatting to people and using Fetlife.
Recently, my darling twinsie, ellee, had been to a party in New York where she had met and played with Richard Windsor. From the very onset of my experience on Fetlife, Richard had been one of my favorite people. I liked his sense of humor, his ability to start a good discussion and his attitude towards play. I had been aware of him and his blog for longer than I’d been active in the virtual community, and I was delighted by how lovely he seemed online. We had met for the first time during Shadowlane, but unfortunately I was super overbooked at that party and didn’t get to see half of the people that I wanted to. It also seemed to me that Rich was the kind of person who preferred pre-negotiated play over the “Hey, I’m here! Wanna spank me for the next ten minutes before I leave again?” sort of thing, which is really what most of my play at Shadowlane ended up being. After having our rather short meeting, though, my desire to actually get to scene with him had intensified, and listening to ellee talk about how amazing her experience had been brought this back to the front of my mind.
I wanted to engage, but more specifically, I wanted to show my interest in a bantery, fun, spank-flirty way. This is something that I’m not good at. My preference is to be a good girl, sometimes even doing so excessively to the point of being annoying to others around me. I know that in my regular home life, I’m never going to be intentionally bratty, but I also know that there’s a time and an audience for it and that it can be incredibly entertaining. The idea of having fun first and then getting spanked later sounded rather perfect for me. So I decided to wait for a window of opportunity and then try my hand at it.
It just so happened that the night in question, The Spanking World: Good vs. Bad was having a field day, and I happily joined in, joking and bantering. A few days/weeks before that, Rich had started a topic in the group, but when no one replied for a while, he took it down. He explained this in a post elsewhere in the group: “No one responded for 43 minutes, so I figured no one was going to and deleted it.” (this is paraphrased. I cannot find the actual post anymore). This lead to lots of teasing and hilarity Later that evening, I posted a new set of self-taken photos:
I was pretty pleased with the photo set, but despite the fact that lots of people were active on Fetlife, I wasn’t getting any comments. I then made the following post to the famous “Pet Peeves” thread:
And then there was…
To which I responded:
Rich then commented on my photo, and I waited for exactly 43 minutes before replying to his comment. I literally sat next to my computer with a timer and waited. I was on a roll, and I was quite sure that everyone thought I was hilarious.
Really, it should have stopped there, but I was drunk with the glory of my new-found ability to draw spankings to myself in a hilarious manner, so I kept referring to the 43 minute rule and calling Richard a little bitch whenever I got the chance, and it probably got legitimately annoying. This was something that I originally really didn’t want: I just wanted it to be funny and then for me to get beaten over it, and there were signs that I was actually becoming irritating (maybe even offensive?) later on, so I decided to lay low until the Vegas party, which I successfully did. My biggest fear in this whole out of character, behavior experiment was that I would actually hurt someone’s feelings, create a nuisance or make someone think less of me, and I did worry that I had pushed things too far at the end.
Still, whenever anyone asked me about the story, I was happy to tell the entire thing, and I was quite pleased with myself. Rich had made it quite clear to me what the consequences for my actions were to be by sending me a series of voice recordings that were specifically designed to make my heart pound and my stomach flutter, I think. I was going to get 12 strokes of the cane, and after each stroke, I would need to repeat my most inappropriate phrase before the next. I let myself get enjoyably worked up over this. The anticipation built and built, and when we arrived at the party, Richard told me that I would be getting my caning on Sunday so that I got the maximum time to wait and think about things.
I ended up having to discuss practical concerns, which are my least favorite things when dealing with spanking play. I want to be able to just do whatever the fuck that I want, whenever I want. That’s the way the world works, right? Unfortunately, this is not always the case. I was leaving from Vegas to go to England and would be filming in just a few days after arriving, so I couldn’t leave the party all beaten and battered looking. This was also a concern in my play with YS: I had to ask him not to mark me during our last scene together, even though I really wanted him to. I wanted YS to spank me super hard and long and to leave me feeling sore and looking bruised so that I would continue to be enveloped in the safety and love of the time that we’d spent together. As it was, I wasn’t able to get that, exactly, although all of our play together over the weekend left me with very positive memories, and the combination of everyone’s efforts meant that I was very sore while flying to England. Anyway, I was worried that I would be in bad condition by Sunday and would not be able to be caned, and on Saturday night I was feeling a bit tired and emotionally stretched thin and I wasn’t going to be able to put my heart into the scene if we did it then. Richard and I talked about all this, and we decided that I would be fine to get caned on Sunday before I had to leave. I set aside more time than we would probably actually need for it, just in case, and to avoid rushing. I think because of my temporary anti-marking agenda I may not have been caned as hard as I possibly could have, but because this was our first real scene together, I was somewhat alright with that.
On Sunday morning I took my time getting up and getting dressed and then spent some final private time focusing on my D/s dynamic with YS. Then it was time to go to “Strick”Dave’s spanking court. When we left our room to talk down to the main suite, YS held his hand out for me to take and ended up feeling like I was in middle school or something. It was the sweetest gesture, and it made me feel a giddy, girly feeling inside. When we got to court, it had already started so we sort of snuck into the back. Court is always hilarious, and I have huge respect for (and probably a bit of a spanko-crush on) Dave: he seems to be knowledgable about everything, always quick to respond, makes me laugh lots and has just flat out impressive spanking skills. I was involved in one court case: in which Whooperine charged me with making fun of him for eating chicken wings with a fork. I did not even bother trying to defend myself against this, because several people had seen me say this, so I just argued that what I said wasn’t so much mockery as it was fact. I may have been found guilty and gotten ten strokes, but I think that I sufficiently was able to make court a venue for further Whooperine-teasing, which meant that everything was right with the world. Throughout all these proceedings, though, I had a funny feeling in my tummy. Richard had handed me a note when I first came in that instructed me to go to my room after court and stand in the corner and wait for him. He was dressed sharply and had a very serious look on his face all the way through the court proceedings. His unbudging nature made me get even more worked up over what was about to happen. I had the classic mixture of terror and excitement. It was an excellent state of being.
As soon as I finished my case, I told Richard that I was going to my room then, in the interest of time (or maybe he told me to? I don’t remember this part too well). What I do remember well is the walk down the hallway towards my suite. I had just walked this path with YS less than hour ago, practically skipping gleefully and then, it had seemed extremely short. Now, it stretched on and on in front of me. It was dizzyingly long! I found myself pausing to wipe my hands off on my skirt, because they were sweating. “How big is this hotel?” I wondered to myself. “I feel like I’ve been walking for an hour.”
I finally arrived in the room and I propped the door open so that Richard would be able to enter when he came in. I then went pretty directly into the corner and began to wait. I could hear my blood rushing around inside my ears and hear my heart beating. I was very detached from my regular self and simply existing in this moment. My world was a world where I’d been a badly behaved girl and I was going to be soundly, severely punished for it. Thump, Thump, Thump went my heart.
Finally, Richard appeared and called me out of the corner. I’m sure my face must have been pretty pathetic: I was literally quivering. His manner in addressing me was stern and unbending and it made all my other feelings even more intense. I didn’t protest against anything, just quietly submitted to getting into position for the cane. When he tested it in the air, I gasped at just the sound. From the time that the caning began until maybe ten minutes afterwards, I was in a liminal space on the verge of crying. Richard had said that he expected that I may cry, so I knew that was acceptable. For whatever reason, though, I never actually did: I think that I had too much nervous energy, too much anticipation and adrenaline to actually get to tears. Besides, I don’t think that I’ve ever cried the first time that someone gave me a serious spanking (with the exception of my very first spanking). I think it’s sort of an usual space for me, and my brain doesn’t know which part of the mixed set of emotions to respond to.
Richard had positioned me over a barstool, in basically the same position that YS had used, but while yesterday’s spanking had felt warm and close, this one felt austere and formal. It pushed a whole different (and much rarer to be pushed) set of buttons for. I was given a piece of paper which read “MR. WINDSOR IS NOT A LITTLE BITCH” which I was to recite after each stroke (this paper is currently tucked in my wallet behind my credit cards, which I suppose could prove awkward at some point, but I don’t want to lose it). The first stroke made me gasp and whimper. I had trouble getting my voice in order to speak to read the sentence. I think I may have actually moved my mouth without any sound coming out, like trying to bring myself to wake someone sleeping in a dark room when my mind believes that it is necessary to be entirely quiet.
“Mr. Windsor is not a little bitch,” I managed. The cane landed again, in a hot, stinging stroke. Again, I repeated the sentence. On the third stroke, I had a moment of fear when I realized that I was only a quarter of the way done with the caning. Just like the hallway had before, twelve strokes seemed impossibly long. The scene had gotten into some deep part of my brain and had twisted my senses of time and distance. It felt like a very long time before the next stroke.
Sometimes, I would rush the sentence out quickly. Others, I would whimper and wail a bit, catch my breath, move my feet and then whisper. At one point, I apologized, but I was firmly reminded that it was not the time for that. When I finally read the sentence for the last time and received my final stroke, I felt like I had been in the scene for ages, when in reality, I can’t imagine that it took more than ten minutes between the first and last stroke. Each one had been memorable, though: they cut, they bit, they slashed, they buzzed and itched and chewed at me. When it was done, I was suffering from “No bones syndrome” and sort of poured myself onto the couch in a snuggling position with Richard.
We talked a bit and I felt very relieved and relaxed. The whole thing had been such an intense and powerful situation that it took me a little bit to sort of “come to” from it, but when I did, I was very happy with the whole experience. We hugged and everything was forgiven.
I feel very certain that I will never call Richard a little bitch ever, ever again. ♥
Since I recently shot my School Strokes interview at Real Spankings, I uploaded a couple of the photos to my Fetlife profile. I tend to do this: I like to show off what I’ve been up to, and I get to direct attention towards the awesome companies that I’m lucky enough to work with.
The inclusion of these caning photos sparked a small conversation: do I like being caned or not? I gave the shortest answer I could possibly give, since this conversation was being conducted via photo comments: “I have a love/hate relationship with the cane.” I guess this didn’t answer people’s questions. I got several private messages asking me to explain what, exactly, that means. I’m choosing to do so here. 🙂
For one thing, caning is a lower proximity activity than an OTK spanking and is therefore less comforting to me. This is not to say that it is uncomfortable. It just doesn’t carry the same warm, safe feeling that being OTK gives me. Caning also has trouble escaping its formal roots, and it doesn’t lend itself to being relaxing because of this. These things place caning farther away from the circle of comfort for me and therefore, for more intense caning scenes, requires a greater amount of trust in my partner.
There’s also the fact that caning lends itself well to intensity and, even when not done severely, it is usually paced in a way that feels concentrated and deliberate. The pacing does a lot for me. It makes each stroke very significant. It slows the world down, and can make a time frame of less than a minute in which six strokes are delivered feel like a very long time.
Canes hurt in a very unique way. They tend to build. A few seconds after the initial impact, there’s that second, deeper pain. Individual strokes feel like pinching or biting combined with a bit of a punch instead of the traditional stinging, swatting, burning feeling of small headed implements like hairbrushes or wooden spoons (the implements that I favor) or the “knocks the wind out of you,” full bodied pain which accompanies a thuddy implement like a frat paddle. Cane strokes often create welts, which may take longer to heal and which hold in the pain for a while in a way that is different than other spankings.
Is all this good or bad? Why can’t you just answer the question, Alex?
It’s both. I feel my heart in my chest when someone that I enjoy being spanked by instructs me to get a cane, or when he holds one menacingly between his hands, flexing it and taunting me. I’ve been brought to tears simply by the sound of a cane being whooshed back and forth or colliding with the mattress as a demonstration. It scares me. It intimidates me. With someone I know and trust, I like that. I like how much I don’t like the way a caning feels. I like being instructed to get into position for an implement that I’d never in a thousand years select for myself if I was given a set of choices. I like it when it pleases Malignus to cane me. He went on a “kick” for a particular cane at one point, and would grab me and bring me into the bedroom for it multiple times a day, just arbitrarily, because he liked hitting me with it. As much as I didn’t actually enjoy the caning (it often brought tears to my eyes), I loved how much he was enjoying doing it. Getting something which sort of scares me, which sort of pushes boundaries, which wouldn’t be my first choice makes me feel wonderfully submissive. The afterglow of a caning is always filled with adrenaline, some level of endorphines and pride.
Another think which I actually like about caning is its ability to overwhelm me. This is something I’ve talked about before. I like it, in certain contexts, when a spanking can overwhelm me and push me beyond my usual level of resistance. I like feeling all my energy used up. I like feeling the fight go out of me. Especially when used after other implements, hard cane strokes can really do this to me. In fact, two of my most significant subspace experiences involved caning, and I’m forever appreciative towards cane-kind for that.
So, in summary, it’s both. Yes, I’ve stomped my foot and thrown a big protest at the announcement that I was going to be caned, and no, I can’t think of a time when I said “You know what I’d like? The cane!” but at the same time, I have nothing but warm feelings… especially those coming in the form of lines.
Head over to Real Spankings to see my interview for more cane-conversation. ♥
Updated 12/21/14: I’ve been re-reading some older blog posts and I came across this one. I want to add a little bit of modern commentary on it, now that I have a perspective from outside of that relationship.
My relationship with Malignus was my first D/s relationship. I had a sort of unformed relationship that involved discipline before that and a play partner, but never a Dominant. I actually didn’t know very much about D/s when I got involved in it, and most of what I knew I was taught by Malignus. At the time that I wrote this, I believed that in order to be a “good” submissive and to “fully” submit, I had to be able to take very severe spankings without warmups, with minimal encouragement, without moving or crying out to any degree and without the necessity of aftercare.
I now don’t think that this is actually a particularly healthy way to approach scenes, and I don’t want anyone new to D/s or to spanking who might read this to think that this kind of play is normative or something that should be strived for. Please read this with the understanding that this scene had aspects of it that were very positive for me, but took place within the framework of an unhealthy relationship. My emphasis on fear of disappointing someone makes me feel sad when I re-read this. It has taken me a long time to get the idea out my head that my natural reactions to things are not something that will disappoint people.
The rest of the text of this post has been left intact with no changes made to the text except this addition.
This afternoon, Malignus decided to give me a spanking. There wasn’t an established atmosphere for it: it simply began with “Let’s hit you with stuff!” He started the spanking with a wooden spoon named Warren (the implement which featured heavily in this very old post and which I thought I lost once). It’s certainly not a kind implement. Once upon a time, I had designated my three least favorite implements as “The Trinity of Terror: Warren, a small bladed but very thick lexan paddle and the nylon cane.
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| The Trinity of Terror, shown with Zelda, which is not relevant to this post. The other three items very much are. |
The spanking started off slowly, but I met it with some level of resistance. I don’t mean I thrashed around or protested or anything extreme, but I let my body be tense, I moved around on the bed a bit and I continually cried out into the pillow. I leaned my body away from Malignus. My hands grabbed at the far end of the mattress in a tense desperation. There are a lot of different ways in which a spanking can go, and recently, for arbitrary or re-affirmative style spankings, we’ve been working on me meeting them passively and fully submitting to the spanking. This isn’t the way that I generally react with other Tops, or in other atmospheres, but it’s an important area that we’ve been working on. It’s certainly been a challenge for me, though.
The spanking was very painful in a fiery, stinging way. The small surface area made one little section take all the force, and then another, and then another. At one point, I did something which is somewhat unusual for me during a spanking and I said something cogent: “This hurts!”
“Yes,” Malignus acknowledged. “It does. But it’s going to hurt less when you stop fighting against it. Let it break you down.”
I tried to do exactly that, but I was just spinning my wheels. I got into a bit of a groove for a while, being still and keeping my body fairly relaxed. Malignus praised me for this, but I didn’t really keep it up. The spanking picked up pace, and I found myself back to a state of struggle against the pain that was building. After things reached a crescendo, Malignus stopped and I took several deep breaths.
I’m going to digress for a moment. I’m willing to bet that you guys have seen Lord of the Rings: The Return of the King. The first time I saw that movie, I really started needing to pee about halfway through. Unfortunately, the movie didn’t feel like it was about halfway through. It felt like it was almost over. I figured I could just wait until it ended. The movie would seem like it was about to end, and then start to seem like it was wrapping itself up, and then it would GO ON TO SOMETHING ELSE. Then that would wrap itself up, it would seem to be about over and then it would GO ON TO SOMETHING ELSE. Near the end I was becoming infinitely frustrated. I just wanted it to quit fake ending and just ACTUALLY END. In a movie, those moments that suggest that something is almost over when it really isn’t are one of my pet peeves. They make me crazy. (By the way, I totally adore LOTR and I’m really excited to see The Hobbit this weekend. kthnx!)
In a spanking, however, those moments when you think that things are almost over and start to prepare yourself for them to be done, only to find out that you’re closer to halfway through have a really strong, positive effect on me. They make me feel out of control in a very safe and very good way. The length and intensity of my spanking is not being determined by me. That’s entirely up to my Dominant. It puts me in a very secure and submissive state of mind, and speeds up the process of breaking down my resistance. In my head, I call spankings that seem to stop, or appear to be reaching their end, only to begin again in earnest “Lord of the Rings spankings” because of the above story. (Note– I realize I’m going to probably start getting some strange search terms showing up on my google analytics because of this).
Returning to my original story, that’s what happened today. Malignus did, indeed, set down Warren. He had completed spanking me with it, just as I had originally believe. Instead of ending the spanking (which, if I was being honest with myself, I did not really want anyway) he reached under the bed and returned with the small, Lexan paddle pictured above. That paddle hurts a lot. It’s one of the worst things I’ve been spanked with. I tried to be submissive to it, and to let it push me. Instead, I think that my resistance began to intensify (I say “I think” because this is the area of the spanking where my memory starts to get a little bit fuzzy, even though it was just eight hours ago or something). After giving me a handful of swats on my bottom, Malignus tapped the paddle against my thigh. I know that he does not do this to “line up his shot” like some people do. The purpose of pre-swat tapping has always been to get inside my head. I felt very vulnerable for the second before that stroke landed on my thigh, and then I felt a surge of pain that seemed to run through my entire body. And then another. And then another. And then another. I was really reacting to the pain, vocalizing and crying out in a manner that was probably excessive. Despite feeling wonderfully loved and taken care of, and being very aware of how much of my stress was dissipating, I was certainly not reaching my goal of calm and quiet submission. Then, for a minute, it was over.
I was actually quite relieved on some level when Malignus grabbed another implement. I knew that I wanted to give myself over to the spanking more, and I would have been very disappointed in my performance at that if it had stopped there. The implement which he had selected, however, was my nemesis: the nylon cane. I don’t know if he intentionally used the three implements that I once selected as my least favorites or if it just worked out that way, but it was something that didn’t even cross my mind until much later. At the moment, all I was aware of was the fact that I was going to be caned.
He did so rapidly, at a pace that I was largely unfamiliar with. He wasn’t using “full” strokes, but the combined effective was overpowering. At first, I continued to struggle and cry out and then, all the sudden, everything stopped. I don’t mean that the caning stopped– it continued at the same pace and intensity. I stopped. My resistance went away and I just lay perfectly still. I fell silent.
“Good girl,” Malignus praised me. “VERY good.”
The caning continued, as did my passive state. It still hurt, but I was experiencing something which I’ve had limited experiences with: a powerful rush of endorphins. I have no idea for how long things continued. In my mind, it was both very long and very short. I felt really, really good. It was different than the drug-like experience I’d had the first time I fell into subspace, but equally wonderful. I felt entirely relaxed, but I also felt a joyful exuberance in my chest. I was really aware of what was happening to me and I was proud and excited. I felt simultaneously tranquilized and hyper stimulated. My brain was very confused, and it was awesome. Awesome, awesome, awesome.
Once things finally did stop, Malignus rubbed my back and comforted me for a long time. The good feeling lingered.
The spanking was still not entirely over.
After I was able to speak properly again (although I don’t remember what I said), Malignus got one more cane– a 1″ acrylic cane that is probably the most weight bearing cane in our collection (strike that, known to man). He gave me six strokes with it, and while I wasn’t entirely silent, I still took them well and felt the same surge of good feelings. After that, he gave me a really lovely cool down. Hours later, I’m still a little bit sore, and I’m still very smiley about it.
♥
I’ve had a problem ever since TASSP.
I’ve wanted to write about other things, but I’ve felt guilty because there was so much that I *could* write about from TASSP, so I’ve insisted that I won’t write about anything else until TASSP has been completed. Now, we’re left a month after the party with very few posts to my blog since it indeed, only one short installment of the tale completed and several significant things, such as my very exciting Mad Scientist Roleplay Scenario and my twenty fifth birthday entirely unmentioned.
I really love blogging, but I’ve been disappointingly without discipline with regards to it recently, and the longer I go without writing, the harder it is to start again, especially when it seems like every entry I’m promising to do better at it and then not writing the next day. I had a long conversation with Scotchgrove tonight, part of which focused on this not blogging business. He decided that due to my current schedule, I should be able to post to my blog daily, and he’s decided to hold me to this standard (remember, he is The Boss of Me).
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| For those who may have been confused |
So, in order to get the ball rolling on this new dedication to posting every day, I’m going to start to finish telling you about TASSP. Honestly, it’s been a bit of time, and I don’t really remember the order in which everything happened, so it may just be my best approximation in that regard. I’d also like to add that it’s going on 3:00 AM while I’m writing this and I’m suffering from insomnia, so it’s likely that this won’t be my most clear or articulate post.
Following the naughty school girl party, I had planned to do a mass school girl shoot with my very excellent friend, Ten Amorette, her partner and another excellent friend, drlectr and a gaggle of amazing spanking models. Unfortunately, I arrived to this shoot somewhat late due to a failure to communicate about when, exactly, the naughty school girl party ended, since I ducked out with Heather to make sure that she was all set for her shoot and stuff (alright, because I was a bit attached at the hip with her after having not seen her for a month. She is, after all, my best friend!) and I ended up being somewhat late. I arrived to find that the filming had already started. This was easily taken care of, however. The plot of the scene involved a group of girls getting busted for having a keg and drinking in their room, and so my character simply walked in looking for the beer, only to find a very angry principal yielding a paddle. The fact that I never got to taste any of that beer didn’t excuse me from getting a series of hard swats!
I love filming with a large group of models because we all start playing off each other and one thing leads to another. It becomes full of energy and very authentic. I also love filming with Ten, because she’s pretty much the most fun person ever, and she constantly cracks me up with her antics when she’s in character. This video will be being released for free, so once it is, I’ll make mention of it here and give you lovely people a link. It’s certainly something worth watching (probably again, and again, and again).
Later that night, I attended a dinner during which mashed potatoes were served in martini glasses (which was a bit confusing but still quite delicious) and my dinner entertainment included watching Amelia Jane Rutherford get a paddling. “The English girls” (as people tended to refer to Pandora and Amelia) were very fascinated with the American style paddles– in England, most people’s definition of a paddle is some lovely leather thing, and the two of them seemed very eager to get the “American cultural experience” of being spanked with an awful wooden one. As a brief side note, I find it rather interesting that the traditional English implements have very little room for “thud”: the only thing that I can think of which seems to be popular over there and thuddy are those awful, ebony hairbrushes (which, as far as I’m concerned, England may keep, and there must be some sort of International Spanking Ordinance that protects me from awful things like that when I’m abroad). Amelia appeared quite impressed with the Spencer paddling that she received over dinner, and the more I saw of her, the more impressed I became with Amelia herself.
Sometime after dinner, I wound up in Tubaman’s suite, wherein there was a mountain of implements laying on the table which were to be sold at the vendor faire the next day, but which were available to be tested until then. Malignus and I had some fun digging through the pile to find unusual things, which he then gave me a few solid whacks with. This endeavor started out with him procuring a wooden sword and giving me a quick spanking with it. I was incredibly surprised by how much it hurt, and I think I made a rather excessive amount of noise about it. I got spanked with a number of different materials and unusual pervertables, including a neoprene tube (despite my insistence that I’ve somehow developed an allergy to the substance), a few unusual canes, a pyrex paddle and a fan blade. The most interesting thing that we found in the pile, however, was a real, rhino-skin sjambok. It was very different than the rubber monstrosity which is currently resting under my bed as I write this. It was much shorter and much more dense, but of an equal level of flexibility. Malignus did not lay into me with it and used quite a bit of care when he gave me a sample of it, but I still found it to be quite formidable. Still, it was an exciting thing to be able to tell people I’ve experienced!
I spent the majority of the evening in Ten’s suite, as my I recall, where I got spanked by a number of awesome people. drlectr also gave me a nice, long, OTK lotioning, which sent me into a very snuggly and sleepy place. I was actually quite amazed by how relaxed I felt that first night. The world seemed to be moving at a million miles a minute around me, I’d just been spanked by people whose names I couldn’t even remember, I’d booked myself an extremely full day starting in the morning and I was surrounded by people that I didn’t quite know but wanted to know. None the less, I felt as if I hadn’t a care in the world. My spanko shame was nearly entirely gone. I lay there with my bottom bare and reddened for an entire party worth of people to see, and all I felt was good. My bottom was, after the lotion, the perfect combination of sore and soothed, and I felt incredibly safe in my vulnerability.
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| This was taken after I came back to the room. |
That evening, as I prepared for bed, Malignus called me over for my bedtime spanking. Pillows were already laid out on the bed from other scening, so I grabbed my special face pillow and plopped over them. I was very surprised to see him approaching me with a short, delring cane. I’m sure I scrunched my face at him. “But Mallliiiiiiiigggnuuuuus!” I said, “bedtime spankings aren’t supposed to be mean. And besides, I’m shooting tomorrow! I can’t have cane stripes!” Malignus promised me that he did not intend to mark me, and I knew that I had every reason in the world to trust him. He began to spank me in a style which I can only call tapping. He moved the cane back and forth very quickly but without ever giving a full stroke. It was very snappy, though, and even though minimal force was being used, the delrin stung, and I soon found myself crying out. After a few moments of this, though, it became pleasantly percussive, and I relaxed into it. It reinforced the safe, sleepy feeling I had experienced earlier, and while it didn’t send me to subspace (I don’t have the right visas to enter under casual circumstances, it seems), it did fill me with a lovely dose of endorphins. This was a neat new experience, as I’d never had a relaxing caning before. After that, I snuggled into bed with my head on Malignus’ chest and fell asleep, excited to wake up to a series of new adventures in the morning.
*NOTE* This is a very photos-of-my-butt heavy post. If you don’t like photos of my butt, you should probably not read my blog or hang out with me.
During my very brief hiatus (in which I struggled with new work hours, health issues and chronic insomnia to the point where I think I was bordering on having the actual medical condition of exhaustion) I wasn’t keeping track of who was paying attention to me on the internet. This is very unlike me and yet another sign that things weren’t going well for me. Fortunately, despite the fact that I had a 15 hour status migranous earlier and the fact that the “L” key on my laptop is headed the way of the comma and period (that is to say, the land of malfunction) and that’s a huge bother because I have to type L every time I write my fricken name, I’m in a good mood today and I’m ready to sort through where I’ve been in my own absence. I also have this giant bowl of ice cream to help:
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| Ok- it’s mostly fruit. Still remarkable. |
Clare Fonda uploaded the content from our awesome shoot when I was visiting LA to Girl Spanks Girl, which is very exciting indeed! This shoot brought me my very first galleries of free spanking photos, which is pretty cool, and therefore, lots of people have been posting about it.
Spanking.su posted a blog post about it with a link to two galleries of me. Apparently the fact that I got my mouth washed out with soap was rather noteworthy and enjoyed by a number of people (one of those people was not me, but I suppose that’s the point.) It’s not something I do in my personal life, but it certainly lent itself well to the theme of the story and I had no problem doing it for the video.
Domestic Spanking Blog did a write up that featured similar mouth soaping photos. Again, I guess people like it!
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| I like my concerned face and the socks best about this photo! |
Spank Badass had a couple of posts about me, as well. I enjoy hearing reviews which mention that I’m used to pain because I’m rather proud of/obsessed with my own tolerance. They posted this photo of me and Clare, which seems to be pretty popular. I’ve got this kind of wincing smile, probably because it “hurts so good.”
Femdom Destiny features photos from another set that we did that day. I’m wearing a bow in my hair in these that was made for me by one of my all time best friends, ellee. ^_^
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| Again with the worried face! |
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| OK! I had reason to be worried! |
Amateur OTK Spanking Blog wrote about another set that I did– one that I particularly liked because it involved pajamas which are simply the coziest thing to be spanked while wearing.
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| SAD FACE! |
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| With good reason! |
I’m now featured on the Clare Fonda Pass models page, and I’m kind of in love with my doe-eyed expression there.
On a note unrelated to my shoot with Clare, Spanking Fetish Clips has a bit about my most recent shoot with Assume the Position Studios and my fun, Hunger Games Spanking Fan Fiction video that I filmed along with Christy Cutie. If you haven’t checked that out, you should!
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| Christy and I being adorable friendsies pre-spanking |
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| My lovely bottom in its most natural of states! |
Finally, I only recently became aware of the fact that my Chelsea Spanks… shoot is available on DVD now! I’m partnered with Mei Mara. In case you’ve forgotten how awesome that shoot was, here’s a refresher:
If I were you, I would buy that.
Finally, my friend over at The Spanking Resource has a piece about the Spankingtube preview of my newest video with Lily Starr Spanking. I really appreciate the attention! I’ll be posting a lot more about that video soon.
That’s all I could track down about myself! I hope you guys are as excited as I was about all the new content!
When Heather, Malignus and I were in Los Angeles, we attended an event called Bizarre Bazar. There were a bunch of vendors and lots of fun, kinky events. At the vendor fair, Heather picked out her first personal implement: a green, acrylic cane made by Rods by Rane, an implement seller local to California.
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| Photo from Rods by Rane’s site |
The cane is very pretty, and it seems to vary intensities quite well. It’s also a good mid-length cane: a bit long for OTK, but easy to get locational accuracy and use in smaller spaces. Because it’s acrylic and not particularly long, it’s one of the most “stern” or rigid canes that we’ve used (aside from bamboo and thicker lexan canes). It has a deep, penetrating, straight-to-the-bone kind of cutting, thuddy pain when used with a lot of force. When the Top wants it to be, it can be one of more intimidating implements. When used lightly, it can be relaxingly percussive or fall into the area of “almost nice”.
Here’s a photo after 30 strokes I received from Malignus:
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| The bruise on the left was caused by a paddling I received the day before. |
As my good friend Maddy can attest, (since she has a rod from them as well, affectionately known as “the blue thing”) these canes are killer when used on thighs.
Heather’s original cane broke when Malignus was giving me a beating with it, but when I emailed Rane about it, he was extremely personable and friendly. He sent a replacement piece, along with a thin, more flexible, stingy cane in pink acrylic to make up for the trouble. The thinner cane is ridiculously stingy. It takes minimal effort for a Top to snap it back and forth in a way that makes it look like little is happening, but feels like you are being stung by a lot of bees.
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| Photo from Rods by Rane’s Site |
We used the green cane in our St. Patrick’s day caning video. I’d absolutely recommend the 1/2 inch canes for anyone who wants a nice, mid length, versatile acrylic cane. The color selection is great and you can find ones that fit various holidays or themes like we did in the video. The thinner, 3/8 inch cane needs to be used properly to be effective: using it like a heavier cane or with too much momentum would probably cause it to break. It doesn’t require much effort or force, but would be ideal for Tops with finesse in their spanking style.
Rods by Rane’s site also sells acrylic bundles to be used for sensation play and spiral canes. I’ve seen these “Unicorn Horn” style canes a few places and I’ve been curious about them, but I’ve yet to give them a try. They’re very pretty to look at, though! It’s a very specialized store: they only sell pieces made of acrylic and they only sell rods/canes/bundles. No paddles in their line up. It’s not exactly one-stop-shopping for all your beating needs, but if you’re looking for what they offer, it’s definitely a place to check out.
Sometime after what shall forever be referred to as “The Bunny Incident,” YS, Ten, Drlectr and Malignus were hanging out with ellee and I in the downstairs common area (AKA “ellee and Alex’s Coloring Area”) and more spanking fun was had. I have trouble identifying the order of events at this point, but there were several very fun scenes: at one point, ellee, Ten and I were in a row bent over the pool table as Malignus and YS spanked us with their belts. They both have very well-worn belts, and they were using them in a most enjoyable way (that is to say, not murdering us!) and as one of them worked their way down the line, the three of us yelped like some kind of cute musical instrument.
I think next was when Ten spanked ellee, taking her “being spanked by a girl” cherry. That was an adorable scene, and I really enjoyed watching Ten’s toppy side. She was supposedly spanking ellee for taking 90 seconds too long to get YS a beer earlier in the afternoon, and she made her count to 90 strokes, but she kept losing count and those in the audience kept tricking her into saying lower numbers. At one point, Ten started over from the start. I like spankings with “audience participation” like that. Lots of fun. Plus, ellee is seriously the cutest spankee I’ve ever seen. She squeaks and squeals and wiggles and I am in love with her butt.
Observe!
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| Cutest ever! Photo of ellee used with permission |
Malignus also demonstrated the horrors of Jenny to all the girls (you can see the marks on ellee above). Here are mine:
Aaaaand here’s my favorite photo ever! Look at Malignus in the background being all full of sadistic pride and joy! That horrible thing in his hand is Jenny, btw.
Later, we attended a wedding that was held in the cabin and officiated by Megan. It was a really moving ceremony, and included “You may now spank the bride!” I look forward to when the day comes that I get spanked in my wedding dress. In the meantime, it was awesome fun to attend a wedding without putting on pants.
Later that night, I got “caught up with” regarding the bunny incident. I got a short but thorough caning. There was something really enjoyable about hanging out with friends and then being marched downstairs into the other room to get spanked. It felt like the world was right: we all knew what we did and no one was judging us. In fact, they were listening at the top of stairs as I was crying out and yelping. When I came back up they were laughing and smiling and such things. For some reason, that was the time when I was the most aware of this feeling in the cabin.
That evening, I got to have some topping fun with ellee:
She was wearing her famous Nintendo panties and I was wearing a Miffy shirt and we both had bows on, so you can rest assured that it was the cutest scene evar.
Later that night, YS spanked Ten for a long time and it made his hand explode horribly! I’d only seen this happen to this scale once before, and it took like, a week to get there.
It was a good thing it happened on the last night, though, because otherwise it would have been sad rest of the party for him. It did mean that I didn’t get spanked by him as much as I’d like to, but I’ll be visiting them in the future and I’m sure that will mean lots of spanking time. 😀
There’s still a little more to be said for what happened that night, but I’ll hopefully be able to finish the rest of the stories tomorrow in Chapter 4. I hope you’re not bored yet!
I haven’t been online for a few days. I’ve let messages sit in my email and fetlife inboxes. In fact, until last night, I hadn’t so much as touched my laptop for 72 hours. Now, that’s unusual. Why? Because, first of all, I’m addicted to the internet. Secondly, I love my laptop. It’s the first computer of my very own that has actually worked well. My first two computers (“Lappy” and “The Craptop” respectively) could never do anything right pretty much ever and were in and out of repairs all the time. I bought this machine in 2007 and have never regretted it. With the exception of the power cable that died while I was at my mother’s house over Easter last year and had to be fixed with tape and later replaced and the keys that are missing from my keyboard from over use, nothing has gone wrong with it in the past five years.
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| I had trouble color correcting this photo. My computer is actually white and not gross looking. |
This means that my dear Shenandoah Puff Octopus Prime (who still has a shorter name than my legal name!) has never spent the night in the shop, and therefore, the only time I’ve gone this long without using the computer since 2007 was either when I was in the hospital or when Serious_Face grounded me from my computer for four days because I said that I was more interested in looking at this than listen to him talk more about the differences between Greek and Roman coinage. (Men in my life are always over reacting!)
Also, while we’re on the subject of SPOP, this is what the front looks like:
Whoever comments and names the most characters/cuteness franchises represented here will get a Cuteness Appreciation Award and public recognition.
What has been keeping me away from my beloved? I’ve been working (at my job) quite a bit recently, but I’ve been sleeping poorly and constantly feeling run down. I’d come home from work or wake up in the morning and want to do nothing. I spent my free time this weekend entirely lying around and watching TV with Malignus. He even surprised me and came to pick me up from work and take me to go watch a movie and I was like “Just take me home for bed! I am going to die! My legs are going to break off at the knee and that would be sad!” (which made me feel like a total cuntmuffin but was absolutely the truth.)
I felt icky and gross, but I had not yet reached the point of True, Undeniable Sickness®: I still wanted to be spanked. So yesterday, I asked Malignus to spank me before I headed to work and then eagerly climbed over his lap. He spanked me with his hand, which does not mean that he went easy on me. I love hand-spankings because they’re at the very core of my kink and they feel so close and connecting, but in a lot of situations, one sacrifices the amount of hurt for that comfort. Except with Malignus. When he wants to, he makes a hand spanking hurt more than many other people’s best efforts with a hairbrush. This was what happened yesterday: he spanked me crazy hard and fast and left me crying out and gasping. When he stopped, he told me that was my warmup. I had a very scrunchy face. He then did the same thing to my thighs, and told me that was the warmup for my thighs. I was already on the verge of tears (which is really not surprising considering that he’s made me cry with a single swat from a dishtowel) when he directed me to get up and get over the bed. He then proceeded to give me a very quickly paced caning, covering both my bottom and my thighs, which left me crying very hard indeed.
When I sat up next to him to hug him, though, he started hitting the front of my thighs with it, which is a very mean thing to do. I think that the main reason he’s so crazy about hitting the front of my thighs is because he gets to look at my sad and pathetic face while he’s doing it, and because it hurts so much, it’s EXTREMELY sad. He started hitting me a bunch and I sat there crying and sobbing and doing what Ami calls “screaming like a dying monster.” He then stopped and I finished my crying and he would start again to make me cry a bit more. He then gave me the most difficult of instructions ever: “Don’t cry.” He returned to caning my thighs (they weren’t full strokes, mind you, but the amount of sting was ridiculous) and I tried my best not to cry. It didn’t last long, though, because Malignus collapsed on the bed and literally rolled around laughing. Apparently my sad face while trying not to cry was the saddest he’s ever seen me, and it filled his sadistic, little heart with such glee that he was “happier than he’d been in a long time.” We will eventually be recreating this on film for your viewing pleasure. I know it’s been a good scene when it ends with me crying and him grinning uncontrollably. It just makes the world feel right.
I don’t like going to work on the weekends, but the day went by very quickly when I was covered with welts and bruises. I felt warm and safe and loved. That said, impact play actually CAN’T cure all problems (WHO KNEW?!) and about halfway through my shift I started coughing and sniffling. By the time I got home, I felt about half dead. The mystery of why I’ve been so run down was finally solved: I was slowly but surely getting sick.
It’s actually good timing: I’m going away this weekend, so this means that I’ll be better by the time I leave and I won’t be likely to get sick again while I’m there. More details on where I’m going coming soon.
For now, though, I’ve been spending my time coughing and snuggling in bed with my Pikachu. I basically feel like this:
Hopefully, I can get back to my usual posting schedule. If I can stay awake long enough to write.
There have been a lot of people posting all kinds of romantic and interesting stories about their Valentine’s Day celebrations and spankings and such things. Compared to some, mine was extremely simple. We’re going to celebrate things more this weekend: on Tuesday, Malignus and I both worked evening shifts. Unfortunately, the night before, neither of us got much sleep. Our original plan was to celebrate Valentine’s day earlier in the day before we went to work. I was extremely sleepy when Malignus woke me up, but less so after he gave me a very spontaneous but thorough “wake up caning” with a 1/8″ acrylic cane. Spontaneous spankings are very hard for me to be submissive during, because they go from “I’m doing nothing!” to “I’m getting spanked!” at an extremely high speed and therefore don’t leave me much (any) time to get into a submissive headspace. Still, I did a fairly good job of being still for it. I was wearing my pajamas still when I started getting caned, and about halfway through, Malignus pulled the bottoms and my panties down to cane me on my bare bottom. I rarely ever get bared by someone other than myself, so it had a strong psychological effect on me and brought me into a sort of warmly submissive headspace for the rest of the scene. This is a lot of writing about a very short thing: he caned me at a very fast pace and it didn’t last long at all, but it made me feel happy and loved, and was therefore certainly worth sharing.
After a little while of being awake, we decided that we didn’t want to go out that day after all because we were feeling excessively sleepy. First, though, we spent a little while hanging out in the bedroom and watching TV. We were in high spirits and Malignus was in a creatively sadistic mood. While I was only wearing a t-shirt and panties, he told me to hand him a short cane. He told me that he was going to hit me on the arm with it (he occasionally hits me with little force on my upper arm). I made a scrunchy face but braced myself for this. Instead, he hit me on the front of my thigh. That’s one of his favorite “games”: hitting me where I don’t expect it. Then he hit me on that thigh again. Then he hit me on the other thigh. Then I cried. Then he gave me a few rapid fire strokes on the back of one of my thighs as I was rolling around in pain. This particular cane is one that doesn’t get used as often as others, I think largely because it’s a shorter cane. I rarely ever get caned while OTK (although the first few canings I got, including very extended ones, were done that way) so my two shorter canes get less use than longer, more intimidating looking ones. The one that was selected on Valentine’s Day was an 18″ Tearjerker JR Delrin Cane from Cane-iac. It’s actually one of the first canes that I owned. Scotchgrove purchased it for me for my birthday. It’s one of those things that doesn’t look all that scary when you see it lying there:
Then you get hit with it a few times….
and suddenly it’s very intimidating indeed! The thing that I find the most amazing about this cane is just how much the welts raised after just a few moments:
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| Malignus said that it looked like I slept with Wolverine. |
Another interesting thing about it: from time to time, cane strokes will break the skin a tiny bit or leave a little blood blister where the tip hit. For whatever reason, probably something good about the design, this cane just left a larger welt on the tip instead of a cut. That’s much nicer and probably better for people who don’t want to get broken skin. The marks kind of looked like this: •–––. Another nice thing (in this situation) was the fact that it’s a very stingy cane that isn’t particularly weight-bearing. This meant that I didn’t get as crazy of thigh bruising as I did the first time I got my thighs caned (which was with an acrylic cane.) It still hurt. A lot.
Finally, when we were playing around Malignus said something to tease me and I responded with “I’m going to poison your sandwich!” After he finished hitting me with things, he did indeed ask for a sandwich (that’s my usual aftercare: making him a sandwich :P). I had a bunch of kitten stickers left over from making my Valentine’s Day cards for my friends, so I stuck one on the top of the sandwich to be the poison. I felt very clever. Malignus responded by setting the sticker on fire in a candle. SAD FACE!
 |
| You can sort of see the burnt remnants of the sticker. |
After some cuddling, we napped and then went off to work. I spent the rest of the night feeling contented, warm, loved and sore. It was a lovely day indeed. 😀
Oh, Hai!
Alex
Los Angeles, California, United States
First and foremost, I’m a girl who loves being spanked. It’s at the very center of my being. I’m also a professional spanking model, which means I get to do what I love for my job. I’m twenty six years old, and currently located in Los Angeles when I’m not traveling around on my adventures. My vanilla interests include poetry, film history, academia, Pokemon, indie music, baby animals, baking and cooking, collecting vintage clothes and lots of cuddling.
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