Following our POV adventures, we shot a film that satisfies my fondness for cuteness and the ridiculous. It’s a girl/girl pajama scene between me, Zoe and a giant stuffed bear. When I first saw that this giant bear existed in the studio, I knew that I wanted to lie over its lap. This is my brain we’re talking about. That should probably be a given. I like bears a lot, and I love stuffed animals, and there’s also this:
This is a page from the children’s book “The Lonely Doll,” which I discovered at the library when I was a young girl. It was the very first visual representation of a spanking that I ever saw, although I knew that I was obsessed long before that. It’s been a very poignent memory for me, and on some level, I always wanted to get “spanked” by a teddy bear.
In the film that we did next, I got my chance for that! Some people think that this is a bit weird, but it’s also gotten a lot of positive attention, so I guess I’m not the only one who really likes it.
We filmed a girl/girl scene between me and Zoe, where, as tends to be the case in scenes between Zoe and I, she is my peer and kind of a bully. We had a pajama pillow fight, and then I made fun of her giant bear (very uncharacteristic of me, obviously fueled by jealousy). We fought a bit, and she forced me over her lap and then spanked me, then went off and obtained a hairbrush which she also used quite thoroughly. At the end, she had me lie over the bear’s lap, and she set it up so that it looked like the bear was spanking me. It was full of win.
I really like filming with Zoe. She’s incredibly creative, and her bullying and tormenting me is, well, pretty hot. It was a very good scene.
The next scene that we shot was another domestic one, in which I looked rather young indeed in a primary school uniform, and then I changed into PJ’s. I was unfamiliar with this sort of uniform (a one piece, gingham dress) but it looked very, very young. This is unpublished, so there will be less about that one, but here’s a still that John put on his blog:
|Yay, nightshirts and scrunchy faces!|
We then had lunch and took a little break before moving on to do more exciting adventures in me getting spanked. The next thing that we filmed was a two part school-girl film, which was a lot of fun. The plot was somewhat complicated, and it involved Zoe supervising me in detention (since she was a prefect and had to learn about how to properly beat awfully behaved girls) where I was being punished by Paul for being the worst exchange student from the US ever, and having stolen a bunch of “supplies” from the faculty Christmas party. I got to be kind of a little bitch in this scene, which is exciting. Paul responded to this by being truly antagonistic and mean. It was a different attitude than a lot of school films I’ve done, where the disciplinarian is meant to simply be a very nice person who happens to have to beat me. I felt like in this scene, we actually fought. At one point, he said “I don’t like you at all, Reynolds,” which is an attitude that felt really, really right for the scene, but I understand is delicate territory for some viewers. That made the scene appear very delightfully dark and non-consensual, and I adored that. I really like doing dark and kind of awful scenes with people who, in the real world, are lovely and close to me. The spanking hurt a lot, too, because at that point I was pretty toast from the previous few days, and I’m pretty sure that I broke into tears at one point (I haven’t actually watched this yet, largely because I’m concerned that it is going to make me miss Paul a lot and I’ll feel suddenly sad). The scene ended with me being put in the corner, which was possibly the worst part of the scene because in an unheated building in the English winter, corners are cold and miserable places. Once I’m cold and sniffling, Mr. Kennedy took off to go (I don’t remember where) and left Zoe in charge of me, with instructions to punish me again if I dared to move. I’m sure you can’t imagine what part two of this video is. 🙂
|Paul is WAY too happy about the fact that he’s about to beat me in this photo. I’m not sure what I’m doing with my face. I possibly laughing at him. 😛|
|At some point during filming, I defiantly shoved a bunch of stuff and ended up throwing Paul’s glasses on the floor. Oops. Even bratty-awful Alex had to apologize for that.|
Once the second half of filming that was done, Zoe and I did another girl/girl scene together, which was pretty much one of the best spanking films ever made, I’d imagine. It involves me being a nieve, American Girl Scout attempting to attend a Girl Guides meeting and instead getting horribly tormented and molested by evil, awful Zoe. It gets kind of sexy (although not blatantly sexual) and has some hilarious lines in it. Plus, we look so cute:
We were meant to do a judicial caning scene after this, but I was exhausted and tired and just didn’t have another full out beating left in me at that point, so I asked if we could do something else instead, about which everyone was extremely understanding. What we ended up doing instead was very lovely: a sweet, very consensual domestic scene between me and Paul. My smile in this photo is genuine: I felt very contented by this. It seemed like the perfect end to the day:
That’s the end of the story of this shoot, finally. I have many more adventures from England coming soon, though. I want to briefly thank John (The Chief) for the fact that I cribbed about half or more of the photos included in this post directly from his post on the same subject. I appreciate your sharing, and having good photos of me. 🙂
Before I go on to my next post, I want to address a few things. First of all, I have been pretty busy and frequently out of town, so apologize for the lapses in posting. I’ve been toying with the idea of putting my UK stories on hold and just writing about BBW, but I’ve decided to work harder at getting thru each bit the way that it happened. Also, I wrote this entire post while on the plane to New York, but I was unable to save it (since the plane was without Wifi) and ended up losing all my work, so I’ve been kind of pissed about that and avoiding rewriting. Still, time to move forward!
When I left off, we’d completed our first three videos of the day, and after lunch, we moved on to film a pair of short, straight-forward films on the infinity curve. In case you don’t know what an infinity curve is, it’s a big, white space with walls that curve in such a way that it looks like you’re sort of floating in space and that it goes on forever. I’d actually never worked on a real one before (only a seamless backdrop) so that was kind of neat. The scenes that we shot were both school scenes, and they’re very austere, so the background works wonderfully for them. The first scene was a school gym class style scene, which I loved the hell out of. Added to the list of things I didn’t know before this trip: you’re supposed to wear regular underwear beneath the navy blue gym knickers. This was not what I would have expected, but it was cool with me. Anything that involves more underwear works for me! The panties that I wore underneath were vintage and very delicate. I’d never seen anything like them before, but I liked them right away.
|It’s hard to see the pattern, but it’s pretty 😛|
Like I said, the scene was very straight-forward. There wasn’t really much of any story: just me getting strapped in a very austere setting. This is something that I don’t do a lot of in the films that I tend to do in the US: things that are very to-the-point, and that point is me getting whacked. This stripped down nature, plus the fact that the scenes were shot in a dreamy, blank background made it feel like we’d simply stepped into one of my fantasies and I hadn’t bothered to make up the rest of the details, so they were left out.
It was awesome.
The next scene that we did was very similar: it was the same setting and same sort of situation, but this time, it was a school scene. While all the school girl stuff is a big fantasy for me, the English version of things has always held a very strong appeal. I got to wear a tie (which I’ve never gotten to do in an American school film) and I liked that quite a bit:
|This is a photo of me being pleased about my tie.|
The scene itself included me being bent over one of the desks from the school set and getting caned and precious little else, and it felt so potent because of that. One of the resulting images from it has become one of my favorite “Alex getting spanked” photos of all time:
It’s very much a photographic representation of that part of my kink. This was also the first time I had ever been caned in England: the first time I visited I was spanked plenty of times and hit with various objects, but I never got the cane. This event pleased me quite a bit: it just seems like something “right” to go to England and get beaten with a cane, like that’s something that every spanko bottom should get to do at least once in their lives. I’m also pleased that Paul was the person who gave me my first caning in England, as he’s gone on to become someone very special to me. Fortuitous how that worked out. 🙂
Once we finished that video, we then went on to shoot photosets, which is one of my favorite things to do. When I was just a consumer of spanking pornography, still photographs were the main thing that I was interested in. They feel artistic and creative, as well as open-ended in a way that lets the mind wander in delightful directions. Because I started out my modeling career simply being photographed, it’s also something that I feel more confident doing. We shot several sets, all on the infinity curve, because it was just that cool.
In one set, I got to wear an actual English nurse uniform (although I’m not sure if it’s modern or not? I’m somewhat confused on that). It’s super different from anything that I’ve ever seen in the U.S. Usually nurses just wear scrubs around here, and there’s nothing attractive about scrubs, at least to me. This involved leggings, though, and they were tight enough that you could see my underwear through them, which makes for a win in my book.
|Thank you for spanking me, Mr. Osborne!|
In another set, there was more caning, of course, because one can never have enough of that! Zoe had to help me with the “suspender belt” (garter belt) since I’d never really worn one before, but I discovered that I’m actually quite fond of them. Less pulling up stockings, more having something to frame my ass and make it look even rounder!
The next photo comes from a set which was cute and sweet, and which I like a ton. Pink bow + snuggly spankings = happy, contended Alex. Here is a photo to prove it:
|Whenever I see any one of these photos, I think “Oh! That one is my favorite!” until I get to the next one, which also becomes my favorite.|
The final set that we did at the end of the first day of filming involves me looking very young and sweet and Paul coming in to be all scary and terrifying. I kept insisting that he was a very bad man for beating such an innocent looking girl as myself. 😛
|Yeah, having the same problem, because this one is also my favorite.|
Once we finished shooting and we got everything cleaned up and packed away for the day, we drove to a small grocery store to get some supplies (read: alcohol) for the evening. Zoe once again demonstrated her very impressive patience when I wanted to get some chocolate but didn’t know what any of it was. She walked thru the entire candy aisle explaining things to me and helping me figure out what stuff I would like. She then bought me my first ever Easter Egg. Now, we obviously have Easter chocolate in the US, and we have a lot of candy that is shaped like eggs, but we don’t have the exact same thing as they do in England. In England, Easter Eggs are big, foil wrapped chocolate eggs with something interesting inside them, and I guess they’re sort of a tradition. Zoe and I got two, and some pink fizz (I think that the name of that is pretty self explanatory, right? Pink sparkling wine) and planned to have a picnic with them in our room later that night.
We then went to a restaurant near our hotel, where I had to take a very long time deliberating over what I wanted to eat again. I’d like to say that I got better at this as my time in England wore on, but I really didn’t. Even once I knew what I liked to eat, I still had to think about it for far longer than I should have. Dinner was very enjoyable, though. It mostly involved Paul, John, Zoe, the cameraman and I chatting about all sorts of industry related topics, including a lot of the history of the various sites that film in England. We stayed there for a long time, and I felt relaxed and happy. At one point, Zoe and I went to the restroom (in a pair, as girls do) and when she turned on the sink to wash her hands, she sprayed water all over herself. She then attempted to dry the front of her jeans using a hand dryer. I took a photo of this, because this is the kind of stuff that I absolutely dig about Zoe. She’s goofy and ridiculous and I simply cannot get enough of her.
After we finished at the restaurant, we walked over to a pub and had a few drinks. I will not say anything about anyone else (although John was pretty open on his blog about the fact that he his fair share to drink) but I was very responsible. It was also just a very nice time. I find going out for drinks in England to be more fun than it is in the US, but that may be because I live in South Dakota, where nothing is particularly exciting.
Once last call had been completed, we all wandered back to the hotel, where Zoe and I went on to eat chocolate and drink wine the pink fizz before falling asleep.
Morning came, of course, far earlier than I would have liked it to. Mornings are a real problem for me. I’m just not cut out for them. Sleeping until 1:00 makes me happiest. This is obviously by no means practical in any part of adult society, so I adapt and deal with it. But when Zoe’s alarm went off to summon us to breakfast, we unanimously decided to text the guys and let them know that we were going to sleep in. Besides, I didn’t want to see Breakfast Lady again, anyway.
We then returned to the cold… I mean, to the studio, where we began my fourth consecutive day of shooting, this time for Triple A. The day began on the infinity curve again, with a sort of straight forward, introductory spanking.
|Fun fact: that t-shirt is the one that I was wearing the very first time I got spanked, when I was eighteen. Nostalgia central!|
It was a pretty nice spanking, and a good way to warm up for the day, so I was pretty pleased with it. When that was filmed, we moved on to start shooting some POV scenes for John’s new site: POV Spanking. This stuff was a little bit more challenging to shoot, as it felt very unnatural to me. The idea of POV (point-of-view) is that it appears like the person watching the film is seeing what he would actually be seeing where he the one giving the spanking. This makes for a lot of non-traditional filming. I had to talk directly to the camera without hearing any lines back, and that just felt very awkward and difficult for me to time. I’ve been told that I did a pretty good job, though, so I hope that’s the case. We shot a number of these scenes, experimenting with different positions and implements, as well as filming styles. I urge you all to go check out the clips if that’s something that you’re interested in. 🙂
It’s getting late, so I’ll continue this story in the next post.
I’ve covered an entire day! Winner! 😛
When I last left off in the tale of my adventures overseas, I’d just been picked up at the airport upon my return to England from a brief stay in Holland. I’d been greeted by Paul Kennedy (of Northern Spanking) and Zoe Page (who is a different person than “Zoey” who has been mentioned in a few older posts). The three of us were going to go by car up to Derbyshire, where we were going to meet John Osborne and do two days of shooting: one for Northern and one for Triple A. It turns out that Zoe had been feeling sick earlier that day, but had gotten enough rest to feel up to coming along despite that. This was the first time that I’d ever really gotten to ride in a car in England, and I found that kind of excessively exciting. I was very aware of how different certain things were. I was pretty fascinated by this stuff, but I also tried to keep this at least somewhat under wraps: I didn’t want to be “that girl” who comes to a foreign country and marvels at every dumb little thing and annoys everyone around her. Still, I liked riding in the seat where I’m usually driving (they let me sit in the front ^_^) and noticing the different wording on signs and such things. I was particularly amused by a series of signs that listed the cities we were driving towards and included “THE NORTH.” I can’t exactly tell you why this made me giggle a lot, but it did.
We stopped at the first service area that we found to get something to eat, since I was pretty starved. I there encountered a minor problem: I didn’t know what the fuck most of the stuff on the menu was. I was a matter of things having different names combined with not being sure how similar food items would be to what I was used to. This lead to me asking about eighty questions, throughout which Paul and Zoe were surprisingly patient. I had originally been slightly intimidated by Zoe, since I had seen her be pretty terrifying on film before meeting her. I was glad to see that in real life, she was sweet and awesome, and my rival at being a goofball. We related on a few things and giggled quite a bit. Then we got ice cream, which is instant happiness for me. I was pretty happy with my life, and instead of feeling worried like I had upon my first arrival, I felt excited about whatever adventures were in store for me.
After dinner, we got back in the car and drove the rest of the way there. I discovered that I’m not fond of the roundabouts system: it makes me a little bit queasy. The ride didn’t seem too long to me, probably because I was very contented, even though I was much quieter than I usually am because I was still adapting to my surroundings. Eventually we arrived at the hotel where we would be staying for the next two nights: it was a small and quaint bed and breakfast. The caretaker greeted us and showed us to our rooms and then asked us some questions about breakfast. I basically just agreed to everything that she said, because I didn’t actually know what a “full” breakfast entailed and I didn’t want to look ignorant. Then we went up to get settled. Zoe and I were sharing a room, and I thought it was super cute, even though it was a bit cold.
|Zoe in our quaint little room 🙂|
They had left us a tea set which I found excessively adorable:
|In case you cannot tell from my lousy photo, the mugs have cats on them.|
We then went to meet John and chat in the other room. We talked about the studio where we’d be shooting, looked at some content that John had shot there previously on his computer and just chatted a bit while we had a glass of wine. I was wearing my bunny pajamas, which Paul pretty instantly decided he wanted to use for a film that we’d be doing the next day. This pleased me greatly, because I’m a little obsessed with my bunny pajamas. Eventually I got tired and Zoe and I retired to bed.
The next morning we got up and packed our things for the day, then met the guys downstairs for breakfast. We were a little bit late. That’s what happens with girls (read: Alex) in the mornings sometimes. :/ The woman who ran the B+B (who from this morning on was referred to as “breakfast lady”) brought out our plates. The plate was filled with stuff that I wasn’t really expecting. I ate all my meat and some toast, and then sort of picked at the rest of the stuff. Eating beans at breakfast wasn’t really all that appealing to me. There was a big pile of mushrooms on the plate, and I’m super-deadly-allergic to mushrooms, so I refused to eat anything they had touched out of fear of going into anaphylactic shock, which is generally not how I like to start my day. And since I hadn’t asked for anything otherwise during the conversation with breakfast lady where I agreed a lot, my eggs were served with uncooked yolks. I know that this is simply me being fussy, but I just won’t eat eggs that aren’t totally and entirely cooked. I’m tremendously stubborn, because I think they’re gross. Serious_Face once refused to let me get up from his table until I’d at least tried one, and I sat there petulantly for three hours until he gave up and beat me instead (still better than the eggs). Fortunately, no one at this table wanted to waste the entire morning watching me not eat, so we told breakfast lady that we were finished. She was not pleased with me, and gave me lots of dirty looks for not eating her breakfast. We all found this infinitely entertaining. After a quick visit with the fat, hotel cat named Monty and a brief incident in which John hit a trashcan with his car while trying to backup, we were on our way to the studio.
Once we arrived and unloaded at the studio, I became aware of it’s primary feature: it was cold. I don’t like to be cold. (Question: why do you live in South Dakota, then? Answer: have you seen how many things that I don’t like but do?) Fortunately, Zoe was basically the best ever and made me tea approximately every 20 minutes to keep me warm.
Once set up and makeup were completed, we got to filming the first scene. It was between me and Zoe and filmed on a stable set that included several bales of hay. This hay got everywhere, and it’s actually STILL in my hairbrush, but it looked awesome and was kind of fun to romp around in.
Filming with Zoe was interesting because most of the scenarios we were involved in were written so that we were peers and Zoe’s character wasn’t so much of an authority figure over me as she was just a bully. This was a fun and refreshing change of pace for me. Also, Zoe is really hot. And she’s very creative within a scene: I was immediately taken aback by how quickly she came up with ideas of new directions in which to take her bullying and bossing. Plus, she was great at spanking. This scene was actually my first riding crop scene (I’m pretty sure, anyway, and certainly my first on film) and I liked it quite a bit: stingy and whippy without feeling like any other implement, in particular.
The second scene that we did was similar in terms of character relationships: Zoe’s character was kind of an awful bitch and I was a goody-goody and a bit of a nerd. That obviously worked well for me, because that’s sort of me in real life :P. This was set in a school room, which made me very happy indeed.
The desks in the school set were covered in graffiti which kind of fascinated me, especially because a lot of it had slang on it which I didn’t recognize. I then got a vocabulary lesson on various ways to call people a slut in England. I also couldn’t help but add to the vandalism a little bit:
|Add that to the list of “bad things that I did and got away with!”|
And I added a little love for my bestie:
Our third scene was a very traditional and straight forward, bedtime punishment scene that Paul did with me. There isn’t actually anything that unique about it, but it’s probably my favorite scene that we shot that weekend (honestly, it’s probably among my favorite scenes I’ve done on film). This is because it appeals to a lot of things at the center of my kink. My character was genuinely a good girl, but she was clearly quite far out of line this time and had gotten herself into big trouble. There was a domestic setting and the inclusion of my cute pajamas, which are both good things in my book. The spanking was primarily OTK while on a bed, which is my personal favorite spanking position, and the more severe stuff which followed was given with me lying over pillows, which is a very familiar position for me, and one that I find very emotionally comfortable. And I got hit on my thighs.
|I stole this photo from John’s blog, because it’s awesome.|
All of this plus Paul’s attitude in the scene fostered a lot of vulnerability in me, and I just dove into it. I let myself get really worked up and I either cried a little or came very close to it (I don’t remember now). When it was finished, I felt very genuinely cozy.
|I’m possibly smiling more than I was supposed to be. 😛|
I know that I’m only half way thru a day of shooting, but I’m going to stop here and continue on in the next post, because I have approximately 87 things I need to do before I leave for BBW. So. Many. Adventures. More posting soon! ♥
The next morning, I got up and finished my packing before Mike came to pick me up for our second day of shooting. I was well rested and well organized, although I had not eaten breakfast. In fact, I had not eaten breakfast either morning. The woman at the check out desk pointed this out to Mike, serving as foreshadowing for hotel-staff-not-pleased-by-my-lack-of-eating-breakfast to come.
After the check out process was completed, we drove over to the train station to pick up Leandra, who was going to shoot with us for the second day. Leandra was definitely interesting to hang out with and fun to work with. She’s very different than me: a lot of our conversation was based on me trying to explain to her that yes, most of what I do is spanking videos and yes, I get spanked in my personal life. Lots and lots. She was never judgey about my fetishism, just kind of fascinated, and we chatted about this between scenes.
Our first scene was for Real Life Spankings, in which Leandra was getting a maintenance spanking and I happened to peek in and spy on her, which of course, resulted in me getting spanked myself while Leandra watched from the corner. I was actually legitimately interested in watching her get spanked. I mean, she’s pretty hot. And there was spanking involved. These are two pretty sure fire ways to hold my interest. I like the way that Leandra keeps all her limbs off the ground while getting spanked. I tend to do the opposite of that, for stability and comfort, but I definitely like the way that her positioning looks.
After this scene, we shot a set of scenes for Spanked in Uniform’s Rockford School of Dance. This involved Lenadra and I dressing up like cheerleaders. Cheerleader uniforms are a kind of funny thing for me. This shoot is the only time I’ve ever worn one. When I was in high school, I was weird and unpopular and all the cheerleaders and their friends bullied me. My girlfriend at the time was originally a cheerleader, but our romantic involvement lead to the team’s unanimous decision to expel her from the squad. So while I’ve always thought that cheerleading outfits looked pretty hot, I had never been able to get too far past the “mean girl” idea that I have in my head. When I put the uniform on I didn’t feel weird about it at all, though. Admittedly, it was only very loosely related to the outfits that were worn by my peers, but I felt pretty okay about being a cheerleader. It was almost like I was taking something back.
|Also, my skirt was really inappropriately short. Bonus!|
I’ve been kind of delighting in darkness during video making recently, and I think it would be great to get to play a really horrible, cruel cheerleader, like the kind that picked on me day in and day out for those long two years when I went to High School. I certainly know a lot of the lines. 😛
The cheerleader scene that we did was much more straight forward and a lot less mean than that. It starts off with me being hired to teach a group of European cheerleaders some moves (being from America, I obviously know all about cheerleading) and being told that if the girls get out of line, I’m to punish them with spankings. That very day, Leandra gets on my bad side and I take her upstairs and to task over my knee.
Spanking Leandra was pretty fun. She has a pretty beautifully shaped bottom, and her responses to the spanking were very cute to listen to. It’s one of the only topping videos of me where I don’t think I look kind of silly. The film has been released, so I’m happy to share a few photos from it!
|You can sort of see down my shirt in this photo. That’s almost as good as being able to see up my skirt.|
We then shot a sequel video to this in which I get spanked, but I won’t go too far into detail about that for fear of giving something away.
After we finished this we had some lunch and got back to work with filming. The rest of the day was spent doing school girl films, which was obviously fine with me! It made a lot of sense to me that we saved this for the second day of filming when Leandra would also be there. One school girl is a good thing, but the awesomeness of school girl films increases exponentially in my mind based on how many girls there are, especially in matching outfits (this is why I love Sternwood Academy so damn much! There are a lot of us, and we all match!), so having both of us made those films a lot of fun. Again, I won’t talk too much about the film before it has been released, but the character that I played in these scenarios was a little bit different than how I usually behave, which is always an interesting thing to do.
Once we wrapped our final scene, I had to get my stuff together because I needed to go to the airport. I was getting kind of stressed about this: I was really afraid that I’d get back to England and the immigration officer would say “No, sorry, you are never allowed to go to England again.” Mike dropped me off and we said goodbye. I’m hoping that we’ll work together next time I come back to Europe. 🙂 I managed to get my baggage checked with fewer problems than I had last time (I didn’t have to throw anything additional away) and then got to my flight. I was hoping to find something to eat before flying, but the airport I flew out of was rather tiny.
I got on a tiny plane and listened to music on my phone, trying to relax. The whole time I was in flight, though, I was rehearsing my conversation that I’d be having with immigration. I had all the papers I needed to and everything was in order, but I continued to worry after my experience last time.
When I landed at Standstet I was pleased to see that the lines were much shorter and less scary seeming than they had been at Heathrow. It still took a long time for it to be my turn, but while I was waiting, I started to chat to a couple of American girls who were studying aboard in Holland and visiting England for a week. It was nice to talk to other people who were equally concerned about immigration (although they had a lot less reason to be than I did!) and who had a similar background to me. I hadn’t realized just how alone and sort of alienated I’d felt since I’d left Vegas. I don’t mean that I didn’t connect with the people that I’d been spending time with before: just that I felt very aware that I was in a different place and with people who I didn’t really know. It was nice to be with someone who was in some ways similar to me, even if she was a total stranger.
Eventually I got called up to the desk, where a friendly looking man took my boarding card and I felt a lot more relaxed than I had a few minutes ago. He asked me very basic and straightforward questions, I showed him my papers and he stamped my passport. VICTORY! 😀
From there, I went to the baggage claim where my bags were already waiting, and then exited the secure area. I was being picked up by Paul Kennedy and Zoe Page, and we were driving up to Derbyshire for two more days of shooting. It wasn’t ideal scheduling, but it was the way things had worked out. I had only met Paul very briefly at Shadowlane last year, but when I saw him, I kind of breathed a huge sigh of relief. It was the first time since my goodbyes in Vegas that I had seen someone I had ever met before! It was a very refreshing feeling. In my first post about my travels I mentioned that I was waiting for something else that would make me feel secure, and for whatever reason, this was it. Having all of my immigration stuff completed and being with someone that I knew, at least a little, meant that I finally felt some sense of stability.
Hopefully it will be fewer days before I post my next segment. Things have been a bit busy for me since I’ve been home. ♥
So, I’m back home from England. I didn’t blog at all during the final segment of my trip, mostly because I was not consistently at my computer and I was using any and all down time that I had to obtain cuddles, which is a life choice that I’m entirely okay with. The situation that leaves me in, though, is being an entire month behind in terms of what part of my narrative has been shared and where I am in my daily life. It’s my goal to get thru this entire section before I leave for BBW, so I need to really get to work on this stuff. YS has been very flexible and forgiving about my lack of updating, but I’m getting a bit cross with myself. Unfortunately, when I have so much material to cover, it gets hard for to plow thru it. It’s just daunting. I know I only make it harder for myself when I DON’T post, though, so I’m going to get into high gear and start telling stories. Onward to the story of the rough start that I had, which, fortunately, lead to great things. 🙂
When I last wrote (not counting my video blog, of course) I had just finished recounting the story of my epic scene with Richard Windsor. Following that scene, I basically had to start packing right away in order to get to my flight. I was kind in a sad emotional place at the time. Leaving people is always hard, and I had to leave before the party was really finished, which was even worse. Additionally, I was very nervous about going to England by myself. SF, with whom I was intending to stay for the majority of my visit, had contacted me early that morning to let me know that he was dealing with a pretty awful personal emergency and that he wasn’t sure what his availability would be, which had made me feel extremely unsettled. Additionally, I’m kind of horrified of being deported. Things like immigration and customs always really scare me. What if I say something wrong and they send me away and never let me back into England ever again?! I know it’s a kind of irrational worry, but it has always been a worry, none the less.
Once my packing was finished, I exchanged some tearful hugs with my loved ones, particularly ellee, YS and PTL. Lily Starr and Robert Wolf had agreed to take me to the airport again, which was wonderful. When we were packing up the car, Robert asked me what time my flight left and I explained that it was in about three hours or so. He praised me for planning in advance, which made me feel good, especially because the last time that I had been responsible for logistics with something involving him I had kind of let things get messed up, so I felt like I had redeemed myself a little bit.
I arrived at the airport, got my bags checked and went to the gate. I was flying on Condor, which was really, really cheap, but is not something that I would recommend. There were no entertainment options, the space was smaller and more cramped than the usual airplane and there wasn’t even an overhead light. The flight was long and tedious, and my mind went back and forth between reliving the awesome scenes I had experienced in Vegas and basking in the comfort and warmth I’d felt when surrounded by people I was close to and worrying about what would happen once I got to England. My stomach was tied up in knots a lot of the way there because I genuinely didn’t know what was waiting for me when I landed. I knew that I had SF there, who would hopefully be able to let me stay at his place like we’d originally planned, and who I really wanted to see. I also knew that I’d be spending a week with Pandora Blake, who I had met at TASSP the year before and developed a very close internet friendship with over time, and I really looked forward to that. The rest of it was a big question mark, though. I had lots of shoots booked, but I didn’t actually know any of the people that I’d be working with, really. I had met a number of people I’d be working with for Northern Spanking briefly at Shadowlane last year when I did my first shoot for the site, but I certainly couldn’t say that I actually knew any of them. Basically, there was nothing about the trip that made me feel entirely secure, but I kept telling myself that it would be alright. I do know how to take care of myself, even in a far away place.
I transfered planes in Frankfurt, Germany, where I got horribly lost in the airport and just made my connecting flight at the last possible minute. That flight was quite short and straightforward, and before I knew it, I had landed in England. This is when my trip became less exciting and more stressful.
I walked up to Immigration officer, who I was unhappy to see was pretty cranky looking. She asked how long I intended on staying in England, and I tried to explain to her that I was only there for one night before I went to Holland (where I was shooting with Spanked In Uniform and Real Life Spankings, but I obviously didn’t tell her that!), but that I’d be returning after two more nights and staying in the country for the rest of the month “visiting friends”. There were various complications and a lot of questioning relating to this plan and the documents I had about the rest of my travel, and it didn’t exactly end well for me, although it could have been worse, of course. In the end, I was given a 24 hour visa and told that my passport was being flagged for when I attempt to re-enter the country. She refused to explain what, exactly, that meant. I was shaken and scared by this whole exchange. It took all my energy not to break out into tears in the middle of the airport.
Now, despite the fact that I spent a few weeks in England back in 2010, I had forgotten a lot of the ways in which the country was different than the US, especially from South Dakota. I found these differences a little overwhelming when I first arrived. I was feeling very lost and alone when I finally had obtained my luggage and dragged it all out of the secure area of the airport. There, I did not find SF waiting for me (although I wasn’t sure if I would or not, as I mentioned before). I paid for internet, then messaged back and forth with Malignus a little bit about my visa situation. I ended up booking myself a hotel room, and getting a bus to the hotel for the night. When I arrived, I was informed that the room was on the first floor, so I wandered around the lowest floor of the hotel dragging all my luggage for approximately 20 minutes before I remembered that in England, that means one flight of stairs up. I managed to find an elevator (lift) and get myself to my room. When I entered the room, though, it was dark, none of the light switches worked and the heat was off. After having been in Los Angeles and then Vegas, I found England to be cold. I was alone in a foreign country which didn’t want me to be there, uncertain of where I’d be going for the rest of my time, exhausted from not having slept on the flight, suffering from party drop after my spank-fest in Vegas and in a cold, dark room. I didn’t even bother to try not to cry.
I tried a variety of things in an attempt to get the lights to turn on, but eventually gave up on them and found an outlet on the other side of the room which had it’s own on/off switch attached, and which worked. I plugged my computer into my power converter, paid 12 pounds to use the internet for the night and then got online. Malignus and some of my other friends helped me figure out what my options were regarding my visa situation. I ended up getting on the phone with the US Embassy and getting things straightened out. I got a list of documents that I needed to print out, and after a lot of running around the hotel I managed to figure out where they printed to and collect them. Malignus was loving and supportive and this made me feel somewhat better. As soon as things were taken care of and I felt confident that once I left the country they would let me back in, I figured out what I had to do to get to my flight in the morning. It was out of Standstet Airport on the other side of the city, so I quite a journey ahead of me. Once I had my directions all straightened out, I realized how tired I felt. I told Malignus that I needed to get some sleep and he supported me in this idea and I signed off for the night. I wanted to take a shower, though, and was scared to do this in the dark. I went back to trying to figure out the lighting and heating situation, since it was so cold that I was wearing my coat and knit hat indoors. I eventually discovered a weird looking device on the door in front of the bathroom. After trying to turn it on in various ways, I realized that I needed to insert my room key into it. Once I did that, the lights came on and the thermostat started to work. I turned the heat all the way up, turned on all the lights in the place and then got into the shower. After showering, the room was still chilly so I attempted to dry my hair, but as soon as I plugged my hairdryer into my only power converter, it made a horrible noise and then stopped working. I tried to plug my computer into the converter again to discover that this had broken it. I towel dried my hair, said a bunch of angry things about the situation under my breath and then put every blanket I could find in the room in a giant pile on the bed and made myself a little nest. As soon as I put my head on the giant pile of pillows that I had collected for myself (since I was also using the spares from the closet) I passed the fuck out.
The next morning, I woke up feeling rested but still pretty filled with anxiety. I tried to focus on the fact that I had gotten everything taken care of, but I couldn’t ever feel entirely confident. I knew that there was some point at which I was going to feel alright and let myself relax, but I didn’t know what that would be yet. I had a lot to do that morning. Even though I hadn’t eaten anything the night before, I skipped breakfast to focus getting myself to my next airport. This process was difficult and expensive. I took the bus back to Heathrow, and then the Heathrow Express to Central London, then two different trains on the Underground, then the Standset Express. I did all this while carrying my backpack, satchel and two very full suitcases by myself. I was kind of impressed with myself when I got to the airport. Upon arrival, I went to check in, only to discover that my bags were dramatically overweight for what was accepted in Europe. This idea hadn’t actually occurred to me: despite carrying a bunch of crap across the country with me basically all the time, I’ve never had an overweight bag before. I ended up dumping whatever stuff I had no attachment to whatsoever that I was carrying (snack food, extra toiletries, intentionally ugly pajamas, et cetera) and still paying a pretty hefty fee. But once that was done and they had finally agreed to let me take my possessions with me, I had purchased a new power adapter and I had eaten a meal, I discovered the thing in the world that made everything okay for a little bit: a store which sold underwear. Purchasing my first international panties (with cats on, no less!) made me feel better. This may sound slightly ridiculous, but eh, this is me that we’re talking about.
Shortly after this transaction was completed, I was able to get on my flight and I took off for Holland, where my adventures continued.
So, I made you wait for two weeks for a post and then it included no spanking and no pictures and was mostly me talking about how hard traveling is. As my darling friend The Bad Alex would say: sorry I’m not sorry! (More upbeat, photo filled post coming tomorrow! Woot!)