So, the first month of the year is very nearly over.
First, let’s have some news and updates from my spanking universe.
Basic stuff first:
I’ve been trying to revitalize my spanking news blog, Spanking Wishes, and I am currently posting something on it literally every day. Please go check it out, and give the corresponding twitter account a follow: @spankingwishes.
I’m active on Fetlife in short bursts, but will be trying to spend more time on the site. I accept all friend requests there, so please feel free to send me one. I also still have a kinky Facebook page, but I’m on that even less frequently. While I have a lot of awesome friends that I primarily communicate with through that site, I also get a ton of sexual harassment over it. I get guys sending me pictures of their genitals on that site far more frequently than on any other. I get called a bitch for not wanting to spend lots of time chatting to total strangers about sex for free. I get people demanding that I give them videos for free because “we’re friends now since you added me on facebook!”
I quickly run out of steam for dealing with this stuff. So, I’ll keep trying, mostly because the spanking romance author community is primarily on facebook and I do want to get more involved in that again, but it’s a struggle for me. If you want to send me a friend request, feel free: just be aware that while I do not post photos that include nudity (including bare bottom photos) on facebook, I post explicitly about spanking pretty much all the time and post links to NSFW material.
The Spanking Awards are going on now, which is always an exciting time!
So far, voting has been opened up in 4 categories.
The first one is Best New Spankee. There were so many new spankees this year that were really amazing, and I’ll be giving a shoutout to a handful of them in a post over Spanking Wishes in the next couple of days (since that’s less about me and more about videos), but the selection in the voting is also awesome. I’m happy to see a bunch of my friends included! I’m particularly proud to see three performers who did their first ever spanking shoots with Paul and I for Northern Spanking in the voting. They’re also three of my favorite girls in general, since I’ve been lucky enough to build close friendships with a lot of the performers that we work with.
So, I’m proud of you guys: Ava Nicole, Linny Lace and Nuna Starks! All three girls deserves awards for being adorable, hard working and taking lots of hard spankings. I love you guys! Plus, a big shout out to my friends Tai and Kenzie, who I haven’t gotten a chance to shoot yet, but really look forward to the day that I do! You girls all kick ass. So, go vote for one of these amazing ladies.
The next is Best New Top, which is a new category this year. I think I may have suggested this at some point, but I don’t know if I actually did or if I just thought about it. But either way, I’m glad that John added this category! Tops don’t get as much love in the spanking video world, to be honest, but we literally couldn’t make videos without them (or, we could just make self spanking, which would get boring really quickly). Plus, after having spent a lot of time on both sides of the the paddle in videos, I feel like it’s more important that a Top does an excellent job than almost any other person involved in video production. You have to be physically accurate and you need to be able to carry yourself with authority and have believable scolding going on. So, yes, love to Tops. Tops everywhere.
In this category, one of my favorite “new” Tops is up for voting: Princess Kelley May! I say “new” as Kelley has a ton of experience as a Top and had done a little bit of it on camera before her return to the screen, but she definitely made a splash when she came back after having been away for a long time. Plus, her shoot for Northern was her first time shooting for a membership site.
Anyway, Kelley is an absolutely great Top. I love the way she scolds and I love the way that she spanks. Besides, she’s totally gorgeous and always has PERFECT HAIR. I’ve been trying to get her to teach me her secrets for years but I think I’m just not destined to have perfect hair.
The other lady I adore in this category is my girl Adriana Evans. As I mentioned in my previous post, Adriana and I have become very close in the past year or so. I love her so much and miss her all the time!
Adriana is also a great Top. I love being spanked by her, although our spanking play often ends up taking a somewhat different direction due to the nature of our relationship… 😉
The next category is Best Facial Expression. I’ve come in the ranking for this before, but I’ve never won it and I would really love it if you would vote for me and make that happen! Think of all the times that I’ve had my face covered with tears and I’ve looked truly pitiful during a spanking. Think of how much eye cream I have to use because I’m always scrunching my face up in pain and agony and I don’t want to get fine lines out of control. Think of the fact that I’ve literally popped my jaw out of alignment because I was biting a pillow too hard when screaming and wailing. (The photo above is a screenshot from Spanking Blogg’s listing about me. You can’t actually click the links. I tried. It’s my own post. Siiiiiigh)
My campaign promises are more hard spankings producing more pathetic sad faces from me. I guarantee it.
The most recently opened category is Best Male Top. My most beloved, very favorite Top on Earth is up for voting in this category. Surprise, it’s Paul!
Honestly, Paul deserves an award just for putting up with my massive amounts of nonsense on a daily basis. But he also does an absolutely fabulous job in videos. He gives hard spankings, he gives perfect canings, and he doesn’t have a gross ego about it. He’s just the best. You should vote for him. :3
So, that’s where we are so far with the Spanking Awards. Remember that you can vote once per device, so if you use the internet from your laptop, desktop, iPad and phone… then you can vote four time. Juuuuuuust saaaaying!
I’m going to start a second post that tells you about what else I’ve been up to this month, but I’ll finish this one with some upcoming news.
I’m going to be on the road a lot coming up!
I’m heading to the UK in the start of February. I’m sorry to tell you guys that this time, I am NOT going to be available for shoots and sessions while I’m abroad. I’m only actually going to be over there for six days, and it is my plan to spend as much of that time as possible just hanging out with my friends and having a much needed kick back.
That said, for those of you who want to do sessions with me in London or elsewhere in the UK, I’ll be over for an extended period of time in August. Make a preliminary mark on your calendars, and feel free to shoot me an email and inquire about details whenever it suits you. I’ll be available to both give and get hard spankings, plus I’ll likely be able to do 2-2-1’s with some of my lovely British friends, as well. But that’s a long way off. I just want to make sure you guys know that my choice not to work while I’m over this time isn’t a permanent change. I just kinda need a holiday. It’s going to be the best.
Later in February, I’ll be heading to Palm Springs for some fun and adventures. (I’m fully booked for my time there, but if enough people are interested in seeing me in that direction I could certainly come out again later one). I’ve never been there so there’s a lot of fun stuff I’m looking forward to seeing.
Then, near the end of the month, I’m heading to Vegas. I *am* taking bookings for both shoots and sessions while I’m there, so feel free to shoot me an email about that: email@example.com . I am going to see a bunch of friends and have an awesome time while I’m there and I’m just so excited.
And after that, I’m heading to Denver to get to see my dear and darling Amoni. Hopefully I can get her to photograph me again! And what’s a trip to Denver without a visit to one favorite spanking sites that I don’t run? I’ll be getting a bunch of spankings for Real Spankings and Real Spankings Institute while I’m there! If anyone would be interested in seeing me for sessions in that area, please let me know ASAP! I’d love to be able to get together with you during that visit. Email address is above.
So, that’s the basic news. Watch this space for more detailed information about what my life was like in January, coming soon!
Look at me, continuing my post! Two posts in one month! This year is off to a good start…well, in terms of posts anyway.
Let’s get into it right away and look at scenes 6 – 10 in my top ten favorite scenes of 2016!
This scene was shot when I was in Vegas at an event with friends early in 2016. It was during this time when Adriana Evans and I were first starting to bond. Getting close to Adriana and building our special relationship (one part lovers, one part like sisters, one hundred percent normal, don’t worry about it) has really been one of the most special things that’s happened since 2016, and I hope that we get to spend a lot of time together in 2017. She’s very previous to me. *heart eyes*
Anyway, during this event, I was shooting for my friend Sarah Gregory and her sites and she asked if I wanted to do a scene with Adriana. Of course I said yes! The plot that she made up for us once again worked very, very well. Adriana was teasing me for being too babyish and always wearing overly cute things while she prefers to have a more grown up, sexy appearance. This is like, the core of a lot of our interactions in real life, to be honest, except it’s just playful teasing. In this video, we started really fighting, and our mom, played by Miss Anna, had to come and punish us for it.
I was in a kind of emotional mood that day (I don’t remember the reason, probably because I was at the event without Paul since he was still in England at the time) and I started crying real tears right away, even during the hand spanking! Whyyyyy could those tears not have come when I was getting bathbrushed? There are no answers to these questions.
7) Up All Night from Kitchen Sink Spanking
Another thing which I really loved in 2016 was the fact that my friend Princess Kelley made her return to shooting spanking videos! I got to shoot with her a handful of times, mostly with me directing her for Northern Spanking (but a few of her topping me there, too) and also when we shot for Real Spankings as mentioned earlier, where she topped me for quite a few scenes.
Kelley moved to the East Coast at the end of the summer, after having been a good friend who I enjoyed spending a lot of time with in LA. Before she left, we got together at her house to do one last shoot together, where we shot scenes for both Northern and for my side project, Kitchen Sink Spanking. KSS is sort of a hodgepodge of things, often becoming a home for scenes that we film that don’t otherwise fit in with Northern’s themes. It was originally a place that was meant to be about me, personally, though, so we filmed a couple of scenes with Kelley that fit that original concept.
In this scene, I’m Kelley’s roommate and I’m horribly irresponsible with my sleep schedule (again, we’re getting a little too real here with the sleep thing). Kelley gets up early to go to the gym and discovers that I’m still awake and lounging on the sofa. She decides that I can’t make good choices on my own, and that she’s going to spank me for staying up all night. She does exactly that, then makes me change into very childish pajamas to emphasize what a naughty little girl I’m being before strapping me and sending me off to bed. I really love the sort of forced ageplay theme, and Kelley and I had very good energy together for that.
Cheerleader Spankings just came out in 2016! It was (I think) the only new site this year and it was a very exciting launch. I had filmed some scenes for it before it was set up, and one of them is this scene, which features me and Maddy Marks.
Maddy is one of my favorite people to Top. I know her very well and we’ve been close friends for a long time, so I know how she likes to play. In fact, I think she was one of the very first people I ever topped, and she was definitely the first person I topped on camera. I was very excited to get to shoot this scene with her, since it was kind of darker, bullying scene, and that’s something that I really enjoy exploring. I like this when in both roles, but it’s something I’ve taken a strong interest in as a Top. I like the way that Maddy responds to having mean and unfair things done to her, and playing with her in this capacity has really let me learn how to let that side of myself loose.
In this scene, I’ve caught Maddy trying to blackmail me, and I’m going to really make her pay for it. I get to be quite bossy, and Maddy is caught in a bit of a pickle, since she can’t exactly protest against anything that I do to her, or else I’ll reveal her blackmailing scheme. She gets spanked, the hairbrush and a hard paddling, all of which I take great delight in dishing out.
Honestly, this is one of my favorite scenes I’ve done as a Top, period!
9) Three Girls Paddled After Gym from Real Spankings Institute (once again, this isn’t the real name, sorry)
Earlier in the day when I shot the “Rematch” scene I was talking about a few scenes ago, I got my customary school paddling that I always seem to get when I shoot for Real Spankings. School paddlings are tough. They’re a different kind of pain than most other spankings. It’s so much hurt coming down on you so suddenly. I don’t do these kinds of paddlings often, because there are few Tops who I feel comfortable taking them from (and at home, there’s a strong preferences for caning to fill the same kind of disciplinary niche).
The scene was planned so that Maddy, Harley and I were all going to be paddled and I was going to be the first one to go. In retrospect, that seems a little bit unfair to me: I probably should have volunteered to go to last, since sitting and waiting while you can hear your friends getting spanked is pretty intimidating, and I’m the only one of the three of us who had ever been paddled by Michael before, so that made me the senior girl out of us. I should have taken one for the team. But, at the time, no one thought of that (and I probably only thought of it now because it’s a theme that’s been coming up a lot in the erotica I’ve been reading, for full disclosure).
That all said, I know Michael Masterson very well, and he knows exactly how much I can take. When playing with him, that’s an awful lot. He didn’t know either of the other two girls, so I was probably in for the hardest spanking. We were to get ten swats total. The first five were from The Dean (that is to say, Michael) and the second set were from Miss Kelley. Kelley isn’t a soft paddler, either, but she and I have never played in such a limit pushing way, so I was less nervous about taking her swats, although I probably shouldn’t have been.
When we were all sitting outside the room listening to Michael and Kelley talk about how badly behaved we’d been and what they were going to do to us, I got very, very nervous. I hadn’t had a paddling like this in a long time and I knew that it was going to hurt, and a lot. The scene was very immersive, sitting in the chairs in the other room with the door open and listening to these authority figures talking about what was going to happen to us and knowing that it was going to happen soon. It was very, very, very my kink. I fell deep into the headspace of a naughty student awaiting discipline and in that moment, the whole thing became completely real for me. There’s no other way for me to say it. It didn’t feel like a fantasy at all. It just felt like I was in it, sitting in front of the Dean’s office awaiting an undeniable spanking. When I caught glances at my two friends, they looked very scared as well.
Honestly, it was one of the most immersive scene experiences I’ve ever had. I feel a feeling that I can only express as a love/hate relationship towards really intense and immersive scenes, but that’s not exactly accurate. I don’t feel this way about every scene, but in certain cases, when playing with people that I know well and know are able to bring me there, I want it to be really scary. I want to not like it. I want to truly wish that it was over, or that it wasn’t happening to me. I want to feel that scared and regretful “Why did I do such a dumb thing to get myself into trouble, I promise I’ll never misbehave again” feeling in my stomach. So, when a scene feels real, I don’t exactly like it while it’s happening. But I crave that headspace, and I love it pretty much the instant it’s finished. That headspace is rare for me, but it’s remarkable when it does come through, and it’s a memory that will remain gratifying for a long, long time.
It was my turn to come into the office and to bend over the desk to be paddled. The Dean told me to place my hands flat on the desk and to keep my feet on the floor. This is hard for me. I like to grip things and hold on for dear life, and I tend to kick my feet around a lot. He made it clear that if I moved in either way, I was going to get extra. In reality, I don’t know if he meant it or not, but I wasn’t in reality when this scene happened. I knew that I needed to be still, even though it was going to be hard to.
I had kind of stopped caring about being still and taking spankings “well” at some point. It generally looks more visually interesting on video if you move around a lot, so I had sorted of adopted that as a go-to. And I do like resisting. And I do like being overpowered. But I found in my head a space that I used to enjoy going to a lot, where I could overpower myself. I focused on that and told myself that I was not going to move.
The descriptions that I have for the first paddle swat are really, really cliche sounding. I feel like I saw stars, my whole mind alight with how hard the swat had been. I felt like I was physically moved forward by the force of it (which is kind of impressive because I’m not exactly a wisp of a girl). The air was practically knocked out of me, and I lingered in this very long second where I felt the impact before I felt the pain, and then everything went double fast in order to catch up. I made a truly pitiful noise and my knee buckled, but I didn’t take my hands or feet away from where they were supposed to be.
The second swat followed directly. It was still hard, but not as shockingly so. My wailing didn’t sound any less pathetic, though. The third swat brought me to tears, which was a relief. Crying felt right. It felt real. And it let some of the tension out of my body.
After the third swat, I knew I had two more to go before there was a break as the Tops switched. This meant that I was more than halfway to my first goal. I have a theory that I tell myself when I’m taking spankings and I get concerned that I can’t take what I’m getting: anyone can take ten swats with anything. This, of course, isn’t actually true, and the use of the word “anyone” can get a bit hairy if you think about it too hard, but it’s a useful thought to go to when things are (intentionally) overwhelming. But there is a sort of truth to it: a lot of “taking it” comes down to “letting it happen.” Accepting that this hurts. Not resisting or panicking. So I got myself to that point, and I cried a lot. The last two swats seemed close together in my mind.
We switched over to Kelley paddling me, and I was honestly a bit surprised by how hard her first swat was. I had kind of had the idea that because, in the real world, Kelley is a close friend of mine, that meant that she wasn’t going to punish me so severely. I don’t know where I got that idea from: it was wrong. My bottom was already incredibly sore from the swats that had come before and I was already in tears when she started spanking me, but at least my resistance was pretty gone. I counted each swat so carefully in my head. I actually made a little puddle of tears on the desk, I think. My palms were tremendously sweaty as they pressed against the desk’s surface. But I didn’t move.
When the paddling was over, I was told to go sit back outside and listen to Maddy and Harley as they got their spankings. I kept crying for a little while as I sat there, but I was a little bit less immersed in the scene. I was out of it just enough to be sky high happy about what an intense experience I had just had.
I was so sore when this scene was over. My butt felt swollen and like it should be absolutely purple. But by the time that my friends had finished receiving their punishments and we all lined up to show off our marks, I was hardly even pink. I appreciate the fact that my body recovers quickly in terms of color, because it allows me to continue to shoot after doing tough scenes like this. But it drives me crazy that I don’t get the satisfaction and gratification of having people look at my butt and know exactly how sore I am.
It’s probably no surprise that my favorite scene that I shot this year was for my own site. It was REALLY hard to pick a favorite because I really pour my heart and soul into everything that we do for Northern. This scene was particularly fun because it was a group scene that involved a lot of people that I really like: my friends Cupcake SinClair and Harley Havik, plus Violet October, who I got to know and become friends with because of this shoot. Plus, Paul was the Top, and he’s my favorite Top!
By Order of the Court was a custom film. It took a lot of planning to do: we had to rent a location, Violet flew in from Vegas for the shoot, and there were a ton of schedules to coordinate. I particularly like doing customs. I really enjoy the directing side of making a spanking video, and it’s fun to direct from someone else’s script. It just so happened that the script for this scene was a fantasy that I really enjoy: a judicial punishment. The film has no explicit setting but it has a generically English feeling, especially because of the fact that in addition to caning, one of us got the birch. The one of us was me!
This was my first proper birching. Previous to this I had gotten a few strokes from Pandora Blake during a photoset we did for Dreams of Spanking and Paul had given we a couple of strokes over my leggings when we were in the Inveraray Jail Museum in Scotland. They had a birching bench and a birch on display with a sign that said “please try.” It was the kinkiest museum of all time.
So, I was very curious to discover what full force strokes of the birch on the bare felt. I could take a guess and say that they were going to hurt.
When we arrived at the house that we had rented in order to do this film, we immediately started to look for branches that might be suitable for making birches. We pulled into the driveway, opened the house up, checked the rooms and then got right to work stripping long, thing, flexible branches off the trees. There had been no appropriate ones near our house. I could imagine that to an outside observer who didn’t know what we were doing it would seem like very odd proceedings.
Eventually, we decided that we couldn’t find enough branches there, either, so we drove to a nearby park. I was somewhat embarrassed to be looking for appropriate birch making materials in a public park, but Paul assured me that there was nothing weird about it. When he started stripping them down in the parking lot (BECAUSE HE HAS NO CHILL), someone came up to us and asked what we were doing. Paul lightheartedly joked that we were going to make a wreath. I don’t know if he was convinced or not.
We filmed the scene the next day. It involved the first three girls each getting 25 strokes of the cane, followed by me receiving my birching. First, we all had to strip naked, and I ended up directing parts of the scene that didn’t involve me that way. Porn life!
I enjoyed watching as Paul thrashed each of the girls before me. I was fascinated by watching their different reactions to the punishment. I’m particularly fond of watching him Top other girls. I don’t get to see the way that his body moves or his facial expressions when I’m the one getting spanked by him, and I love these things.
After watching him deliver 75 cane strokes, it was time for me to get my birching. I was nervous, but mostly excited to see what it would be like.
What it was like was extremely stingy. Despite being bundled together, it still bore almost no weight. It was the whippiness of a switch but spread across a wider area of my bottom. It did have less bite because of that. It still left me whimpering and gasping. When it was finished, I was a little endorphin high and very sore. My friends were obviously in similar states.
In order to prevent this post from being EVEN LONGER THAN IT ALREADY IS I only included pictures from my segment of this scene. The full scene is over 40 minutes long, but the whole thing is extremely engaging to watch. I highly recommend it. It was, in fact, my favorite scene I did this year!
WAAAH! So much for having free time and staying caught up! Life has remained in whirlwind mode pretty constantly since my last post. I started this one in the beginning of June, but damnit, I’m going to finish it!
So, a couple of months ago I had a super fun adventure that I’m going to talk about now. In the past year or so, fellow spanking model Adriana Evans and I have been getting closer and closer. In addition to being a spanking fetishist, Adriana is an ABDL (Adult Baby/Diaper Lover for those of you who don’t know). As I’ve become closer friends with Adriana, I’ve gotten the chance to get to know some of the awesome people that she’s friends with from that side of her kink (and, as a side note, I’ve had some fun exploring it myself with said friends).
First, I got the chance to spend some time with Ally Cakes, who became a fast friend of mine. We have a lot of interests in common and when she visited us in LA to shoot for Northern Spanking the first time, we spent tons of time talking and hanging out and became very close. Earlier this year, Ally came to visit and shoot with us a second time, and that connection grew even more. Although Ally has done plenty of ABDL modeling, her first shoot with us was her first time dipping her toe into the spanking video scene, and she did an awesome job. She’s just so cute!
Adriana, Ally and I became a little group of friends, texting each other a lot (mostly about cute things) and buying matching stuffed animals, et cetera. It was through these two that I was introduced to Ava Nicole, or misspandapants.
As soon as I saw Ava I knew that I wanted to shoot with her. She’s just adorable, and I was assured that although she was coming from the same situation as Ally (having done ABDL videos but never having done a spanking video) that she liked to be spanked. Since she lives elsewhere on the West Coast, she wasn’t *too* far away from us, so we decided to ask her if she’d want to come down to shoot. Since she was only going to be shooting with us and didn’t have any other plans in LA, I thought I’d offer to take her to Disneyland, too. Because who doesn’t love Disneyland? I figured it would be a good way for us to get to know each other better before the shoot, too, to make it a little less weird to just show up with some friends-of-friends and get spanked.
The problem came with how creepy I felt saying “Hey, I will take you to Disneyland if you fly down here and let us spank you.” Adriana and Ally assured me that it was the kind of creepy that Ava wouldn’t mind, so I got the nerve up to send the email. Lo and behold! Ava was up for coming to LA and was not creeped out by my offer to go to Disneyland. Maybe it just sounds like something that someone who wants to abduct you would offer to me? I dunno.
I started planning this shoot a bit before Paul came back, and it was one of the first shoots we did once he returned to the US. I was a little bit nervous on the way to pick Ava up from the airport. I’m always a bit concerned that people aren’t going to like me, and when I’m wearing my Producer Hat I’m also always cognizant of making sure that models, especially new models, are comfortable and having a good experience. But as soon as I met Ava, I knew we were going to get along. She’s just as nice as she is cute!
We spent a lot of the evening chatting and getting to know each other. It really helped that we were close with the same people already. As the visit progressed, it became clear that although Adriana, Ally, Ava and I (the A-Team?) had never all hung out, through both common experience and the magic of the internet, we were able to become mutually friends. They’re all such special girls and I feel so lucky to have gotten to know them. ^_^
Anyway, the next day, Ava and I went to Disneyland. It was a really, really awesome day. She had never been before, and it’s the most fun to go to Disneyland with people who don’t go all the time because they’re impressed with everything :P. Adding to the excitement for us was the fact that a bunch of baby ducks had just hatched and were running around all over the place being cute. :3 The baby ducks pictures didn’t turn out very well, so here’s us being cute instead:
The lines weren’t particularly bad that day, so we were able to do almost all of the fun stuff and still had extra time left. We ended up exploring Toon Town, which I usually don’t do, but we were definitely in the right headspace for it. We ran around and climbed on things and I got in Pluto’s dog bed, because cute.
The night normally ends with Fireworks, but we still needed to find a couple of souvenirs so even though we stayed in the park until it was closed, we ended up hanging out in the open-later-than-late-because-we-want-you-to-buy-stuff store searching for something for a shot glass. Because Disney is too family friendly for drinking, apparently (despite the fact that you can get REALLY unintentionally trashed on the drinks in the cove bar because they are potent with alcohol, but I digress) shot glasses are referred to as “toothpick holders” there. It took us a long time to find some, but by then we were determined. When we finally did, they weren’t that great, but at least we’d accomplished the mission? Then, as we were leaving, going out the same door that we came into the store through, we realized that literally the first table we walked past had exactly what we had been looking for on it. ihusfhsfhsnijbhksksguhseohur!!! Fail! We ended up going back in line and exchanging the one that Ava had picked out for the new one. It was a little ridiculous, but we were laughing the whole time.
The next day was our shoot day. Between the time that we booked the shoot with Ava and the actually shoot, a conversation had taken place with my very good friend Princess Kelley. Kelley had been retired from doing videos for several years, but had recently started thinking about possibly doing them again and had come to the conclusion that she was definitely up for it, but only wanted to appear as a Top. This conversation more than likely took place over pie or pancakes at our favorite hang out, but I’m not 100 percent on that detail anymore. But it’s likely.
I was thrilled that Kelley wanted to start doing videos again because she was so great at it! In such a short time spent filming, she had really made a mark on the spanking video world. Plus, having hung out with her for the past couple of years, I’ve come to be *very* fond of watching her give spankings. Her scolding is so perfect. A lot of her favorite scenes aren’t the kinds that I necessarily think of as my favorites, but watching her do them always leaves me unable to shut up about how hot they are. So, knowing that the shoot with Ava was coming up, I asked Kelley if she’d want to Top for most of the F/F scenes that we were planning and she said yes! I was a little overjoyed that in one shoot we’d be getting to work with a brand new-to-spanking model *and* do Kelley’s first shoot back in front of the camera. It was obviously destined to be something special.
Ava and I were surprisingly chipper on the day of the shoot given our long day at Disneyland. Our first few scenes involved Paul topping Ava and me doing camera and photography. I like to think that I’m getting better at both of these skills. I only took one unit of film production when I was in school and I spent a lot of that making a stop motion video of a cuddly moose and a cuddly polar bear playing checkers (of course I did, also the polar bear won) but I’ve had very good teachers now that I’m learning by doing: Paul has been making spanking porn for like 15 years or something like that and Rafa is a remarkably talented cameraman who actually did take and pay attention to tons of production classes at school. Being the only person on camera gets a little stressful for me sometimes, but I think everything from that morning turned out very well. A couple of previews, although you’ll have already seen more if you’re following me on tumblr:
Kelley then came over and we did the two girls’ first scene together, which is the one which is already out on Northern Spanking and our clips4sale, called “A Different Spoon.” The story is about Ava, who plays Kelley’s younger sister, trying to live up to her sister’s reputation as a good baker by volunteering to make the cakes for the school bake sale despite having no idea how to bake. As a Top, Kelley really excels at scenes that are caring and for-your-own-good. In this scene she really nailed that, not just scolding Ava for being irresponsible but emphasizing the importance of being her own person and embracing who she really is, not feeling like she has to do everything her big sister does. Plus, the spanking was delightfully hard. While watching, I found myself making Dale Cooper-esque thumbs ups to Paul, who was on the other camera, to signify that I was super happy with the way the scene was going.
Here are a couple of the pictures from that scene:
Plus, some behind the scenes photos that I took while Paul was taking the above photos:
We took a break for lunch, which we spent chatting in addition to eating and getting to know each other better (aside from Kelley and I, who already know each other pretty well, lol). During lunch, there was a knock on the door and a package was delivered. It was a bunch of school uniforms that I had ordered from online. I opened them up and enjoyed how cute they were. After lunch, we did a couple of other scenes with Kelley as the top, including Ava’s first on camera caning. For that scene, she was originally supposed to wear a gingham school dress that I got when I was in England, but those dresses can be hard to fit because they don’t really stretch in the chest at all and they’re designed for actually children. It was squishing Ava’s boobs a lot and it was not the best look. Fortunately, an alternate school dress had arrived during lunch, so we were able to use that the day we got it: something which never happens because I’m pretty addicted to buying more cute clothes for shoots than we can actually use -_-.
Plus, we had to get a scene of me spanking Ava, and one of Kelley spanking me, obviously. These two are photosets, and they’re both currently up on Northern Spanking.
There were other scenes shot, but I won’t spoil all the surprises there. You’ll have to wait and see. I personally find the final scene we shot that day hilarious as it’s chock full of inside jokes, but I’ll save that one and post the background story once it comes out because the story will make more sense if you’re actually able to watch the video.
Somehow, we all ended up in bras before the day was done, though:
After Kelley went home Paul, Ava and I did some decompressing, then went out for steak and drinks. Post shoot meals are always a lot of fun, and usually involve looking at all the photos that were taken that day on the camera while trying to pretend that you’re DEFINITELY NOT LOOKING AT PORN IN A PUBLIC PLACE (sidenote, all I ever do is look at porn in a public place).
Then, we came home and Ava and I drank good wine out of sippy cups. I mean, what else would you do after a hard day of work, really?!
The next day we had sushi for lunch and then took Ava back to the airport so she could head home. I haven’t gotten to see her again since, but we’ve chatted lots and lots in a girls’ group text with Ally, Adriana, Ava and I. Rumor has it, the gang will all get to be in one place for the first time ever for some spanking holiday that takes place in early September… I wonder what that could be?!
Hi everyone! Remember me?
I feel terrible that I haven’t updated my blog in a long time. It’s been far longer than I’ve ever let it go before. I’ve obviously remained active on social media, posting to my tumblr and Twitter accounts regularly with mini updates about my life. But it’s been a long time since I’ve written anything here.
It started out where every day I’d think “Oh man, I never updated my blog!” and then I started adding “Blog post” to my weekly to-do list instead of my daily one. Then, it got to a point where I wasn’t even bothering to add it to the list anymore: I knew I wasn’t going to get around to it.
I’ve been very busy recently, and I’ve had an unfortunate series of issues with my health. At one point, I was convinced that it was something really serious, and I was quite worried about it, to say the least. I’m happy to say that after a long series of non-sexy doctor’s visits and tests, I’ve been able to get things pretty much straightened out and I’m no longer feeling badly or worrying about that.
During that time, I got behind on a lot of projects and stuff, and I’m now working to get myself totally caught up. I still have a few things to do, but it’s a relief to be at least close to the feeling of being on top of things.
Meanwhile, my creative juices have been flowing a lot recently (side note: that’s the dirtiest sentence ever, when you think about where most of my creativity comes from) but I’ve been primarily funneling them into Northern Spanking. I’ve been writing lots of the scenes that we’ve been shooting, and we’ve been shooting a lot recently.
Throughout all this, my poor little blog has been sitting off in the corner, getting no love from me. It’s hard: once I let something go a while, then I just start feeling so guilty about the fact that I haven’t been doing it and that makes me want to avoid it and it’s just a vicious cycle.
But, it’s time to break that cycle and start sharing with you guys again. So, here are a few fast facts:
-For those of you who don’t know, Paul and I got engaged in January when I was visiting him in England. REALLY exciting stuff! I’m just over the moon happy about it. I love him so much, and getting married to him is a dream come true. *heart eyes*
Nothing is going to change in terms of any of my other relationships or my work life when I get married. I’ll still shoot, I’ll still do sessions, I’ll still play with other people, I’ll still have relationships with other people. A huge part of the reason that Paul and I work so well together is because he supports the things that make me happy. I’m just going to have a supportive husband instead of a supportive partner. I’ll probably just be brighter and bubblier all the time.
So, that’s the biggest news! Paul was in England for literally five months this time, so the fact that he’s back now is also pretty big news to me. He got home in April, so he’s been home for a little over a month. I’m getting used to having him back, and it’s been really good to get to spend time together. Our cats are happy about it, too. They really missed him. I’m not even making that up. They love him more than they love me, I think.
There will be posts about other stuff that’s happened since I last posted…last year coming up soon (probably). But tomorrow Paul and I are shooting with Ami Mercury. In case you aren’t familiar with her, Ami is an East Coast based spanking model who shoots primarily with Punished Brats. We’ve got some fun scenes planned for the day. I’ve never had the chance to meet Ami before, so I’m looking forward to that. She’s going to be in town for Domcon, which starts this weekend.
Alas, I won’t be able to attend Domcon this year, as it’s the same weekend as the Lone Star Spanking Party in Houston, which Paul and I will be taking off for on Wednesday. I have a busy calendar while I’m there, but if you’re a Houston based spanko or you’re going to be at the party and you’re interested in having a session with me, shoot me an email sooner rather than later, while there still is a bit of room left on the calendar.
A highlight of this upcoming weekend is the fact that Paul and I are sharing a room with Adrianna Evans and Ally Cakes. Adrianna and Ally have become really close friends of mine recently, but we actually haven’t hung out in the same place since the first time that I met Ally at Adrianna’s house over a year ago.
I’m sure that there won’t be ANY mischief in our room with the three of us in one place, right? Actually, I’m just hoping that Paul can handle the three of us.
I’m looking forward to seeing lots of other friends, doing a bunch of shooting (wearing both my producer hat and my modeling hat) and playing with lots of lovely people.
For a long time, I was struggling with a low tolerance. It sort of came out of nowhere and became a really big problem for me. It was becoming almost laughable how little I could take. But this will be my first party since I’ve pretty much regained that. The only thing that I’ve noticed is that while my tolerance during a spanking is the same as it once was (although I’ll probably never have the same tolerance that I used to have at the very height of my hard play days, since I think that about 75 percent of the nerves in my butt were just temporarily destroyed or something) the pain seems to linger around longer, which I can’t say I mind. There’s something very satisfying about going to bed sore and waking up sore the next morning. My point with this is that it will be nice to be at a party where I can actually play outside of pre-arranged engagements more than just a little bit without feeling totally worn out, although I guess I do still have to pace myself a bit.
I also have to pack tomorrow night after the shoot. I have some super cute stuff for this party (the themes include “soda shop” and “1950’s prom” and I am very well prepared for both of these) and I just need to get it all together. But I just hate packing so much. You’d think that a person who travels as much as I do would be good at packing and unpacking. But you’d be lying to yourself, because I’m still terrible at it.
Anyway, there you have it. A blog post! It’s kind of all over the place, but at least it exists.
I’ll be straight forward about this: it gets harder for me to want to update my blog as opposed to other forms of social media because I often feel like I get way less feedback and interaction here for way more effort. I feel like a big loser saying “please leave comments” but an occasional note to let me know that the people who read this blog aren’t all spam robots would not be unappreciated. 😉
It’s good to be back, guys!
It’s been a long time since I’ve updated my blog. I miss you all!
Things have been busy over here, recently. Honestly, I don’t really know where the time goes. The time since my last post seems like a blur. It’s only by looking back at my calendar and the pictures that I took that I can remind myself of as much that happened as possible.
Shortly after the release of The Sheriff’s Little Girl, in the end of September, I headed out of town for a few days. I was doing an extended session with someone who is also a great friend, so it’s a lovely way to spend some time. The day after I got back, I got together with a new friend. She had emailed me after reading my blog and lived not far from me, so we met up and hung out. We went to the mall together and walked around, chatting about video games, cats, and of course, spanking. It was a really fun afternoon, and it was great to make a new connection through This Thing We Do.
That night, Paul and I had some much needed play time:
The next day, Paul and I drove down to Orange County so that he could pick up the car that he bought. Paul loves cars, and he spent a long time deliberating about what sort to get here in America. I’m quite pleased with the one that he chose: I think it suits him quite well!
I haven’t had a chance to get spanked in or over it yet, but I’m looking forward to it.
That night, we met up with Spankcake in order to help Erica Scott’s partner, John, surprise her for her birthday. We went to an amazing Japanese restaurant in the Hollywood Hills with an awesome view. We had champagne and Spankcake and I shared sushi (as usual for us!). Most importantly, we got to celebrate Erica, who we love so much. I’m not going to go into too much detail about the night, since this post is basically a clips show of the past six weeks, but you can read Erica’s account of it here. I will say that it was a truly amazing night, and some of the most fun I’ve had in a long time. John’s love and affection for Erica and his pleasure at seeing her so happy is something that always makes me smile when I recall it.
The next day we had the adorable Linny Lace over for a shoot! In case you aren’t familiar with Linny, she’s a pretty new spanking model based in Los Angeles. She did her first spanking shoot with Paul and I for Northern last spring. She’s super cute and very sweet, and I was happy to have her back for another shoot. If you use tumblr, you can follow her there.
This day, we were experimenting with producing content for someone else: they had seen me posting about custom videos available and had emailed me asking if I would film content for their site. We gave it a go. The plan was to shoot half the day for this other site and half the day for NS. It wound up being a *very* long day, but Linny was such a trooper. Because we had commitments to the other site, we only ended up being able to do one video for us, but it was a very fun one: our Halloween special.
This film was all my idea. Paul isn’t particularly enthusiastic about Halloween, but I definitely am. It’s one of my favorite holidays because I love dressing up. I kind of miss being young enough to be able to go door to door trick-or-treating, to be perfectly honest. So, I wrote a video about Linny and I having done that. In it, we’re American girls living in England, where the trick-or-treating is not so strong (and you get people like Paul and John Osborne being grumps about Halloween). I imagined that we’d want to participate in some of the mischief night aspects of the holiday and that our neighbors, and the local authorities, would not be so keen on that idea.
The video started with us sitting on the rug and sorting out our candy from our very full treat bags. This was a very thinly veiled excuse for us to have to buy two treat bags worth of Halloween candy, I’ll admit it, but it was all in the name of verisimilitude! Paul, our guardian, then interrupted us, having just gotten off the phone with the police about our criminal mischief involving egging houses and wrapping trees in toilet paper (admittedly, that’s a worse offense in the UK than in Southern California when you think about how rain works). Of course, we had to be severely punished, and we were both spanked and then caned.
We got to wear Halloween costumes in this, of course: Linny brought a really amazing Red Riding Hood costume that she made herself, and I wore my Hello Kitty costume from last year:
The next few days were full of sessions, working on my current Work in Progress, admin stuff and my butt wearing these shorts:
Shooting for two sites in one day is long, but we got a lot of good stuff done! The scenes that we did for KSS probably won’t be released for a while, but you can see a couple pictures anyway:
And here are a couple from Good Spanking (these videos are currently live on the site):
Do you like my bunny slippers? I’m kind of in love with them. They were a gift from someone awesome off my Amazon Wishlist. I kinda wish I could wear them every day.
We took that Sunday off, but on Monday, it was time to shoot again! This time, we shot with Cupcake SinClair. I had never met Cupcake, but I realized as soon as I met her that she was seriously sweet: the name suits! She’s so spunky and full of energy, and she was such a pleasure to work with. We’re definitely going to have her back for a longer shoot in the future. We did scenes for both Northern Spanking and for her site (linked earlier in this paragraph). It’ll be a little while before we get to introduce her on the site, but I’m excited for it, because the videos we did are totally great.
We had a lot of behind the scenes fun and giggles:
And here’s a picture of Paul and I being cute together off camera:
I had probably too much fun spanking her. This girl has a serious tolerance, so I got to use my meanest hairbrush, the one I try to avoid getting spanked with as much as possible!
The day after that, we drove down to Orange County to meet up with one of the ladies I’ve been friends with in the spanking community for the longest: Lily Starr. She was in town to do sessions, and I jumped at the chance to do a shoot with her! We did scenes for Lily Starr Spanking, Northern Spanking and Kitchen Sink Spanking.
One of the scenes that we did for Lily’s site was particularly fun: we got to wear Halloween costumes again! I had hoped that we could both dress up as slutty bears, as I had ordered stuff for a slutty polar bear costume to wear later in the month and Lily had a slutty panda outfit. However, the postal service failed me and my box arrived a day too late. Fortunately, Lily had some cute slutty Disney girl outfits that we wore instead.
In the scene, Lily was my friend (very much like in real life, in fact) and we had a Halloween party at my house. We spiked the punch and things got a bit out of control. Except we were playing as teens, so it was quite a big deal, and Paul (who played my dad) was super not thrilled to have a house full of drunken teenagers. I knew I was in for a spanking, but I didn’t know he was also going to punish my friend. We both got it very hard, too.
This film is special because it’s actually the first time that Lily and I have ever been spanked together on camera, despite having been filming together since 2011. We finally got to fix that!
We also did a really cute scene where Lily was my strict Aunt, who punished me for disobedience and bad language (and I got to wear my bunny slippers again):
And we did some cute scenes for Northern with Lily getting spanked by Paul. I love watching her get spanked because she has such sweet and genuine reactions.
That night, when we were finished shooting, we took some much needed alone time and snuck off to Disneyland, since we were pretty close by. We got dinner, watched the fireworks and went on a few rides. It was something we so needed! Even though we work together, it gets stressful to not get to also spend some down time together, and it was the refreshment that I needed, since there was a lot more busyness coming right up.
Despite my best efforts at brevity, I’m not going to be able to fit everything that’s happened into one post like I originally planned. Hopefully it won’t be another six weeks before I post again!
Before I go for the night, I have a couple things to add:
First, if you have a tumblr blog and you want to share the pictures featured in this post, that’s cool. Here’s what you need to do if you’re going to do that:
1) Put www.alexinspankingland.com as the source on the picture.
2) Not use them to advertise for something else, claim them as your own work/pictures of you or add a fictional story in which you rename me or make up a background for the picture (I’m sharing my life with you and don’t feel comfortable with it being used for these things, so please respect that).
3) Ideally, tag me @alexinspankingland so I can reblog your post. 🙂
The other thing:
Big thank you to the three people who left me blog comments while I was away, and to everyone who kept visiting this blog, keeping the traffic surprisingly high for a place that wasn’t being updated. I really appreciate you guys. I would *love* to get comments more often, even just saying hi. Engaging back and forth is so much more fun than just rambling about myself into a void. 🙂 Part of the reason that I use tumblr more often these days is because I get so much feedback and participation from people (admittedly some of it is totally dick, but most is great). I guess the real reason is because it takes a few minutes to add a post there where as this one took me almost two hours and hours are pretty hard to come by these days. But the fact that I get to interact with people there is really rewarding.
Everyone remember last winter when England passed new regulations making the production of spanking, bondage, BDSM and several other kinds of positive, consensual adult videos illegal? It got talked about a lot at the time, and then it stopped being talked about so much. The law remained exactly the same, though, and it continued to effect UK based producers, having huge impacts on their lives.
Those who had to move their sites (or themselves) out of the country because of it have had big, bureaucratic messes and a lot of expenses to deal with. Those who didn’t have that option or who decided that their best choice was to remain in the UK have had even more stress to deal with: the fear of what’s going to happen next. I can’t imagine how much strain it puts on someone to know that the thing they’ve dedicated themselves to, invested all their time, creative energy and money in, has been made illegal and could possibly be taken away from them. It breaks my heart to think about, really.
So, when Pandora Blake and Nimue Allen started a fundraiser to support Backlash-UK, an organization that can offer legal aid to producers who find themselves in court because of these ridiculous regulations, I was glad to help out. I encouraged everyone who enjoys this blog to donate to the campaign, promising to give something back to the community in exchange for your help.
The deal was this: for every £10 donated, one cane stroke would be given. It started out with Pandora and Nimue each taking up to 50 cane strokes each. When those goals were reached, popular spanking and bondage model Amelia Jane Rutherford/Ariel Anderssen (same person, two names) volunteered to take 25 strokes, and Rosie Bottomley signed up for another 50. I was next to volunteer. If another £500 were donated, I’d be taking 50 strokes.
The fundraiser ended up collecting a total of £3,836. For those who don’t know, that’s about $5,700 that was donated in about a month’s time, or 767% of the original £500 goal. I was proud that I’d be getting all the strokes I had signed up for.
I had to wait until Paul got back from the UK to get caned, though, and once he got back, it didn’t happen right away. We we had houseguests, then we went out of town, then I had to shoot a lot of things, both for myself and other sites. Besides, you have to be in a good headspace to take such a severe caning.
Fifty cane strokes is A LOT to me these days. I was excited about what I had agreed to do, but very apprehensive. I could have signed up for a lower maximum, but I wanted to push myself. I do like playing hard, and I actually really like longer scenes, especially once I get into that headspace, but I don’t play that way very often anymore. I often get hung up on worries about marking or leaving myself too sore, or I get caught up in memories of times that weren’t enjoyable when I played hard. Over the past few years, it’s become increasingly harder for me to let go during longer, harder scenes.
So, I was nervous and apprehensive before my caning. Every one of the models who took sponsored canings reacted to the event differently. Most of the others I’ve watched seemed to enjoy it, some made sounds of pleasure, others giggled. I cried, but this wasn’t a bad thing.
Crying has always been a natural reaction to spanking and other corporal punishment for me, and for a long time, a crying headspace replaced a more traditional subspace for me when I was most relaxed during a scene. When the caning started, I was feeling a little nervous and a little shy about it. It hurt. The word that comes to my mind to describe the way that the cane feels is “spongy” which I know is very bizarre sounding. But the pain flexes and bends, swells and grows, like it’s absorbing into the other tissues in my body, welts raising up in a way that makes all of my body awareness focus on them.
I soon discovered that I needed the harsh, pulsing pain that was biting into my bottom. My crying was fueled by pain, but it was also relieving. It was almost therapeutic, like all my frustrations about ATVOD were manifested into something tangible, something that I knew that I could cope with.
Fifty strokes went by much more quickly than I expected it to. While at the beginning I was worried that I would never be able to take that many, I found that by the end I was in a space where I was almost surprised by the ending. Adrenaline and endorphins had kicked in, and despite my tears, I felt very still inside. Paul wrapped me up to cuddle on his lap and all was right with the world.
Doing something that I had, if just temporarily, worried I couldn’t do made me feel more confident about my ability to accomplish other things in my life, too, and gave me a little confidence boost.
So, now you get to watch the video! Click on this link to watch it streaming, or right click to save it to your computer. You’re welcome to reupload it and share it, but please provide credit and don’t re-edit it.
I hope you enjoy it! If you feel inclined to do something to help out, you can donate directly to Backlash-UK by clicking on the link on their page (no one will get caned though, sorry).
You can also support the producers who have been affected by these laws by joining their sites. Some examples include:
In December, a law came into effect in the UK which made the production of spanking videos, along with a variety of other kinds of porn, illegal. There was a lot of public outcry at the time, and spankos from all over the world offered their emotional support to the UK based producers. People signed petitions. People went to protests.
Then, eventually, things slowed down and, as a community, we generally stopped talking about this. That’s what happens with all political issues: very rarely do we stop actively talking about them because something gets fixed. We stop talking about them because we’ve run out of momentum, or things to say, or ideas of how to get things fixed. Continuing to talk about it, then, makes us feel hopeless. A much worse a reason why we stop talking about things is because we get used to them. We accept that this is simply the way things are. We stop thinking about it.
Unless, of course, you can’t stop thinking about it because it directly affects you. For the average spanko, the law change made us angry or uncomfortable. But for UK based spanking and fetish producers, it changed everything. I don’t know all the producers, and not all of them share what’s going on in their lives online, but here’s a recap of the information that I have right now (if you have more information than I do, please feel free to chime in in the comments section!):
There are other producers in the UK, but I don’t have any updates on how they’re dealing with this issue. If you know any, please add them in the comment section!
Nimue and Pandora announced a little while ago that they’re doing a fundraiser for Backlash UK, an organization that, among other things, provides legal aid for producers affected by the new ATVOD law. The fundraiser started off with a goal of 500 Pounds. For each ten pound donation, one of the two would receive one cane stroke, with a maximum of 50 strokes being received per girl. When the fundraising reached 1000 pounds, the maximum amount of strokes set to be received, Rosie Bottomley stepped up to take the next 50 strokes. When THAT goal was surpassed, Amelia Jane Rutherford agreed to take an additional 25 strokes. This goal has also been passed now.
So who do the additional cane strokes fall to? Well, they fall to me, of course.
I had the rare chance to have a skype chat with Pandora this afternoon. Because we’re both always keeping busy (her especially!) and we’re 8 hours of timezones apart, we almost never get a chance to make our schedules line up, so it was wonderful that we did. When we talked today, she told me everything that was going on with the fundraiser and explained that they had raised more funds than they had models to take the cane strokes, I was both overjoyed with their success and happy to help out. I’m an American, but this law has changed my life, too, and technically speaking, I’m a producer of a traditionally UK based site now. Besides, British spanking pornography means an awful lot to me. I was happy to put my butt on the line, quite literally!
So, everyone, click here to donate to Pandora’s fundraiser! You can donate no matter where you are located in the world. Ten pounds is about fifteen US dollars, and each 15 dollar donation adds a cane stroke for me! The caning will be filmed after Paul returns to the US, and the video including Pandora, Nimue, Rosie, Amelia and I all getting caned (although not at the same time and place) will be made available to everyone for free! Really, who DOESN’T want to see me get fifty cane strokes for a good cause? That’s an awful lot! So, please donate!
When you think about it, your donation doesn’t just ensure that I’ll be getting an additional cane stroke: it helps to provide countless more cane strokes in the future by helping to make sure that British spanking pornography is able to continue on in the world. More writing on this topic coming tomorrow, but I was kind of wrestling with blogger for a couple of days, so I got behind on my posting and now that I’m participating in this fund raiser, I want to get the word out before it’s too late!
So, let’s talk about the new ATVOD law that came into effect in the UK on Monday. I’d guess that many of you have already heard a lot about it, and if you read Pandora Blake’s blog you’ve already read much more cogent and significant writing than what I’m about to present here, but I long ago came to the conclusion that there’s no reason not to talk about something just because others have already done an excellent job of it. Besides, this issue needs all the media attention it can get, and I’m still seeing misinformation about the situation being passed around on social media.
People on twitter and Fetlife have been talking about the UK’s “spanking ban” or “porn ban.” These terms aren’t actually very accurate. The ATVOD law is a piece of legislature which limits what sorts of sexual activities can be presented in “video on demand”, a category which includes basically all forms of internet pornography: streaming and downloads on membership sites and pay-per-download videos hosted on sites like clips4sale and even content which is given out for free.
The law has been talked about a lot in the spanking community because it directly affects us: one of the things prohibited by the law is the infliction of any kind of pain inducing activity which is beyond “transient and trifling” and which leaves any mark on the body beyond slight reddening of the skin (welts, bruises… basically marks). This sums up most of the spanking content produced anywhere in the world. But the term “spanking ban” isn’t really the right one to use for two reasons. First of all, someone unaware of the situation reading that might come to the erroneous conclusion that spanking itself has been banned in the UK. It has not. That’s actually one of the things which is upsetting about the law: things which are perfectly legal to perform are illegal to film and distribute. The second reason is because while the prohibition of spanking in pornography is the part that will most directly affect most of us, the list of acts that are classified as “extreme pornography” is long and it includes a lot of things that are problematic. The term “porn ban” is also not entirely correct. Not all porn has been made illegal. Only a lot of the interesting stuff.
Spanking producers anywhere in the world have been dealing with a certain form of censorship for as long as internet spanking porn has existed. What we can and can’t show on film has been previously decided for us not by our governments, but by the companies that we use to process credit cards. CCBill, Clips4Sale and other companies that producers use to receive payment used to be the primary people who set the rules for what could and couldn’t be offered online.
Their rules restrict a lot of kinks, but are actually, by comparison, fairly permissive towards spanking porn: they prohibit showing any blood for any reason, limit what kind of ageplay scenarios can be presented, get fussy about words signifying blood relationships (“father,” “mother,” “brother,” “sister” et cetera) and force us to be careful about what words we use to talk about force and consensual non consent. They can also prohibit what is and isn’t too extreme in terms of marking, but it usually doesn’t come up.
Except, of course, for the time that it did. In 2013, CCBill forced Pandora Blake to remove a handful of scenes from Dreams of Spanking and to make changes to all the language used on the site, getting rid of words like “little girl” and “forced.” She had to comply or lose her ability to make money from her site, but she wasn’t being pushed into this by the law. She responded by making the content available for free on Darker Dreams.
Now that censorship is being enforced by the government and not just by corporations, this sort of work around isn’t possible anymore: like I mentioned before, UK producers can’t even give the content away for free. In addition to that, because making this content is illegal it doesn’t just mean that breaking the laws will result in your site being taken down (which in and of itself is disastrous for a producer, since for almost everyone I know producing spanking videos their site is their full time job and primary source of income) but in actual legal action being taken against the producers. As far as I understand the law (and feel free to correct me if I don’t have a proper understanding of it) someone could actually, hypothetically go to jail for making illegal, “extreme” pornography.
Looking at the law directly doesn’t tell you exactly what is and isn’t permitted in an easy to find manner because the law works by classifying internet pornography under the standards of censorship which had previously only applied to films released in cinema or on DVD: this is the reason why most UK spanking producers either don’t offer DVDs or sell them semi secretly. I referred to this blog post, which carefully breaks down what material is and isn’t permitted. The list is seriously problematic:
Peeing and female ejaculation are lumped together into one category, with the same rules applying to urine and to female ejaculatory fluid. This just shows a lack of sex education on the part of the people responsible for this legislature, because these two things are entirely different. Both are still permitted as long as they aren’t done onto another person, or then consumed. Squirting during sex is alright if it is “brief” and “isolated.”
This is an enormous problem because squirting isn’t even something that you set out to do, necessarily. It’s part of some women’s physiological response to sexual stimulus. This is a rule that will only affect female-centric porn that features female performers genuinely enjoying themselves (I don’t know anyone who can fake squirt, personally). You can have a brief squirt here and there, but can’t intentionally do it on anyone. And peeing, which is a widely popular fetish, can only be done in isolation from other people. This affects some spanking videos. There’s a cross over between the wetting fetish and the spanking fetish, specifically for girls wetting themselves while being spanked. It’s something people are very divided on, but I personally think this is totally hot. The scenes where one wets oneself while over a lap being spanked are doubly prohibited.
There isn’t actually a health risk associated with any of this behavior, either, even if we’re talking about drinking pee. Although some people may find it gross (it’s not my thing, personally) it isn’t any more likely to spread disease than lots of other things that we are totally allowed to do in porn (like kissing or having sex). You can’t ban something because you think it’s gross.
Of course, any consumption of male ejaculation is entirely fine. I don’t even understand how this makes sense. I feel that it’s blatantly sexist, and is implying that male centric, heteronormative porn is acceptable and that female centric porn is “extreme” and therefore deserving of censorship. On a related note, facesitting has been forbidden. This is apparently because if you try this on your own at home, you might die by having the airway blocked.
Interestingly, throat fucking, which also can be potentially dangerous in terms of blocking the airway, is entirely acceptable. The act which shows male pleasure is allowed, but the one which shows female pleasure is banned. You however, aren’t allowed to tell someone to “gag on your cock” because it refers to blocking the airway, whether you are doing it or not. Gags in general, especially when associated with bondage are prohibited. Bondage as a whole is mostly against the law, especially when it isn’t explicitly part of a roleplay scenario. I get the impression that behind the scenes material and context building items like interviews and performer blog posts don’t count for demonstrating consent here, just explicitly defining it on camera, which makes fantasy based bondage scenes illegal.
Fisting has been entirely forbidden. You cannot insert five fingers past the first knuckle into someone’s body. Again, this is a popular feature in female centric porn, and there’s no evidence that it’s actually medically dangerous.
There are quite a few other things on the list, but this blog post will be infinitely long if I talk about all of them, so let me come to the most relevant: BDSM pain play is only permissible if it is “transient and trifling.” Like I said before, this means no marks and less visible severity of any kind. I don’t just mean spanking, I mean any kind of kinky shit that hurts someone.
The supposed reason for this and for most of the other regulations is someone might try to replicate this at home and cause harm or death. This is a strange argument. For one thing, you can watch depictions of lots of things that you really shouldn’t try to do yourself, like almost everything in every movie and TV show ever. For some reason, they seem to believe that the general public can grasp the idea that you shouldn’t replicate the things that you see in a standard film, but that people will do dangerous and harmful things if they replicate that which is presented in pornography. I feel that if this was the real concern, it should just suffice to add a little caption on the bottom of the screen that reads “professional fuckers on a closed set, do not try this at home.”
In a certain way, by saying this, the British government is making all pornographers de facto sex educators. If they truly believe that people will replicate what they see in porn, shouldn’t they be celebrating sex positive porn, female centric porn and consensual, safe kink porn? Instead, these are the sites that they are criminalizing. Porn which shows a man with a perfect dick fucking a girl with a perfect body in a scene where he never attempts to please her, she moans in a way which is obviously fake and he then pulls out and ejaculates all over her face is basically protected under this law. Nothing about this scene is “extreme.”
If porn is meant to be a guide to sexual practices, then these videos are shoving body negativity and sexism down our throats in a way that the damage, while not physical, would be far beyond transient and trifling. The sites that focus on the pleasure of people of all genders, on discovering who you are and loving it, on not being ashamed of your sexuality even if you’ve been taught that it’s wrong by society are the ones that are being targeted by these restrictions.
Spanking porn is actually a very positive thing. It’s primarily made by a tight knit group of people who keep each other safe and who are passionate enough about sharing and celebrating their kink that they’re willing to dedicate their lives to it. The spanking community (both online and at parties) allows us to interact with performers and know that they truly enjoy what they do. You’re currently sitting wherever you are reading my blog about how I love what I do and how it fills my life with happiness and satisfaction in a way that no other profession could for me.
While there are certainly models who aren’t interested in spanking and just do a few shoots here and there for the money, they’re looked after, too, and the play is scaled to their tolerances. Limits are discussed. Safewords are in place. The play which is presented in spanking shoots is actually very safe: realistically, trying to replicate what you see in a film is likely not actually going to hurt someone because the majority of the Tops in spanking films are very skilled and watching them carefully can actually teach good technique. Of course we roleplay non-consensual scenarios, but I feel that this is the part which is inherently understood by the viewer. And if it isn’t, should we just be responsible for providing more context building materials outside of the actual scene instead of having the entire thing banned?
I’m not saying that the spanking industry is perfect. I have had bad experiences (one notable one) and so have other models that I know. But in general, it’s a healthy, positive community, and with the current louder voices in the scene emphasizing acceptance, safe play, negotiation, consent et cetera, it could only get even better. Unless, of course, you ban the entire thing.
I think it’s telling that when I get into arguments with people online in which I try to defend my experience as a spanking model as having been positive and explain that producing and participating in porn can be a really great experience for everyone involved, the response that I usually get is that it’s so nice for me that in my niche things are in such good shape, but that “real” porn is full of consent violations and ignored limits (I have absolutely no experience with mainstream B/G porn and I’m not agreeing with or supporting this statement, just repeating what was said to me on the internet). It’s funny that what I do isn’t even considered “real” porn by many, yet to the British government, it’s not just real, it’s “extreme.”
So, what’s the state of affairs for the UK based spanking producers? They’re faced with the calling to either relocate their studios, close up shop or fight back and do whatever they can. As far as I have been able to tell, none of the British spanking sites are going to stop production.
Paul told me about this law a couple of weeks ago, and was obviously extremely distressed about it. He asked me if I would be willing to take over legal ownership of Northern Spanking, making it a US based website instead of a UK one. In order to do this, Paul had to, on a legal level, give me every aspect of his company. Technically, I own it, and he now doesn’t have any source of income: that’s all, on paper, mine. Since, despite what you may have heard, I’m not a terrible person, I’m not going to really let this change anything. Everything about Northern will remain the same, until the site’s new design which has been in process for a while now is launched, that is. (I’m not going to run in and put stickers on everything.)
The process of transferring ownership to me was complicated, tedious, stressful and expensive, but it means that Northern is no longer at risk and that, most importantly, no one is going to arrest Paul. Doing this made me sad, though. It was bitter that Paul can’t own the thing that he has spent the better portion of my lifetime nurturing, and which he dedicates so much time, love, energy to. I know that he’s angry at the government for taking that away from him, and rightfully so. I wish I could be with him right now to offer him some comfort.
I learned that John Osborne who runs Triple A Spanking has done something similar: he announced on his blog that transferred ownership of his site to his US based partner, Sarah Gregory in what I can only assume is a similar arrangement. Not everyone has the privilege of having a trusted loved one in another country to whom they can transfer ownership of their site, however. When I was first asked for my thoughts on this on tumblr, a commenter asked why producers don’t just move to another country.
Moving yourself to another country is incredibly difficult. It means uprooting your entire life, putting a huge distance between you and your loved ones, leaving your home, selling or getting rid of most of your possessions because they’re too expensive and difficult to ship, selling your car or paying expensive fees to ship it, rehoming your pets or putting them through quarantine, going through a complicated legal process to get residency which is never easy and in fact can severely limit who can immigrate where and, if you’re leaving England, potentially giving up your right to free Health Care. I know all this because this is what Paul is going through right now.
When I first responded to that inquiry, I said that I didn’t think anyone would do that. It bothered me that people so callously threw this idea around online like it was the simplest thing in the world. “What? The law is infringing on your freedom and making it illegal for you to continue to earn your living? Just leave your entire life behind and start living somewhere else!” Moving to another country is a serious commitment, and I, wishfully, didn’t think that this was a situation so dire that it would cause people to have to do that.
I was not correct, as Sarah Bright of Spanking Sarah and English Spankers (among other sites) announced that she and her partner, Mr. Stern will be relocating their family to Spain to avoid persecution, a piece of news that solidified the seriousness of this situation for me. I simultaneously think it isn’t fair for people to suggest that producers should simply move away and feel that it’s perfectly understandable to want to live your life, especially a family life (as Sarah describes in her post) away from this stressful situation.
Pandora Blake has declared that she’s staying put, and she’s staying very on top of things, giving us information on how to file a complaint against the ATVOD and encouraging people to join her at a protest against the policies next week. Dreams of Spanking will continue to operate in the UK.
Nimue Allen of Nimue’s World has posted about the issue as well, and, as far as I can tell, intends to stand her ground and continue to operate her site from England. Hywel Phillips of Restrained Elegance, explained in a blog post that his studios are already legally based in the US and that he isn’t sure how the censorship will affect him, but that he doesn’t want to have to leave his home country. I don’t know what several other producers plan to do or not do, but it’s vital that all of them have our support.
What can you do?
If you live in the UK you can write to your MP protesting the censorship.
No matter where you live, you can sign this petition.
If you live in the UK you can also sign this one, and, most importantly, the official petition.
Donate to Backlash UK, a sexual liberties lobby group which has set up a legal fund to assist producers if they are targeted, and who is campaigning against the policy.
If you’re local to London or able to travel there, attend a protest outside of Parliament.
Consider getting a month’s membership to one of the sites affected by the censorship.
If you live in the UK, it is NOT illegal for you to join spanking sites, purchase spanking content or posses this content. As a consumer, you are not at risk: only producers are.
I don’t even feel up to leaving the sign-off heart on this post. There’s nothing that I heart about this.
On Thursday, I woke up as late as I could get away with, since I had fallen asleep around six thirty or something in the morning. I wasn’t thrilled to be going into a party on that little sleep, but it was sort of inevitable and there was nothing I could do about it.
The day started out with Paul and I filming with Sarah Gregory for Northern Spanking— you can read his notes on the shoot here. Paul started working out ideas for scenarios weeks ago, and it was kind of fascinating to see his process. Because we were filming in the hotel, Paul created a set of scenarios which made sense for us to be in such a setting instead of trying to pretend that we were somewhere else and this lead to some rather creative thinking on his part. I was a little nervous about filming because it was my first time ever being on camera for some of the scenes and it was my first time actually filming with Sarah! We’ve known each other for a while, and we roomed together and I shot a scene for her site while we were at TASSP, so we were comfortable around each other, but we had never actually done any films together until this day.Filming with Sarah went quickly and smoothly, since she (obviously!) knows what she’s doing. Two of the scenes we shot included her bottoming, which she only does rarely these days, so that was kind of special. The first scene involved Paul playing a seedy private detective and Sarah being a cheating wife who he catches at her meeting place. This was the first time that I got to watch Paul spanking another girl for a film in real life: every time we’d filmed together previously, I was the only one getting spanked. I enjoyed getting to watch this scene, even if through the camera, especially because Paul’s character was a bit wicked and I’ve always enjoyed those sorts of scenes. 😀 Sarah looked great, too, in her sexy lingerie (but then again, she always looks great!)
The second scene involved me getting spanked by Sarah and is the first film that the two of us have done together. We’d played during group roleplay events before, but never on camera. Sarah is a great top and is easy to roleplay with, and the spanking that she gave me was delightful. Additionally, this was the first time in my entire life that I wore heels with jeans, and I think I like the look! I’d never done it before because I avoided heels except for the most specialist of occasions since I used to have height related self esteem issues, but those don’t bother me anymore so I’ve been enjoying experiments like this. 😀 In the film, I play a sneaky, snarky writer who gets caught in a hotel I’ve written poor reviews of many times by an irate manager, played by Sarah. I consider scenes where I’m unabashedly not repentant for me behavior a challenging area for me, but I think I’m getting better at it. When I need clever snark, I ask myself what Erica Scott would say. When I need to be bratty and awful, I borrow a page from The Bad Alex’s daily life. I think that the film ended up being great: funny and full of delightful girl/girl spanking action. ^_^
Scene number the third was between Sarah and Paul again, with Sarah playing a second-rate erotic author and Paul playing her irate publisher. This scene ended up being particularly funny, and I had to keep my composure behind the camera and not giggle at their antics (which I did manage to do, thankfully!) Sarah looks lovely in jeans, I have to say. 😛
The final scene was between Paul and I, and it was actually the first time that we’d played on camera since the end of March, so that was pretty exciting. This was our original type of interaction, and it was nice to return to it, now bringing the massive chemistry that comes when two people know each other as intimately as we now do. It was also the first time that we did a film in which we played a couple since we actually became one, so that was a bit sweet. Paul was vague about the description of this film’s content in his post so I suppose that I had better be, too, but it’s a cute story with a delightful caning in it which was hard enough that when it was finished, Sarah marveled at my composure.
I helped pick out some of the images that Paul put up on the forum when he wrote about this shoot, and this was one of the ones that I chose. I like it for the normal reasons: I look scared and vulnerable, Paul looks determined and threatening et cetera, but also because of his shadow on the curtain. I like imagining that we’re on a ground floor and a passerby might see this silhouette from outside and perhaps stop to watch the shadow-puppet version of my thrashing. How deliciously voyeuristic!
When we had finished shooting, I had to run off pretty much right away because I had an appointment in Detention! Joe (Drlectr) and Mama Blue were running a series of short “Principal’s office” detention scenarios and I was scheduled for shortly after the filming finished. Joe and I have played hundreds of times, and he’s one of the people with whom I’ve played the most intimately and emotionally intensely, but we’ve never really done any roleplay scenarios. I know that he’s fond of school style paddling scenes, and I love any kind of roleplay which is highly formalized, so I figured the scene was going to be good. I take great delight in the embarrassment of having someone else watching me be punished, like Vice Principal Blue!
I was already in my uniform so I ran up to Joe and Ten’s room to wait outside the doorway. They were talking to someone in the room, so I had to wait outside.
Waiting in this hallway, knowing that in a minute, I was about to be paddled and that it would be quite severe was something directly from my fantasy life. Everyone on the floor was at the Crimson Moon party, which meant that everyone who passed and saw me stood outside Joe’s room in my uniform knew that I was waiting for my detention. This also meant that they weren’t judging me, but that didn’t remove the squirmy feeling in my tummy every time someone walked by. Finally, Joe, now Principal Lectr, opened the door and called me in.
A lot of my roleplay characters are helpless and innocent, but that was certainly not the case today. The scene that Joe and I had written involved me being in trouble for attempting to seduce my male teachers, and I was full of confidence and eroticism, flirting with Principal Lectr even as he lectured me on my wicked ways. “You seem to think this is alright!” Vice Principal Blue said in dismay. “You’re going to have to start seeing the school counselor once a week!”
“Will it be a male counselor?” I asked with a flirtatious grin. The authority figures had had enough of me, so I was bent over the desk for eight paddle swats, which were delivered firmly and on the bare. The paddling wasn’t much of a sanction for me, though, and I kept up my act, hoping for a little extra attention. I got just that, in the form of a hard, OTK spanking after the paddling. When the scene was over, Mama Blue took off and Joe and I got to enjoy some time together. Joe is wonderful. I’m so lucky to have him in my life.
After this, Joe walked me back to my room and we told Paul about our roleplay. Then Paul and I took a little time to regroup before heading down for dinner. We hadn’t had much lunch, so we mostly used this as a time to socialize and see who was at the party already before heading out to get a bite and some drinks nearby. During dinner, Naughty Freckles asked me if I’d be willing to be a rope-bunny for the “Fit to be Tied and Spanked” demo later that night, which I gladly accepted. Bondage can be a lot of fun, and I do get a little thrill out of performing in front of a group. Between dinner and the demo, Paul and I ran to the store (without me ever bothering to change out of my school uniform!) and then got back in time to be able to socialize a bit before I needed to start. Paul finally got to meet LLB, who is very dear to my heart, and a handful of my other friends.
Then it was time for the demo! Kinkmedic, from 12:11 Kink taught some basic ties and showed how they can be used for spanking. This included tying me up, including in a bent over position where he then balanced a cup of Mountain Dew on my back while I tried very hard to stay still. Afterwards, they passed out rope and people practiced the ties and I allowed people to practice on me, too. It was a lot of fun, and the ties were effective, easy and comfortable. “A+ would be tied up by again!”rating!
After the demo, we snuck out and ate dinner, then ran into about 15 of my favorite people who were entering the restaurant as we were leaving. We headed upstairs, where I probably got changed again and we went to Joe and Ten’s suite. There were only a few people hanging out in there, since most everyone else had gone to dinner, but I had a good time talking to everyone, including the person behind Spanking Resource (I don’t know if he uses a particular name online or not!) and a few others.
At one point I did something out of line and needed to be spanked (gasp!) so Paul selected one of Big Bubba’s Bible Belts and applied it to me. Big Bubba is a friend of mine who does leatherworking, and his belts with “Bible” stamped on them are a perennial favorite. It started out as just a pun, but the belts are fairly lightweight, delightfully pliable and capable of being used across intensities. This instance of the implement belongs to Joe, and it’s obvious that he’s spanked about 108 girls with it because it was delightfully well broken in and clearly an implement “of joy!” It was stingy in a light and delicious way… dare I say it was even “sensual.” I didn’t want the spanking to stop, ever! I made Paul promise that we’d buy one for ourselves at the vendor’s fair.
The next thing that I wrote in my notes is “Bad Alex is Bad.” I have no idea what particular incident this refers to, because that’s kind of like writing notes on a day out hiking and saying “The sky is blue.” A while before the party, Bad Alex and I were arguing back and forth and I called her some kind of awful insult, as we tend to do to each other. Instead of just responding with one of her signature, creative insults (“your breath smells like Bigfoot’s dick”) Bad Alex decided to write a long and carefully worded email to Paul, explaining how I had wronged her and how she wanted to keep my “good girl status intact” by telling on me “for my own good.” I’m sure she said “I’m just a little girl” somewhere in there, too. Of course I ended up getting caned, because there’s no fairness anywhere in the Universe when Bad Alex is involved (remember, I once got 14 strokes of the cane because she punched me in the knee!)
At CCM, she continued this masquerade of being a good girl who is unfairly accused by me by being sweet and polite whenever Paul was around and then turning around and insulting or slapping me when he wasn’t looking. He always seemed to be looking when I retaliated, though, and I was soon jumping up and down at the unfairness of it all. I had high hopes of seeing Alex properly punished sometime this weekend, though, and my best bet was at Spanking Court on Saturday night. Bad Alex claimed she had a foolproof defense, but I wasn’t so sure. As soon as the box was out in the main room, I filed a class-action case against her as “The Good Alex representing the people of CCM vs. Bad Alex for harassment.”
This seems like a good stopping point for this post. I suspect that CCM will be broken up into about 5 or 6 posts total, since I took notes and everything. Please stay tuned! ♥
After having finished the two very exciting shoots that I wrote about in my last couple of posts, I spent a few more days with Pandora. The time that we spent just hanging out was always fun and enjoyable. We did sessions and had fun together. A huge portion of this involved me picking up her cat and not putting her down when she wanted me to. 😛 Eventually, though, Pandora needed to get back to the rest of her life, and I was meant to go visit S_F at this point. Unfortunately, his situation horrible personal situation had not improved, and he was unable to come get me or host me at his house. I actually didn’t end up seeing him at all, the entire time I was in England. Instead, Paul Kennedy and Lucy McLean were kind enough to agree to host me for the rest of the time that I was there. This ended up being basically the best thing ever.
Paul came to pick me up from Pandora’s, and we all had some tea and cake (although just regular cake, not Cake of Ultimate Joy™) before I had to say goodbye to her. I knew I wasn’t going to see her until BBW, which was about a month away, and this was sad for me, because I knew I was going to miss her. I hugged her a lot, and I harassed her cat as much as I could before I had to leave. As disappointing as it was to have to leave Pandora, I was excited that I was going to get to spend more time with Paul. I had found myself thinking about him pretty consistently since I left his house, and I was happy that I’d be seeing more of him.
When we returned to his house, I got to see his wife, Lucy, who I had only briefly met at Shadowlane last year. Lucy wasn’t feeling well that night, but being the horrible influence on my innocent friends that I am, I somehow managed to keep us up until the early morning chatting. Lucy is one of the coolest people to talk to ever, because she knows about an infinite number of things that I don’t know about, mostly lady things, and because she never makes me feel stupid or annoying when I have to ask a hundred and fifty questions about something. Additionally, she’s extremely kind, and I knew as soon as we finally got to sit down and socialize a bit that I really, really liked her and enjoyed being around her.
It’s hard for me to pinpoint the details of the time that I spent at their house and put it all in order. As before, I felt very relaxed and at ease while there, and the environment made me feel really free to be myself. Paul and I got to scene together pretty regularly, as well as just spending normal time together, and I found myself feeling very affectionate towards him– I think I spent the majority of the free time that I had while I was at their house cuddled up to him on the sofa. While it didn’t feel much of anything like the other D/s relationships that I’ve had, at one point or another I realized that I felt very submissive towards him, in a way that made me feel tremendously safe. Some kind of buffer of safety and comfort built up around me as we spent time together, and even though we’re away from each other now, it’s never gone away. In certain ways I felt tremendously shy about it, but I was slowly realizing that this feeling was greater than just affection, or caring or any other words that I might use to describe it aside from love (spoiler alert, we’re in a relationship now). But I didn’t entirely come to this conclusion until after I had returned home. At the moment, it was just a very happy time, in a place and with people that made me feel very contented.
One day near the beginning of this particular chapter of my never-ending adventure, Paul took me into London for what was kind of originally meant to be a variety of tourism events including hanging out at Camden Lock and shopping, but which turned into exclusively that, because I was so enthralled by it. It was cold and kind of constantly rainy, but I just loved walking around and checking out everything. If you don’t know, it’s an area that’s full of kind of alternative stores and vendors and it’s by the waterfront. I obtained several adorable things here, including a couple of excessively cute bunny related things and my very own prefect badge, which is something I’ve always wanted. In a vintage store, I found and got to try on some actual school uniform blazers (the fancy type) but none of them actually fit me, largely because they were all designed for boys of various ages. It was still super cool to wear, and I hope that some day I actually can find a real, legitimate one that fits me properly.
|I have this bunny shirt now. Also, this photo was taken at 13:37. Hawt.|
Shortly after this, a series of events that I now refer to as The Camden Pancake Incident took place. During this incident, Paul got me a pancake from a street vendor. This was basically a sweet crepe, and, for Angelinos, it was served sort of similarly to the ones that I used to get at Four Leaf: folded up on itself in a paper cone. I got it nutella, strawberries and whipped cream, which was basically the best combination of things I could think of, and it was hot when it was handed to me, which pleased me greatly due to my constant state of being kind of cold in England. “Don’t make a mess,” Paul warned me as I started to eat it, and I kind of responded with “Yeah, of course, obviously” or something.
I then proceeded to make a bigger mess than I have ever made in my entire adult life.
Because the pancake was hot, all the nutella and whipped cream melted together into some sort of drippy, creamy, chocolatey goo that got everywhere. It got all over my coat. It got all over my dress. It got all over my socks and shoes. It dripped in a trail behind me. It got into my hair. I probably got it on Paul. It was just impressively messy. I tried to clean as much of it up with napkins as possible, but that had limited success. I was just a sticky mess for the rest of the day. Later, when we got back to the house and I changed to go to bed, I discovered that I had somehow gotten it on my skin under my dress and on my underwear, which doesn’t even seem to follow the laws of physics to me.
Sigh. I’m an adult, I promise.
That evening, we went to a bar where I got to meet Leia-Ann Woods for the first time. She was really peppy and very entertaining to talk to, and I was excited that we’d be getting to see each other again at Boardwalk Badness Weekend the next month. On every occasion that we’ve been together, I’ve failed to take a photo. F – -.
That evening ended in a lovely way, as Paul and I went to dinner, and then took the train back to his town (on which I was very sleepy). The adventure finished with taking a midnight ferry ride, which was theoretically really enticing to me, but ended up being super cold. Fortunately, Paul took me upstairs to a giant heat vent, which I stood under and filled my happiness meter.
That weekend, we filmed for Northern Spanking. I often go thru and give a long play-by-play which describes the scenes that were filmed during a shoot, but this particular one is under-wraps. I’ll just say the following things:
* Besides me and Paul, the films involves Stephen Lewis, Michael Stamp and Zoe Page. There’s something incredibly, indulgently enjoyable about having four tops all to oneself.
* At one point, I wore this fancy outfit, courtesy of Lucy, who besides being amazing herself has all the most amazing stuff to wear ever:
* While we were planning out one of the scenes, Paul sat in this tiny chair, and I think this is the most endearing photo ever.
* It became obvious to everyone that I don’t really know my left from my right particularly well and that I’m horrible at singing.
* Some parts of this were ridiculous.
The final adventure that I shall detail in this post involves Primark. I don’t think most people in the US know what Primark is, unless they’ve been around me recently and have asked me where I bought something I was wearing. Primark is a stylish (“fashion forward” I think is the term) but inexpensive store in England. A lot of the styles that they had were very “me.” They had an enormous selection of underwear and pajamas.
I bought all the things.
So. Many. Things.
I’m almost ashamed to post a photo, because I feel like it makes me look a little awful, but I’m going to anyway.
|This was only the first day. I went back. -_-|
Lucy and Zoe took me, and they were the best people I’ve ever shopped with. They were never annoyed at me for spending so much time, and they helped me try things on, and they told me when things did or didn’t look good on me, they carried stuff around, they took stuff into the dressing room for me… it was just amazing. Lucy fitted me for bras and I finally got some that looked appropriate on me AND are comfortable. The second trip involved me learning what kind of jeans actually don’t make me look stupid, and I’ve actually taken to wearing them fairly regularly (one of those developments in my personality that some people continue to be flabbergasted by). After the shopping adventure, I tried on literally everything in a fashion show, including every single pair of panties that I bought, which I think numbered at least 50. This whole “Alex bought all the things” event lead to me being kind of annoying to my friends at home when they want to know where I got something, because basically all the clothes I wear now come from this exhibition. This also lead to me promising not to shop for two months after coming back from England, which lead to me consistently getting myself a variety of forms of trouble, but most of that is another story.
There will only be one more post about England after this, and then I will post rather briefly about BBW, and then I have a few more adventures to describe before I am all caught up. PROGRESS! ♥