On Saturday, I went shopping with my Bee Eff Eff, Maddycake. I went to a bikini-bar with some friends on Friday night, so I had some leftover singles in my wallet because I was not particularly zealous with the tipping. I’ve been budgeting pretty carefully with the move coming up, but it was essentially leftover morale money, so, when we saw this at Sur La Table I had to get it:
I asked Maddycake what she thought this was supposed to be for and her response was “beating Alex.” Clearly. I have to admit, now that I’ve gotten it home and messed around with it a bit, this thing kind of terrifies the hell out of me. I’ve had big spoons before, but they’ve always had a very large spanking surface. This one is much smaller, and therefore much more concentrated. Then there’s the fact that the material kind of feels like Warren. -_-
At Sur La Table, they had a small Christmas tree full of kitchen related ornaments for the holidays, so I picked up the first decoration for Malignus and me as a family:
It’s a tiny wooden spoon! It’s so perfect for us. Its red handle echos that bitch, Jenny (Warren’s little sister, who used to be the bane of my existence before Warren came around and was about 8 times worse.) Awwww.
Finally, I went into The Body Shop to get some Body Butter (for the purpose of lathering up my butt to prevent dry skin when I’m getting spanked a lot) and discovered that the entire store was buy two, get two free. So, when faced with two free items I didn’t really need (because I did want to get two Body Butters to begin with. I use the Vitamin E one when I need to grow new skin and the Extra Dry Skin one otherwise) I got myself bath soap and…
See how unsure my face is? That is me being very fearful and not entirely positive what I got myself into. This is a mean thing, for sure. I also somehow managed to acquire seven new implements in the span of a couple of days, while only spending eight dollars on them. I need to stop having such good luck with this stuff. It’s going to eventually lead to my untimely demise. I’m putting a ban on buying anything new at all before I leave, unless it’s a packing supply or going to be consumed, since I have to store so much stuff to begin with. Today was the last shopping trip until I’m in LA as a visitor! :/
My Saturday finished up with a surprise visit from J. I’ll hopefully get to see him one more time before I leave, but we treated today like it would be the last time, just in case. It was bittersweet. He gave me a nice, snuggly hand-spanking that left me feeling like I was glowing.
Whew! That’s a lot of stuff! Hope everyone else had a good weekend!
You know what the internet doesn’t have enough of on it yet? Pictures of my butt! I’m here to fight against this huge social problem, one post at a time!
Here, I’m getting handcuffed by the lovely Dana Kane:
This one is my favorite: The Spanking Court Disciplinarian (The Villain) just broke a full-size paddle on my poor butt!
And finally, here I am with the broken pieces in front of the height chart. This photo points out something very important: I shrank! I used to be a full 5’8″ when barefoot without even having to posture up or anything.
If I look a little spacey in this photo, it’s because I just had two sets of 100 strokes (per set) with a leather strap, followed by 200 strokes with a (well, really two, because the first one is in pieces) wooden paddle.
I’ll post a link to the videos once they are uploaded 🙂 I hope everyone enjoys their weekend!
I missed a couple of posts already! I was supposed to update on Saturday, but I was off shooting with Lily Starr Spanking, so I didn’t get one up that day. Then Tuesday brought a visit from a favorite play partner and by the time I was settling in for the evening, I entirely forgot my self-created responsibilities. Tisk, tisk! Certainly, things will be easier once I get more used to my posting schedule (and get extra content scheduled in advance :P). A bit over a week ago, I did my first spanking modeling shoot with Assume The Position Studios. I was extremely excited about it, and a little nervous, since I wasn’t sure what effect the camera would have on the atmosphere of the scene. I met Photodave at a coffee shop near the studio where we’d be shooting where I consumed a coke and a strawberry cupcake (I hadn’t eaten anything yet that day, and I find that I respond better to spankings when I have sugar in my system. Or maybe it’s just a positive emotional connection. Either way, it made me happy!) We walked over to the studio after chatting a bit and going over paperwork and then started going through my wardrobe. We hadn’t created any scenes in advance: it hadn’t really occurred to me that I should have been thinking about that. We ended up selecting a pair of panties and some knee socks for a few cute, glamourous, pre-spanking photos.
After that, I changed into a school girl dress and we got ready to do the scene. It’s fortunate for me that the appropriate way for me to be acting for the character I was meant to portray was nervous and unsure: since it was my first video, it took me a little bit to get “warmed up,” especially since a lot of the ways that I need to behave for a spanking video are different than the way that I’d act if I was just playing for my own purposes. The major thing is hiding my enthusiasm–– there have only been a few times in my life when I *haven’t* wanted a spanking, so playing a reluctant character requires quite a bit of acting on my part. What did not require acting, though, were my cries and squeals: the scene begins with me OTK (my favorite place to be!) and right away, the spanking was very firm and it certainly hurt. I don’t want to give away all the details (since I would, ideally, like you to buy the videos :P) but we moved through a considerable amount of implements: a hairbrush which met it’s untimely demise on my bottom, many beautiful, painful paddles from Kitty’s Exotic Paddles, the belt, a cane, a large and intimidating looking strap and finally a heavy wooden “ruler” that was very, very mean! During the final segment of the video I reached the point of sobbing: this is not particularly uncommon for me in any intense spanking situation with a “serious” atmosphere (even though it was a roleplay). My tears are never a sign of true distress, and I love sharing them. I was extremely excited that two photos (one posted by Dave and one by me) from this scene made Kinky and Popular on fetlife.
I was especially pleased that the photo depicting my tears did: the fact that I cry frequently is still an area where I expect (or fear) that I will receive judgement, so it was really positive for me to be able to share that and get such a good response. I look forward to shooting with Assume The Position Studios again in the future: I felt extremely at-ease when on set, and the spanking was blissfully painful. It left me sore for several days, especially on my sit-spot. Even though the spanking didn’t carry any emotional significance for me (besides the pleasure of being my first spanking modeling shoot) I was left in a relaxed and cheerful mood for a while. It seems that while I didn’t have a *bad* attitude before, it was adjusted to be even more pleasant by participating in my favorite activity.
I started regular, vanilla modeling when I was in my junior year of college. It began with a gig that a lot of people wouldn’t have gone for, but which I totally adored: being photographed walking around Manhattan topless. For $25.00/hour. In February. In between shots, I put my coat back on, so I didn’t die of hypothermia, and New York State has a law saying that anywhere that a man can appear topless, a woman can as well, so I didn’t get arrested, either. What I did get were pretty cool photos, bragging rights and a whopping $75.00. For someone making minimum wage by shelving books in the school library, that was a big influx of cash. I started modeling whenever I could and worked my way up the ladder: I got better at it, worked with better photographers and developed a bit of a name for myself.
|The oldest surviving photo of me as a model. Hot, right?|
I won’t say it never occurred to me to do spanking modeling: it did, from the very start of my vanilla modeling work. The idea was, however, incredibly unappealing. I wasn’t part of the community yet in any real way: I was in a disciplinary spanking relationship with Serious_Face, and I had told my five closest friends about either my activities or my interest therein. On campus, it was the general opinion that I was probably kinky, but to me, saying something so general as that was far less personal than saying that I was into spanking. I still had trouble saying or hearing the word aloud sometimes. No photos existed of my bottom after a spanking, and it seemed like the most logical thing to keep it this way.
|This is the first spanking related photo of me ever taken. It’s from about five months ago, after a spanking given to me by my play partner, J.|
Fast forward to the present day: an awful lot has changed. My attitude towards spanking has become entirely different. Instead of feeling embarrassed or ashamed to be a spanko, even in likeminded company, I celebrate it whenever possible in a variety of ways. I’m proud of my bruises and my tears. What’s most important, perhaps, is that I feel that I *get* something out of sharing my experiences with other spankos. Posting spanking related photos and getting a positive response is a wonderful reaffirmation for me: this is the very core of who I am. This is something I’ve struggled with for nearly my entire life. People get it. They don’t judge me. They think I’m awesome for what I do.
When I had some difficulties in the vanilla modeling world, I started to think about spanking modeling as an option for the first time. I’d gotten nearly obsessed with showing off post-spanking photos and telling stories of awesome scenes to my friends. I was flashing likeminded strangers my bruises at munches. I felt good about every aspect of my spanko life, and I wanted to share it wherever it was appropriate. Plus, I needed money. Money always helps.
So, I scheduled my first three shoots: I shot with Assume The Position Studios on Monday, will be shooting with Lily Starr Spanking this weekend and will be shooting with a well known pay-site in about two weeks time (I’m not sure if I’m allowed to publicly announce where before the shoot, so I chose to err on the side of caution). A couple other production companies have contacted me about shooting with them, too, and I’m trying to hammer out details there.
I hate to make a shameless plug, but if you’re looking for lovely models who can take one hell of a spanking, you know how to get ahold of me. 😉
To everyone else, I hope you look forward to seeing more content from me in the future, because there’ll be plenty!