capsaicin

It started on New Year’s Eve.

When we were discussing what would make for a good New Year’s, I had, of course, mentioned a spanking to ring in the year. We spent the evening at home together, so as midnight approached, Malignus instructed me to find something that I wanted to be spanked with. Selecting one’s own implement is an ordeal. There’s a certain balance that has to be struck. I’m only ever asked to select implements for lighthearted spankings, so I don’t want to select something which will be excessive for that atmosphere and make me miserable. At the same time, I’m less emotionally vulnerable in such a situation, so I don’t feel pain as severely as I would during other types of spankings so I don’t want to select something which isn’t going to leave me feeling like I was properly spanked. I spent probably too long a time literally weighing my options (picking them up in my hand to feel the heft and weight of them, giving myself test swats et cetera) and finally made my choice. I selected “Ben,” a pretty hefty wooden spoon, since I was feeling rather daring. Once this selection had been made, I brought it to Malignus and he invited me to lie over his lap while we watched Firefly. In case you don’t know, this is my favorite show of all time. I derive the surname of my scene identity from the main character: Malcolm Reynolds.

I’m seriously in love. Don’t judge.

I haven’t spent a lot of time lying bare bottomed over someone’s lap when a spanking was not in progress. It was basically the coziest and most relaxing thing I’d ever felt. I knew entirely that I belonged there and that everything was right with the world. Then, right before Midnight, Malignus announced that he was going to hit me 67 times. I found this confusing, considering the fact that Malignus is mildly OCD and really hates prime and odd numbers and that it seemed like an entirely arbitrary number. Soon, though, our alarms beeped for midnight and Malignus began my spanking. It was fairly hard, and I had selected a pretty serious implement, so I squirmed and wailed. He spanked me at an even tempo, but building in intensity. Still, 67 swats isn’t all that many for an OTK style spanking, so it ended at a point where I was gasping for breath and felt very much like I had been soundly spanked but before it reached a point where things had become truly overwhelming. Afterwards, we hugged and exchanged “Happy New Years!” and then went back to the episode.

After a little bit, I asked him why he had selected that number. He told me to figure it out on my own. This lead to me doing a lot of math on the calculator on my phone. The closest thing that I came up with was the fact that 2013 divided by 30 was ~67. I guessed that this was because 30 is the age that Malignus recently turned. He informed me that while my math was correct, the reason behind it was not. He then told me that it was his intention to spank me in this manner every day for the next thirty days, so that by the end of the month (with a little wiggle room) I’d receive 2013 spanks. This idea made me seriously grin, as does any plan that involves me getting lots and lots of spanking.

We worked on the schedule of having a nightly, succinct spanking for the first week or so of the month and then our vanilla lives took over and declared that this was not to be the case. Malignus’ work schedule got in the way of things for a few days, and then I left for my Denver excursion, which I returned from with a serious case of the flu which Malignus then contracted from me, following which he pulled a muscle in his spanking arm… you get the point. Things just kept happening that kept us from working on our celebratory plan.

Instead, Malignus decided that we’d get caught up in the form of clusters. He started giving me sets of 67 swats with one implement before moving on to the next one and the next one. I actually preferred this a bit, since these spankings ended up pushing me further and therefore being more gratifying for me.

On Monday of this week, we still had quite a few sets of 67 to get through and the month was, obviously, coming to a close. The spanking started with “Let’s work on New Years.” I then got into position over a few pillows on the bed as he grabbed a handful of implements from their secret stash (a giant pile under the bed which is kind of flowing out from two toy bags). The spanking started out differently than many spankings do between us: he started using a hairbrush with a very small spanking surface but using it quite hard and at a noteworthily quick pace. It felt like the entire set of 67 swats was delivered in about thirty seconds. Due to the startling nature of this, I did not take this set particularly well. I rolled around a bit, kicked once or twice and cried out “OW,” which always feels a little foolish to me. (Well, duh, ow, Alex! says the voice in my head).

The next two sets were considerably less severe. He used lightweight implements at a fairly manageable pace, and I relaxed into the spanking. The next two implements brought me to the peak of where this particular spanking would hurt: he used this silly joke paddle that I got at Bear Country USA. It’s basically made of plywood and reads “Bald Man’s Hairbrush.” I bought it mostly out of amazement that they still sell souvenir paddles somewhere in the world! I had never actually been spanked with it before. (Un)fortunately, Malignus is a Wizard when it comes to spanking, and he managed to get it to be the most intolerably stingy thing ever. I felt positively lit on fire when the set ended. Immediately after, he switched to my nemesis: our small lexan paddle. He didn’t use it with full force, but it still hurt like nobody’s business. Immediately after that, he used a wooden spoon very lightly.

When that was over, he moved on to use a number of other implements which I didn’t really keep track of, but I noticed an unusual pattern: none of them hurt. At all. It felt like I was getting spanked, but without any of the pain. At one point, I stopped to point this out and Malignus explained that it had to do with my endorphins and the manner in which the first set had made my skin swell and the way that the light set had offset the painful part. That’s not very clear, because it was being explained to me while I was in endorphin land.

What eventually happened, though, was that I was able to take spanking after spanking without blinking an eye. The most interesting part was when he started caning me. He gave me 67 strokes with a rattan cane that usually makes me cry with six. I didn’t feel any of the surface pain whatsoever. I just felt the lingering ache that accompanies cane strokes, and found that without the buzzing, itching (as Pandora Blake described it) sting, it was postively pleasant. I remarked that none of this was hurting, and Malignus sort of laughed. “The beauty of this,” he said, “is that it will later.” He then rubbed capsaicin on my very warm bottom, just to be sure, I suppose.

By the time we finished for the day, I had been spanked with all these things:


My butt was in the following condition:

For most of the day, all I really felt when I sat down was the capsaicin. It was full of it’s usually burning, but because I still had a residual endorphin high, I felt pretty okay with this. Then, around eight PM, I got up, did a few things and sat back down on my computer to discover that I felt like I had been very severely spanked. It was like magic. All day, the spanking had been hiding under my endorphines and swelling and suddenly it appeared.
I guess there are still new experiences for me in Spankingland. 🙂                                                                                                                              

On a regular basis, I look at what search terms get me the most traffic. I’m not obsessed with search engine optimization or anything, but I do like to know what people are looking for when they come here. From time to time, though, I sort through the less popular search terms. I’ll go through the whole list! Some of them are laughably weird. Others are more of what I’d expect. There are quite a few people that reach my blog by typing a question into a search engine. This is a practice that makes me think of my friend and former blogger Sophie, who first discovered the internet spanking world by typing “How do I get a spanking” into a search engine.
I’ve decided that I’m going to go through and directly answer the questions that were posed to me indirectly through the form of my search terms. Sounds like fun to me. 🙂

Q: How do I care for a spanked bottom?
A: I recommend referring to this post for detailed information on the subject. In the immediate short term, I recommend ice, lotion and, if available, gentle butt massage. 🙂

Q: Are spankings really enjoyable?
A: My immediate answer to this would be “fuck yes!” because to me, there’s no question. There are a lot of intricacies to this, though. For example, disciplinary spankings are by no means enjoyable, even though they are important to me and an extremely effective tool in the process of my amelioration and growth. Other spankings are only enjoyable because of the feeling of submission which they conjure up in my heart and the satisfaction of knowing that it pleased my partner to spank me in such a manner. At the end of the day, though, being spanked by someone who loves me makes me feel loved, no matter the situation or atmosphere. There are always going to be spankings that are less enjoyable: the awkward ones when getting to know a play partner, the guy at a party whose style just doesn’t click with you at all, the Top you don’t really know who accidentally crosses some kind of line, et cetera. So, I can’t say that ALL spankings are enjoyable, but as a general rule, yes, spankings are awesome.
THAT SAID, I am speaking from the viewpoint of a true, hardwired spanko. I sometimes try to imagine what it would be like for someone who is not one such to experience a spanking. I would imagine that for someone with other interests in bottoming in the kink community, it could be anything from a nice change of pace to slightly humiliating to downright strange. Those who aren’t already interested in having painful things done to them would probably be extremely shaken. I can’t begin to fathom what it would be like for a vanilla person to experience the kinds of spankings that I do. I’ve talked to a number of Tops who really fetishize the idea of spanking a vanilla girl, but it just seems really, really awful to me (unless, of course, you only gave her a very symbolic spanking).
To finalize my excessively long answer to this, spankings are almost always enjoyable in some form, if you’re a spanko or a kinkster interested in spanking. Whew!

Q: Black nylon cane. Good?
A: I have a black nylon cane. It was a gift to me from SF. It’s one of the harshest implements I own, and it’s pretty scary. Malignus is impressive skilled at caning and he uses it well, but because it’s a very dynamic implement and has enormous flexibility, it’s very difficult to manage. If you’re a Top who is good with canes and looking for something whippy, flexible and capable of delivering a world of hurt, then yes, it’s good. If you’re a bottom, no, it’s not, unless you’re really looking to be sorry, want to be pushed to submit or are a crazy masochist.

Q: Capsaicin cream before or after spanking?
A: As a general rule, when capsaicin has been applied to me, it’s been after a spanking. I have had it applied and then been given additional swats to the area (this was on my inner thigh) and said additional swats felt horrible and made me roll around all over the floor. I suppose it could be used before, in order to make the entire spanking feel like that. Be careful to avoid getting it in eyes, nose et cetera, and not to get it on broken skin. Multiple reports suggest that this is actual torture.
Or, you know, you could be a nice person and not use it all unless you have arthritis and need to warm your joints. That’d be cool, too.

Q: Describe a spanking with an ebony hairbrush.
A: Heather W, in one of our first conversations, described it like this: “…then he spanked me with an ebony hairbrush, which, in case you weren’t aware, is no different than a ROCK.” The material which is closest in effect to an ebony hairbrush, in my opinion, is a small, thick lexan paddle. Ebony is just different than other wood, in a “oh holy mother of god, this hurts!” kind of way. It’s heavy, and hairbrushes have a small spanking surface, so they provide very concentrated pain. They’re also usually a pretty comfortable shape for the spanker to hold, so they can get a good grip and really get you with it. While I really hate being spanked with my ebony hairbrush, it’s something that I do appreciate, because it’s highly effective. It’s a formidable implement. That’s the best phrasing I have for it.

Q: Did God make the butt for spanking?
A: No. In my opinion, God didn’t make the butt for anything, because I entirely reject the belief in deities and in creationism. However, the evolutionary purpose of the human buttocks is not related to spanking, either. Rounded butts on female humans evolved for the purposes of showing off estrogen levels and healthy amounts of fat stores, and to emphasize the size and shape of pelvis and highlight the child-bearing capacity there of. Aside from protecting the tailbone, a fleshy butt seems to have no evolutionary purpose besides to look hot. The cultural evolution of the concept of spanking (both consensual and otherwise) is something that fascinates me, and which I’d like to learn more about in the future, especially as it links to the confusing nature of how, exactly, spankos came to exist.

Q: Do girls like to be spanked in tight jeans?
A: As a general rule, I wouldn’t even say “girls like to be spanked” at all, as I described in an earlier question. I’d personally rather be spanked on my bare bottom than on jeans, because of the increased vulnerability and the fact that this feels warmer and closer to the “ideal spanking” which is imprinted somewhere in my mind as a comfort zone. I do appreciate the protection that jeans can give me, and the nifty fact that when Malignus hits me really hard with a cane over my jeans, it leaves cane stripes on the denim!

Note, I have a crazy wedgie here because my ass was swollen from getting spanked all weekend long and didn’t fit properly in my jeans at the moment this was taken.

 Q: Does it make a spanked bottom feel better to rub it?
A: It won’t cure it, but rubs definitely feel nice on a spanked bottom. The appropriate amount of firmness depends on just how sore the bottom is, but I’ve never been spanked in such a way that at least light rubbing wasn’t soothing.

Q: How do you heal a bruise caused by spanking your wife?
A: Arnica is supposed to reduce bruising, but I don’t use it. I’ve never seen much of a difference whether I used it or not, and it often just dries my skin out. I find that the immediate application of ice followed by massaging and sometimes gentle hand-spanking is the best way to prevent and then get rid of bruising.

Q: Help me become a spanking model?
A: Email me at alexinspankingland@gmail.com if you want more information about this!

Q: How are cane-iac products labeled when shipping?
A: They arrive in a long, cardboard package with no spanking related words anywhere on the package. I can’t remember the name on the return address, but it’s just a kind of unusual sounding name.

Q: How old were you when you got your first spanking from your boyfriend?
A: I, personally, didn’t get a spanking from a boyfriend until I was 24 and Malignus became my boyfriend. I got spanked for the first time when I was 18, but I always had different Tops than boyfriends until Malignus. 🙂

Q: How do I hire a spanking model?
A: This is another more complex and business related question which I will answer if you email me. 🙂

Q: Is capzacin ok to use on a bruise butt for spankings? [sic]A: It is safe to apply capsaicin cream to a butt after a spanking whether or not bruising is present. It won’t decrease bruising, and anyone who is telling you so is just lying to you to try and trick you into accepting the cream. Capsaicin hurts a lot. Some people enjoy this kind of hurting, while others stand in front of a fan for hours while crying. I lean more to the side of “standing in front of a fan crying” but it’s different for everyone. 😀

Q: Should a punishment spanking cause crying and tears?
A: There really isn’t any “should” to spankings in my opinion, aside from the fact that I very firmly believe that only consenting adults should be spanked. In my case, disciplinary spankings pretty much always cause me to cry, and I wouldn’t feel properly chastised if it ended before the point of tears for some reason, and I’d probably ask to be spanked more and harder. It really depends on the person, though. Some people just can’t cry from a spanking.

Q: Should a spanking leave a woman’s bottom bruised?
A: Again, there’s no “should” here. It’s hard to bruise my bottom at this point, although Malignus did succeed at that this weekend. I used to bruise at basically a touch, so it was impossible for me not to be bruised after a spanking. Those physiological differences have to be accounted for, as do social reasons such as people who might see bruises or welts and not accept them and, of course, the preferences of both partners.

Q: What is a spanko?
A: A spanko is a person who fetishizes spanking, or a person involved in BDSM who has a strong preference for spanking related activities. A “hardwired spanko” is a person who has had an interest in or obsession with spanking since their early life and a “spanko purist” is someone who only fetishizes spanking and not other BDSM activities.

Q: Will my first spanking make me cry?
A: This really depends on you. Mine did, although not immediately. About half way into it, I started to cry, and I ended up really sobbing and bawling. This was mostly because it felt so goddamn good to be finally getting a spanking, and I was able to finally let go of all the anxiety that I’d built up around it from the time that I was a child. Some people do not cry the first time they are spanked, but later become comfortable enough with spanking, their Top, themselves et cetera to be able to cry. Some people never cry from a spanking. This is a frustration to some, but others don’t really have any interest in it. It depends on you. 🙂

For whatever reason, I had a lot of fun doing this. Hooray!

Oh, Hai!

Alex

Los Angeles, California, United States

First and foremost, I’m a girl who loves being spanked. It’s at the very center of my being. I’m also a professional spanking model, which means I get to do what I love for my job. I’m twenty six years old, and currently located in Los Angeles when I’m not traveling around on my adventures. My vanilla interests include poetry, film history, academia, Pokemon, indie music, baby animals, baking and cooking, collecting vintage clothes and lots of cuddling.

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