I first met my friend Prux over fetlife nearly a year ago. We got to see each other in person for the first time at BBW. I was practically shocked by what a sweet girl she is: caring, gentle, kind, polite and loving. We got to spend much more time together at July’s Crimson Moon party, and it was then that I knew that we were going to be really good friends. My favorite memory from our interactions during the summer was when we both stayed the night at Joe and Ten’s house following the July party. The Brat Brigade was in full force and ridiculous hijinx were happening all around us. At one point, Bad Alex had gotten me into trouble and I was waiting nervously for the consequences of my actions. Prux came and stood next to me sweetly, holding my hand.

“Do you want to go hide?” she asked. The other girls had been running around the house all evening, hiding in closets and attempting to escape spankings. At this point, I’d never hidden to avoid punishment before in my life (and I’m quite sure Prux hadn’t either), so it seemed like a possibly fun experiment. First, we hid in the closet but it was dark and a bit scary in there, so when no one was looking, we crept up the stairs and out into the front yard. We considered hiding under someone’s car like cats, but decided that was not a wise idea and simply crouched behind it. We stayed there giggling and holding hands for quite a while before we realized that no one was looking for us, so we gave up and wandered back to the basement where everyone was hanging out and confessed what we had done. I took my spanking and then Prux and I cuddled. It would have been fairly anti-climactic if she hadn’t been so damn adorable. That night, we both slept on the same L-shaped sofa, having arranged ourselves so that we wouldn’t poke one and other with our feet.

I got to see Prux a little more at Shadowlane, but that was a particularly busy party for me so I didn’t get to spend as much time with friends as I would have liked. We chatted lots after it, though, and I was really excited to see her during this party. We planned to spend the Wednesday before the party fully started together, and Prux obviously gave careful thought to what we should do together for the most adorable, girly fun possible. Unfortunately, Paul and I didn’t end up getting into Chicago until about 4:30 or something, so we weren’t able to do as much adventuring as we would have liked. I was still one of the most excited girls in the whole world when I saw Prux pull up to meet us at the airport! I couldn’t stop hopping up and down. It was exciting to introduce her and Paul: I love it when the people that I adore finally get to meet each other.

We had to do a couple of errands before going to the hotel, and Prux and I chatted happily while we did them. I had forgotten several important things when packing (as is always the way with me). One of these was a coat– it had been in the 70’s when I left Los Angeles on Wednesday morning, so I left my coat sitting on the chair in my study. I was sorely missing that in Chicago as the wind whipped around. Prux kept giving me cuddles whenever we were outside to keep me warm. 😀 Another thing I had forgotten was a stuffed animal. When we stopped at the grocery store for other supplies, we noticed a shelf full of stuffed toys. I asked Paul if I could get one.

“Of course,” he responded. “You’ll need something to clutch desperately while I’m beating you.” My tummy felt funny when he said this, but Prux helped me pick out an adorable pink panda to be my newest companion. I named her Penelope.

Meet Penelope!

After errands were done, we went to dinner, where Prux and I had nearly excessive cuddles and I managed to get ketchup in my hair. Then we went to the hotel and got checked in. Here, Prux gave me a present: one of the sweetest ones I’ve ever gotten!

It was a “bag of sunshine”: she had assembled a yellow bag full of fun, adorable yellow presents to represent what she said was the “sunshine that I bring into her life.” I couldn’t stop grinning as I unpacked it. Everything was carefully selected, and the whole thing was made more excellent by the fact that yellow is my favorite color!

A puzzle, candy, yellow flowers, cider mix, face masks, nail polish, gummy bears, glitter crayons, a candle, silly string, cute animal containers filled with candy, a giraffe which is also a fan and a card with a sweet note. There were also two rubber ducks, who aren’t shown because they were in the bathtub.

The bag included a puzzle with cute ducks, and Prux and assembled it together (this was the second time that Prux had done it, because she checked to make sure all the pieces were there before giving it to me, which I think is over-the-top sweet!)

Artistic rendering of Prux and I!

After that, I had to take a bath because I was super gross from traveling and had ketchup in my hair. We chatted while I was bathing, and SheldonFT texted to see if he could come say hi to Prux. Soon a small group of spankos had assembled in the living room area of our room while I sat naked in the bath. Paul had gone down to the lobby and got to meet the handful of friends who were in the room when he came back, then he came to talk to me where I was sitting in the bathtub. He instructed me to turn over in the bath so my bottom was up and he gave me my first few swats of the party, scolding me for making such a mess in the restaurant. It started out playful and tender, but then I decided to suddenly drop down so that my bottom was submerged. He wasn’t expecting it, and the next spank made an enormous splash, getting water all over him. The rest of the spanking was much more brisk after that!

Once I had finished in the bath, I came out and got into pajamas and saw Sheldon, Naughty Freckles and LilAngelWings. The group of us chatted until it got a bit late, and then everyone returned to their rooms. I had to say goodnight to Prux, since she wasn’t staying in the hotel that night. I gave her the biggest hug ever and a million thank-you’s for her sweetness. I’m so grateful to have such a wonderful, loving friend. After our hugs time was finished, she shyly and adorably asked Paul if she could hug him, too, which was of course very acceptable indeed!

Once she was gone, though, the evening got slightly more serious. I had done something (personal) I shouldn’t have earlier in the day, and I knew that I was going to be punished for it before going to bed. Paul instructed me to sit on the bed and wait for him while he went downstairs to smoke. I sat on the bed cuddling Penelope and being very still and quiet, my heart racing. I wasn’t sure what exactly was going to happen, but I knew that I needed to be punished for what I had done, and I felt a sense of serenity in the knowledge that my correction was inevitable. After what felt like approximately eight years of waiting, Paul came back and sat down next to me on the bed. He scolded me for my behavior earlier in the day and reminded me why I needed to be punished for it. His voice was gentle the entire time, and his touch sweet. “I thought about it and I’ve decided that I’m not going to cane you for this,” he told me. “It’s the start of a party weekend and I’m partly responsible for what happened this morning. That wouldn’t be fair.” I let out a little sigh, as I had been fairly confident that was what was coming. “Instead I’m going to strap you.” Oh. Well, fuck. “I know you think that’s worse,” he acknowledged.

When other people say “strapping” they could be referring to a spanking given with any of a number of  leather implements, some wide, some narrow, some light and delicious and others bitey and cruel. In my household it only means one thing, though: the tawse. I’m sitting alone in my bedroom writing this, and I still blushed and shuddered to type that word. Mila and I have taken to calling it “the other thing” (with “the first thing” meaning the cane). No other implement has ever focused my mind so much. I’m not entirely sure where my extreme, obsessive love/(but mostly)hate relationship with this implement came from. Part of it comes from the fact that it appeared in stories and historical things that I read and in films which I saw during my pre-spanking fantasy period. Part of it comes from the fact that early on in our dynamic, Paul sent me a very detailed email about how intended to use this particular implement on me and how it was going to feel. I received this message at a time when I wasn’t really playing, and certainly not in the way I wanted to be, and it became a seed that grew into a fantastic tree of delightful and terrifying fantasies. Then there’s a film from Nimue’s World entitled “I’ve Seen You” that I’ve been a bit obsessed with in which Paul plays a wonderfully creepy character who beats Nimue rather mercilessly with said implement. This film is dark, but in reality, totally consensual and I find it very, very hot. Then, of course, there’s the reality of the thing. “The other thing” hurts, to me, in a way nothing else does. Hot, pinching, biting, swelling, firey hurt. I think it has a 100% “made Alex cry” rating still. Owwwwww.

To return from my tangent, I sat on the bed wringing my hands at this announcement. I seriously considered begging for a caning instead, but I maintained my composure, as I knew I had messed up and I knew I needed to be punished. If I had asked for something else and received it, even if it had been severe I would have felt like I got away with something. It wouldn’t have put me in the headspace that I needed to be in. So I just looked down at the ground and was quiet and obedient. Besides, he had approached this as an alternative to a caning and mentioned that I “think” it’s worse, which could have seemed patronizing but wasn’t. To me, it suggested that it wasn’t intended to be (this time).

First there was a warmup, which happened OTK and was very short and made me pretty sore itself. I had tears forming behind my eyes before the proper punishment even started. The proper punishment arrived soon, though, and I was ordered over the end of the bed and it was announced that I’d be getting eight: the rounded-up version of half my usual punishment. The first stroke landed and I wailed and started to cry, although I recognized that he wasn’t doing it quite as hard as he usually did. On the second stroke I dared to look over my shoulder and saw that, indeed, he wasn’t swinging with the ferocity that he usually had. This didn’t stop it from hurting terribly, but it was more manageable. I couldn’t help but cry at each stroke, though, especially when I focused on the careless thing which I had done earlier in the day. I let the pain focus me on my desire to be a good girl, and I cried out my frustration with myself and my guilt at my earlier behavior. My cries got louder as the number got higher, but soon, it was finished. It wasn’t a severe punishment: a lot of it had been in my head, but I felt much better for it.

It took me several minutes of lying on the bed gasping and clutching Penelope before I managed out my thanks for the punishment, but once I did I was reminded that I’m a good girl and wrapped up in a delightful snuggle. Then it was time for photos and to get ready to actually go to sleep!

See? Not TOO bad!

Unfortunately for me, I had a hell of a time sleeping throughout the entire party, so at six AM, after having no sleep the night before, I accidentally woke Paul up because I was literally in tears from insomnia. Awww, that’s pathetic. He gave me a sleep aid and cuddled me and stroked my hair and eventually I did fall asleep. I had a big day ahead of me…

On Saturday morning, I woke up with anxious excitement. I casually cleaned some things up, although I was distracted. I kept my phone in hand no matter what I was doing, and made careful observation of the time. I had told Malignus that on this day, he’d be getting his birthday surprise, and I know that he was aware that this was the cause of my vigilance. Still, I tried to be as relaxed as possible, and I paced myself as I killed time.  Finally, I decided to take a shower and get dressed. After that, I figured I might as well throw some makeup on– I wear makeup about half the time, and while I hadn’t originally been planning on it, my skin was a bit broken out and, more importantly, doing that would take up more time. I was halfway through doing so when I got a call. ellee had arrived.

Unbeknownst to Malignus, ellee, PTL, Heather Green and I had been planning the greatest surprise that I’d ever planned for someone. We’d been working on it since October, and after many ups and downs, things were finally coming to fruition. The original plan had involved having all three girls secretly travel to Sioux Falls to visit, but PTL had to drop out due to the constraints of her responsible, adult life.  Planning this had been incredibly difficult, mostly because I’m not used to having anything going on in my life which I’m not discussing with Malignus. It involved a lot of sneaking around, which I’m not used to. I had to start taking phone calls outside to discuss logistics, and that meant being cold a lot. Not being able to get PTL out was a big blow, and I couldn’t explain why I was disappointed that evening. Both Heather and ellee got sick right before they needed to travel, and I couldn’t explain why I was so nervous when that happened. Heather’s flight time changed, and the plan regarding picking the girls up from the airport in Omaha (which is a much more economical airport to fly into than Sioux Falls, but is three hours away) got very screwed up and I had to figure something else out while walking around the neighborhood in the cold at 10 PM talking on the phone. But most days, I just felt like I had an overly excited bird in my chest whenever I thought about things. I’d never been so happy to do something for someone else in my life. I kept losing sleep due to this excitement. I grew paranoid that I would accidentally do something which ruined the surprise, and I very nearly did once. But finally, the time had arrived. ellee had landed earlier that afternoon and rented a car. She had finished driving to our apartment and was in the parking lot.

I got my shoes and coat on and ran down to see her. We had a lot of hugging and bouncing with excitement, and then got her things out of the car and prepared to go in. We finally came in and announced the surprise. Malignus didn’t respond in a way which suggested that he was startled or anything. He just had his most happy face on. He and ellee hugged for a long time, and then I gave ellee a tour of my apartment, as it was her first time visiting, and I introduced her to my guinea piggies, Tesla and Newton. After we finished with that, ellee went to get changed and Malignus gave me a big hug while he thanked me for this. He was clearly super happy, and he didn’t know that he had only gotten half of the surprise. 😀

Meanwhile, Heather was on her flight to Omaha, and would be arriving in a few hours. Because she is not of the legal age to rent a car without having to pay an incredible amount of money, I needed to go pick her up. I told Malignus that I wanted him and ellee to get to spend some one-on-one time, since they had only previously hung out during parties and hadn’t seen each other at all since he began the process of becoming her Dominant. This isn’t a lie– I wanted them to have that time because that’s incredibly important. It was also a convenient way for me to make my exit to go speed (er… drive exactly the speed limit) off to Omaha to gather up Heather.

Apparently ellee and Malignus had a great time while they were on their own and Malignus didn’t suspect what I was actually doing. One thing which is great about him is the fact that he doesn’t really pry. If I say “I’m doing something right now,” he often doesn’t even ask what, exactly, that something is. He just trusts that if he needed to know, I’d tell him. So when I told him that I wouldn’t be getting to dinner until around 7:45 instead of the 7:00 we’d planned on, he didn’t ask me why. He just enjoyed the extra ellee time that he was getting. Meanwhile, I arrived at Omaha, found Heather, hugged her madly and jumped up and down some more. I haven’t seen Heather in a few months, and it was really too long. Malignus hadn’t seen her since June, and I knew that it was really starting to get to him, and I couldn’t wait for him to find out that she was here. After taking a quick second to look around and reminisce (as the passenger pickup area of the Omaha airport is where, accompanied by Heather and a similar amount of excited butterflies as were in my stomach at the moment) I first met Malignus in person just a year and a half ago) we were off. The drive went by much more quickly when I was with Heather (who was kind enough to take the wheel and give me a break), and we chatted about a whole plethora of things. We kept coming back to the fact that Heather recently became engaged, though. It’s a pretty exciting thing, and I’d been waiting to give her an enormous hug ever since I first heard about it. I may have even hugged her while she was driving, which I don’t think you are technically supposed to do.

Finally, we made it to Sioux Falls, where Malignus and ellee had just arrived at the restaurant where we’d be eating dinner. It was fortunate that a table for three is always actually a table for four. Snow was falling in big, fat flakes, and the wind whipped around us coldly as Heather and I rushed from the parking lot to the doorway of the restaurant. I was so excited that I kept forgetting to breathe. We made our way in and were pretty much immediately greeted by the sight of the two them at the table. Malignus saw Heather right away and exclaimed “Oh my god, you too?!” There was a lot more hugging, and we explained what, exactly we’d been up to. We also explained about PTL’s intended involvement but unfortunate lack of presence, and we all agreed to skype her once we got home.

Oh hi! We love you! Heather, Malignus and ellee (who is hiding her face, but totally smiling, too!)

The dinner was just incredible. It was one of the happiest meals ever. There have only been a few times in my life that I was so happy that I experienced a certain kind of derealization, a sense of shock at just how good my life was at that moment and difficulty accepting that this was really the case. I felt that way when I was accepted to college, during my first spanking, when I first flew on an airplane, when I visited England and Japan and the first few times that Malignus and I were together. I basked in that feeling now, beaming with pride that I’d really been able to pull this off. Malignus never stopped smiling during that meal. Everything was perfect.

We spent the evening hanging out and enjoying each other’s company. Gifts were exchanged and cuddles were given. We went through our collection of implements, telling stories about many of them and giving out “test swats” with a number of them. After that, we spent some time chatting with PTL on skype. It was sad that she wasn’t there in person, but due to the miracle of the internet, we were able to have lots of fun with her, too. We went to bed really late, and I slept incredibly well, not having the nervous excitement of this upcoming event to keep me awake.

The next morning we got up and went into town. We had no particular plans, but Malignus wanted to take ellee to see our local Butterfly Sanctuary, since she’d never been there before, so we did that after brunch. The butterflies were very fond of ellee, and kept riding on her. One got particularly attached and clung to her for most of the time we were there, even laying five eggs on her. Butterfly eggs are small and iridescent. I had never seen them before.

ellee’s BFF hitching a ride.

After the butterflies, we stopped to stock up on supplies and then went home to hang out for a while longer. During this time there were plenty more spankings, including a demonstration of something which has been a nemesis of mine for a while now– towel snapping. Malignus is very proficient at hitting me with dish towels. He can make bruises and welts with a dry dish towel through my clothes. He started off by giving each of us a number of snaps with the towel over our clothes as we danced around, but this was so enjoyable that he decided to wet the towel to make it more effective and have us take our skirts off, so that he could hit us on our bare bottoms and legs. Due to the fact that we were just standing there and squirming, and because the “implement” weighed basically nothing so there was no risk of damage, there was a lot of hitting on the fronts of thighs and flank areas. Also, there was crying on my part. Stupid towels! So much sting!

Another “fun” activity involved Malignus hitting us on the fronts of our thighs with Twizzlers, something which I have only experienced while messing around with Beth Eisley and PTL. Malignus hits harder than PTL (yes, we already knew this). I still have some licorice shaped bruises, and ellee’s bloomed into something that could easily be mistaken for cane welts. The policy became that if one of us wanted to eat a piece of the candy, we had to be hit with it first. I feel that if all junk foods in my house could somehow adopt that policy, I’d have reached my trimming-up goal a long time ago. 😛 We still have a nearly full bag of Twizzlers. 😛

We went back to Sioux Falls for dinner, and then returned home to watch movies and have more spanking fun. I didn’t get any “full” spankings during the weekend, and that was basically the right way of things. The private, one on one time was dedicated to the girls that Malignus doesn’t get to see most of the year, and I was just filled with compersion for everyone involved. After dinner, though, I did get a number of swats with various awful things, as did the other two girls. The focus seemed to be on things which make weird marks, like a heavy plastic spoon with a hole in the middle that leaves an eye-shaped mark, the evil pasta measuring device with it’s several large holes and a twisted, delrin loop.


I also got hit with the rubber tred paddle that Malignus has named Old Glory a few times. It’s a challenging implement for me, because my first real experience with it was during a very hard disciplinary spanking, so I always associate it with hurting basically the most out of everything in the world. It *does* hurt an incredible amount, and I was slightly shaken after just six strokes with it (I originally got four, but I asked for two more because I wanted to do a better job of taking them calmly for my own personal reasons ^_^).

Post scary implement hugs tiems!

The evening finished up with movie watching and lots of banter. ellee had to leave in the morning, but Heather was staying with us until Wednesday, and I think that breaking up of things made the separating a little more bearable for me.

ellee, selecting movies without having to actually sit down. 🙂

The next morning, Malignus and ellee spent lots of time alone and he gave her tons and tons of spanking to hold her over until next they met, and to ensure that her trip home was very uncomfortable. 😀 Heather and I hung out during this time and started to fall back into the routine that we had when we lived together and spent lots of our time just chilling. I love that about Heather– even if we aren’t always in contact, as soon as we are, we just pick things up without any awkwardness or difficulty transitioning. When ellee opened up our front door to go put her bags in the car after things were finished, she found that there was a package waiting for me. Apparently my Christmas gift from her husband and my Dominant, YS, had arrived. She encouraged me to open it then. I realize in retrospect that I wasn’t sure if I was supposed to wait until Christmas to open it or anything, and I didn’t ask, but ellee was being really cute about it so I just did it then. -_-

He got me basically the cutest bear in the whole world. It has curly fur and a bow and a cute but sort of serious face. I’ve never had a Dom who bought me stuffed animals before, and it made me feel very snuggly and loved. I’ve been doing a lot of bear cuddling ever since. 😀


As ellee was leaving, I decided to give her my stuffed Tux penguin to take with her. This way, she can cuddle it and fill it with ellee love until we see each other again, when I’ll get it back from her until the next time we see each other when she’ll get him again! I am very glad that ellee gets to have some time cuddling him, because obviously ellee really loves Tux (once, when a friend was complaining about something in Linux, ellee whispered the admonishment “Tux can hear you! You’ll hurt his feelings!”).

It was hard to see her go, but Heather and I had big plans for the day. Malignus gave us two simple things that he wanted us to work on that day: going to the storage locker and messing around with some hooks on the wall so we could hang up some Christmas lights which ellee had brought for me. In true “Heather and Alex together” fashion, we ended up getting neither of these things accomplished (it was sort of not our fault) and instead went to the mall and indulged in lots and lots of girliness while Malignus was at work. Because of some kind of birthday miracle, we managed to not get in trouble for this, either. Ten points to Heather and Alex. After we finished hanging out (I was going to say we were good because we didn’t buy anything, but I guess that the other information included in this paragraph kind of cancels that out) we met up with Malignus and went to see The Hobbit. I’d already seen it once, on Friday night, but I was happy for a repeat viewing and it was Heather’s first time watching it. Everyone enjoyed it. 😀

Because Heather had to leave our house to get to her flight at 1:00 AM on Wednesday, Tuesday was the day during which we wrapped things up and got ready to say goodbye to her. It was pretty hard to see her go, but I know that we will be with her again, soon. I spent today cleaning and feeling kind of mopey about not having company anymore, coupled with taking care of Malignus, whose “ellee and Heather withdraw” symptoms are manifesting like a mild case of the flu. Still, I know I’ll see her again soon, and that many amazing adventures are waiting for me around the bend. When one ends, it’s always just the turn of a page. Who knows what’s waiting in the next chapter?

Oh, Hai!


Los Angeles, California, United States

First and foremost, I’m a girl who loves being spanked. It’s at the very center of my being. I’m also a professional spanking model, which means I get to do what I love for my job. I’m twenty six years old, and currently located in Los Angeles when I’m not traveling around on my adventures. My vanilla interests include poetry, film history, academia, Pokemon, indie music, baby animals, baking and cooking, collecting vintage clothes and lots of cuddling.

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